20 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Emotional abuse is real for so many people. This is why you should make sure that you know the signs of being in a abusive relationship.

By Magda du Plessis
20 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

20 Signs You're in An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Emotional abuse; the one thing that so many people are hiding, especially when they are in an emotionally abusive relationship. Because the scars aren’t on the body but in your heart, many people don’t see it and it is so much easier to hide. But, how do you know that you are really in an abusive relationship and that you are a victim of emotional abuse? These are 20 signs that you need to look for if you suspect that you are one of those people that are in an emotionally abusive relationship.

1. The first sign is when your partner embarrasses you in public

The first sign that you should look for to see if you are in an abusive relationship is when you are getting embarrassed by your partner in public. He is handling you negatively and is always saying something nasty to you. This can be really hurtful for anyone to get this type of treatment in public. This can leave you with emotional scars.

2. In your relationship, you are getting criticized for everything you are doing

It is leaving you with psychological scars when you are in a relationship where you are getting criticized for everything that you are doing. Even, if you are trying to do something special, you are doing it wrong and you are getting scolded for it. This is abuse and you should get help as soon as possible.

3. He is abusive when he doesn’t care about how you feel

Many people don’t know the psychological scars it can leave when your partner doesn't really care about how you are feeling about something. Even if you are really sick, he doesn’t care and isn’t going to help you with your tasks at hand. This is abuse when he doesn't care about how you feel about anything in the relationship or personally.

4. He uses love to punish you if you don’t do as he says

He is only giving you love or affection when you have done something right. The moment that you aren’t doing something according to his orders, you don’t get any affection from him. Abuse is basically when he is buying you with affection and punish you by not even giving you a good night kiss. When this sounds like your relationship, you should know this is abusive and you should get help to get out of the relationship as soon as possible.

5. In your relationship, all your dreams and accomplishments are stupid and dumb

Everyone has their dreams and wants to achieve something in life. But, every time that you are talking to your partner he says that your dreams and accomplishments are stupid and dumb. And, that you should not talk to him again about something as stupid as this. Everyone has the right to dream and if you aren’t allowed, then you might get emotional scars and this is abuse.

6. He is criticizing how you look and make sure that you are dressing his way

When you are going out to dinner or even just going to the shops, he is criticizing how you look and is sending you back to get dressed “properly”. Even if you were dress appropriately, you still feel cheap and gets insecure about yourself and the way that you are dressing. You don’t need help to get dressed because you are an adult and know what is appropriate and what isn’t. You shouldn’t let him hurt you emotionally with what you are wearing.

7. He is abusive when he shares your faults to other people and laughing about it

You are going out with friends. He is trying to hurt you psychological by making comments about you and sharing some of your faults or things that you have done to your friends and making them laugh about it. This is emotionally not right, and no one should make jokes about someone’s feelings and things that they are doing wrong. Everyone is makes mistakes because we are just human after all. Get help and make sure that you know that you aren’t a failure.

8. Another sign is when he isn’t treating you as a human being

You will know exactly what we mean when we say that your partner is treating you like a dog. He is abusive towards you and isn’t even speaking to you like a human. You are literally getting treated like a dog in the home. And, the worst part is that if you have dogs, he is treating them a lot better than he is treating you. This isn’t worth to be in a relationship like this.

9. Your relationship problems are all just your fault

Everything that is going wrong in your relationship is your fault. Emotionally, physically or even just financial problems. If there comes something up, it is your fault and you should be the one that is correcting this problem. Asking him for help isn’t going to work because it wasn’t his fault at all. Even, if this was actually his fault that you landed in this mess.

10. When he is blaming you for his problems it is a sign of an abusive relationship

When you are talking about emotional abuse and you are trying to tell him that he is abusive towards you, he is telling you that it is your own fault. That if you didn’t do this or that, that it wouldn’t happen to you. Even, if he is really abusive and nasty towards you, this isn’t his fault but yours. This is normally not true and you should get out of this abuse immediately.

11. He is making threats towards you when you are alone

When you are among other people he isn’t treating you as badly, but the moment that you are alone he is making threats towards you and even might threatening your life. Normally, this is after you went out with friends, and you were just a bit too friendly with the male friends that were with you. Even, if this isn’t true, you believe that this might true, because of emotionally scars that he is given you.

12. In your relationship, he is controlling the finances and making sure that you beg for money

Even for essential things that you might need, you need to beg him for money. He is controlling the finances and isn’t going to give you any money to survive during the month. You need to beg for any money. Even, if you are working and have your own salary, he is controlling everything. This is an emotional way to ensure that he has control of you in every way.

13. Nothing that you are doing is good enough

Nothing that you are doing is good enough for him. Not the food that is preparing or the way that you are making coffee or how you are sleeping. You are getting criticized about every little thing that you are doing. This isn’t because you are doing things wrong, it is because he is abusive and likes to make you feel insecure about yourself.

14. You are getting treated as a child

You are an adult, and you are getting a salary for the work that you are doing. You might even get a huge salary and is high up in the corporate world. But, the moment that you are stepping into your home, you are a child that gets treated like a child. You are getting punishments and getting duties and orders just as a child. This is abuse and you need to get help to get out of this situation.

15. He is making excuses for his behavior and blames other

He is making excuses for his behavior to blame others for his mistakes. He might be blaming you for the abuse or he is claiming that he was in an abusive relationship as a child and that he can’t help himself. You need to know that this isn’t an excuse and he can’t blame everyone for his mistakes. Especially for you.

16. He makes you feel that you can’t live without him and that you can’t end the relationship

You think that you are nothing without him and that you will not survive if it wasn’t for him. This is the normal sign of abuse and a sign that he is trying to keep you in this relationship. This is because he knows that if you are going to leave, you will see that you are actually able to live without him.

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17. He is telling others that you are the one to blame for the problems

Everywhere you are going, he is telling others that you are to blame for the problem and he even might suggest that psychologically you are the one doing the abuse. The worst part is that no matter what you are saying they believe him over you. He isn’t showing that side of him in front of your friends.

18. He is controlling who you might see and have a guest in your home

You need to ask him to get visitors to your home. You might not even invite your best friend to your home without asking him. He is totally controlling who you might see and who you can invite to your home. And, if you didn’t do exactly as he told you, he might refuse to allow any guests at home. Emotionally, this is one of the most common signs of abuse.

19. A sign of an abusive relationship is when he calls you names

He is calling you names. And, we don’t talk here about sweet, cute names that people in a relationship is giving one another. This is ugly, emotionally scar names that are hurtful. This is a way for him to feel powerful and to ensure that you know that you are basically nothing in his eyes. This is emotional abuse on the highest scale and you should get out as soon as possible.

20. It isn’t just man that is the one that is abusive

Emotionally abuse isn’t just man that is the one that is abusive towards the women in their lives. We tend to forget that women can also be abusive towards men and men are too afraid to let other people know that they are getting emotionally abused by the women they love. They think that this is a sign that they are weak. This isn’t the truth. If you are a man that is getting the abuse, then you should also make sure that you are getting out of the relationship as soon as possible. No one should be emotionally abused. And, you have the right to end any relationship, even if the person is trying to threaten you. Emotional abuse. The scars that no one can actually see. But, the damage that can be done is the same. There is no reason why you should take this abuse and why you should stay with someone that is abusing you. You should get help and make sure that you are getting out before the emotional abuse turns into physical abuse. If you recognize any of these signs in your relationship, you should get out immediately.

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