Age Differences In Relationships: How Big Is Too Big?

A common and popular saying goes that “Love is blind”. However, various studies seem to suggest otherwise. There are indications that age difference can be a determinant on how long the relationship will last. There are exceptions to the rule, such as the newly elected president of France, Emmanuel Macron, 39, who married Briggitte Trogneux, 64. But in most cases, research shows that relationships where there is significant age difference are likely to end in tears.

In one study that was conducted by Emory University, Atlanta, it was noted that the bigger the age difference, the higher the chances of couples going separate ways. Researchers analyzed 30,000 people and found that couples who had an age difference of 5 years were more likely to separate by18% as compared to those who were in a common age group. It gets even murkier as the study found out that those couples who had an age difference of 10 years were more likely to split by 39% as compared to couples who were in the same age group. It doesn’t end there. The study found that couples who have an age difference of 20 years were more likely to separate by 95% as compared to those who are in the same age group.

Unlike what many believe, researchers’ advice that the right age gap between couples is only one year. The study found out that such couples had only 3% chances of divorce.

Even though there are a few cases that are an exception to the rule, researchers suggest that there are a few challenges that come with dating a person who is in a different age group. The couple with a huge age difference is likely to face disapproval from their families, friends and the community at large. The couple will also find it difficult to relate to the peer group of each other.

Statistics show that men who choose to remarry either after the death of their spouse or after divorce choose to remarry women who are younger than them. According to a study that was conducted by Pew Research center in 2014, it was noted that out of the men who chose to remarry only 57% married women who were in the same age gap with them. On the other hand, another 20% chose women who were younger than them by 10 years. Another 18 percent chose spouses who were younger than them by 6 to 9 years. The same study also noted that only 11% of women choose spouses who were younger than them.

While there are many age-gap marriages that are happening, it is not uncommon for people to date a partner who is still considerably younger or older. Like we have already noted before, these relationships have their own fair share of challenges. So what do you do to determine whether the age gap will be a problem in your marriage? Here are a few considerations that you need to make when deciding whether to marry a partner in a different age group.

According to advice from relationship experts, where the two of you have similarities, it is an indication that you are going to be satisfied in the relationship. While this is a key consideration that all couples should make, the issue of shared preferences and interest should be a major consideration in the age gap couples. This is because age could end up being a factor that causes conflict as a result of different leisure activities, different spending habits and many other decisions.

Where the two of you are considering taking the relationship to the next level, you will need to discuss when you will enter into marriage. This is particularly important where there is an age gap between the partners. If your network consists of married people while the other has many unmarried friends, there may be different expectations and pressures between the couples.

Many age-gap couples report that they face disapproval from the people close to them. This kind of isolating may prove stressful and may lead to conflicts in the relationship. Even though couples who are in age-group relationships tend to be more or less committed as compared to those in a similar age group, the extent of the disapproval may cause them to minimize their commitment.

When a couple has many years between them, it may be more difficult to navigate this question. If one of the partners is their 50s or 60s, they may find it difficult to start bringing up children again. This is why it is important for couples to ensure that they are on the same page when it comes to this matter.

In case you want the age-difference relationship to become long-term, you may want to talk to a financial advisor who will give you a plan that will help to support both partners. This is especially the case because age differences can create challenges when it comes to relationship planning.

Where one of them is thinking of short-term fun and the other has their own long-term ambitions, this may be a source of conflict between the couple.