A married man is off limits
He could be your boss who always calls you into his office to see you. He might be the dad whose kids you babysit who texts you a little too much. No matter his situation, getting involved with a married man is a dangerous and tricky thing. It is definitely not a recommended route, as it can end in a lot of confusion and complicated relations, especially if you know his family. Knowing if this married man is actually interested in you is important. Once you know, you will confidently understand your boundaries and realize when to act. You need to be on the lookout for certain signs that will reveal his feelings towards you. But how do you know if he is actually into you? He does seem to treat you special, but are you just being silly and imagining things? Is he actually attracted to you? Whether you do want to pursue this married man or just want to know where to draw the line, below are some signs to help make that judgment.
1) He goes out of his way to talk to you
If this married man has no real business being around you yet somehow spends his time in your vicinity trying to get your attention, he is most likely crushing on you. Maybe you always happen to bump into each other in the break room and have a conversation together, or you routinely see him at the grocery store. Going out of his way to talk to you indicates that he has decided to act on his feelings for you. He wants to see you more, whether you like it or not.
2) He wants you alone
An excuse to get you alone gives him the chance to flirt and charm you. The ways a married man might coerce you into being along with him depend on how you know this guy. If he is your superior, he may make a lame excuse about wanting to discuss some business with you, like a boss calling you into his office. If it's the dad for whom you babysit, he may try asking you to discuss things alone in the kitchen with him. How do you know if he is flirting with you once you’re alone or if he actually needs to talk business? Watch his body language, where his eyes are pointed, and of course the content of the conversation.
3) A married man attracted to you initiates the talking
A married man likes you if he always starts the conversations between you two, because he wants to initiate any possible chemistry. What he discusses with you should also give you some hints into his interest and attraction towards you.
4) He takes an interest in your personal life
There are some boundaries about what is normal for a married man and a younger woman to talk about. Standard topics include very general queries about family, school, and hobbies. But if this married man starts prying for the specifics about your family life, wanting the details of your hobbies, and even asking about your friends, you can guess that he is attracted to you. These are signs that he cares about who you are and wants to know more about you.
5) He regularly asks about your boyfriend or dating life
Another topic outside the boundary of married man/younger woman talk is your love life. If a married man asks about your boyfriend or who you are seeing, he is thinking about you as more than a colleague, especially if he asks you while you are alone with him. Other than asking about whom you are seeing, he might want to know how you spend you free nights and what you and your boyfriend do together. Anything along these lines are signs that he is thinking about you in a romantic and/or sexual way.
6) The subtle signs from a married man's eyes
A married man knows what he likes, so he will probably use his eye contact to show it. The next time he talks to you, notice where his eyes go. They may look straight back at yours as he smiles while you talk, or they might take a trip down south. If he is bold (or stupid), he may try to hold his gaze down there for a few seconds.
7) Pay attention to his body language
How this married man carries his body around you could be one of the signs of whether he is interested in you or not. If in public or in a group setting with him, he may try to stand tall and proud to impress you. If you are alone, he may change his stance to stand close to you and lean against something to show he is relaxed. Pay attention to these signs, for an experienced man will be very subtle.
8) Subtle signs of his nervousness
On the flip side, if this married man is scared of his feelings for you, one of the signs could be his nervousness when he is around you. A married man trying to hide his feelings for another woman can be harder to spot. Watch out for any long pauses he makes when he is talking to you - as if he is choosing his words carefully -, how he looks at you during conversations, and if his eyes wander back and forth so as to not stare at you for too long. Uptight and timider gestures may also be signs.
9) A married man attracted to you notices how you dress
If a married man is interested in you, he will take notice of your appearance. Whether he makes a comment about a regular sweater you wear, your overall style, or his appreciation for how you do your hair, any of these things could be signs. These comments not only show that he is looking at your body but that he is confident enough to tell you that he is looking at you and how much he enjoys doing so.
10) He tries to make you laugh
A married man interested in you will try to charm you by making you laugh. You will know he is flirting with you when his lines are a bit more personal and not just general dad jokes. Watch out, though; if this guy has the confidence to pursue another woman as a married man, then there is a chance he is good at flirting.
11) He never alludes to the fact that he is married
A married man who is attracted to you will try to avoid the topic of marriage. He may do so in order to avoid feelings of guilt on his part or on yours.
12) A married man who's attracted to you smiles at whatever you say
Smiling and laughing at what you say is one of the signs a married man is attracted to you. He could be smiling to make you feel special, but if he really is taken by you and seriously interested, then this warmth will be genuine.
13) He texts you without reason
A married man who is attracted to you will display his interest by finding any reason to text you, even when the reason is not valid. Texting is the best way to hide his feelings for you from other people yet still making you feel special. What he wants to say to you depends on the guy, but it really could be anything if all he wants is to show you that he is interested. Even a simple comment, question, or "how are you" are signs that he likes you.
14) His texts have hidden messages
On the other hand, if a married man does have reason to text you - like if he is your coworker or you babysit his kids - he will show his attraction to you in other ways via text. He may text you more than required and constantly check up on you. If he is bold and really likes you, he may start texting you about things other than normal business. More conspicuous signs would be subtly flirting with you during your business conversations. The next time he texts you, look for signs, like a key word, that alludes to his interest in you.
15) This married man treats you special
If you typically see this married man in a group setting, like at work, at school, or at a bar, you might notice that his mannerisms seem a bit different when he directs his attention towards you. Even if he treats you just a little differently from everyone else, this could be one of the signs that he is attracted to you. His change in mannerisms may include any of the other signs included in this post, like watching you closely or his body language getting more erect and proud when talking to you.
16) He hides or plays with his wedding ring while around you
If he has a chance to hang out with you alone, a married man attracted to you will take his wedding ring off, even if it means playing with it in his other hand. By doing so, he is showing you that his wedding ring can easily come off for you. He might even hide his wedding ring all together when you are around.
17) He gives you things
If a married man gives you a straight-up gift, you can assume he is attracted to you. He may be more subtle, though, and give you something seemingly meaningless. Your boss might give you a pen for the office; a dad would give his babysitter a keychain for the keys to his house. Compliments, too, count as gifts. Whatever the gift may be, his wanting you to have something nice on his behalf says that he is thinking about you and wants you to know it.
18) He asks you to do extra things for him
On the other hand, a married man might want you to give him things. This guy will have you running little errands for him but he'll ask you in a nice and flirty way. He thinks it is cute to have you waiting on him and likes the idea of bothering you for his needs. These are gentle signs of flirting. It not only increases your contact with him, but also presents numerous opportunities for him to hide suspicious activity with you from other people.
19) He acts differently when his wife is around
A married man will treat you differently when his spouse is around him. He will look at you with less warmth (or avoid looking at you all together) and not get as close to you. The tone of his voice will change to sound more authoritative, and he will not ask too many prying questions. These habits are to mask the fact that he is attracted to you by his wife.
20) The most telling of signs: you feel uncomfortable around him
Trust your gut. It is easy to tell that a married guy is attracted to you simply because of the circumstances and the kind of vibe he gives off. However, the bottom line is if this guy makes you uneasy, makes you feel like he is watching you, or giving you too much attention, then you have every right to say something. If you're still second-guessing yourself, tell your friends about your interactions or ask them to watch for a second opinion. Know and respect your boundaries if the attention from a married man makes you feel uncomfortable. And because he most likely does not want to get in trouble, he will stop hitting on you once you say something.