15 Tips For Letting Go And Moving On

Letting go isn't a sign of weakness; it only shows you've got a re-direction. Learn some great tips for letting go and moving on here.

By Emmanuel Onitayo
15 Tips For Letting Go And Moving On

Letting Go And Moving On: What It Means

Life is not static and the things we once appreciated and loved can lose their value before us with the passage of time. That is because as each day breaks and new months come, we grow older and become more experienced concerning what is good for us. Therefore, we may come to the realization of the fact that we have to let go of some things (or even people) we once held tight too. Letting go is a brave decision; it is not easy. During the time you held on to that relationship, job, or habit, you would have formed a bond which may not be easy to break. But your conviction of what is best for you and the need to move forward with your life would make the breaking of such bonds a must for you. So, letting go means you're breaking off from a past habit or relationship. It means you are making a decision to leave someone or something you've once been with. But as good as leaving a bad habit or relationship may be, it is not complete unless you have devised a way of moving on with your life. Moving on entails you getting your act together after you have said bye to someone or something and then following the next course of action in life. If you are at this stage and you seem not to be finding things easy, it's normal. Moving on can both be difficult and painful. It can get so serious that you may even be contemplating suicide. But you don't need to do that. There are simple but proven tips that can help you to continue leading a purposeful life. These tips combine the capacity to let go and move on with such ease that you'll quickly forget the past and move forward with your life. Here are a few tips.

Letting Go And Moving On Tips

The fifteen tips highlighted below if considered would make letting go of someone or something easier for you and you'll also find it easier to move on with your life.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 1: Prayer

Prayer has been underrated today by many people, perhaps because they think it doesn't work or that only some set of people should observe it. To this extent, it is usually the last option in most of our decisions. But in letting go of a bad habit or relationship just as in every other life's decision, prayer should always come first. You know why? It's because sometimes, we can be mistaken in our definition of what is bad. For instance, in a relationship, you may think someone is not good for you because of their current behavior but in the eye of the Omnipotent, they may be the right person. After all, we have heard and seen several supposedly bad people change later on to become great and useful figures in society. That aside, even when you're doubly sure you are to let go of someone or something, you may lack the needed power, courage, and self-will to do so. In this situation, prayer is what you need. As you pray to God for help, He supplies the courage to take that unpopular but necessary decision you're about to take. And if you are finding moving on with your life difficult too, prayer isn't irrelevant. God can show you the direction you need to follow and guide you so you won't return to a bad, old habit. Simply put, prayer makes divine help available for you to let go and move on.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 2: Keep A Safe Distance

You cannot want to let go of a thing or someone while you still stay very close to them; no, you have to create a distance. For instance, if you plan to let go of alcohol, you would have to stay far from where it is sold or served. As also is it in a relationship. Letting go of a bad relationship would require that you leave the location where you can keep seeing your ex regularly. It's a law of nature that by beholding, we become changed. For certain things and people in life, if they can be kept out of sight, they might as well be kept out of mind. But if you linger around the thing or person you want to let go of, you've got a great chance of returning to them. Apart from this, you wouldn't have enough courage to move on because you'll still have an eye on the past. Moving on in life requires that we take our attention and eyes off the past and focus on the future. This may be pretty difficult if you still stay close to the former things.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 3: Admit Your Fault

In order to let go, you have to accept and admit your fault. Denying them can only keep you in bondage. And again, no matter how terrible your past relationship may appear to be, the truth is that there were also good moments too. Admit and acknowledge this reality. Doing so would help you get rid of bitterness that can keep you glued to the past. It would also make you forgive anyone you need to forgive and then you can move forward in life. Not admitting your fault would keep you looking for a victim to blame things on and that would not be of help to you.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 4: Take Charge Of Your Life

The decision of whether to move forward or remain in one spot is yours; no one except yourself is responsible for it. Friends may advise you, families may counsel you but you are the one to decide what is best for you. One principle of letting go is to take charge. Think for yourself, otherwise, someone else will do the thinking for you and when things go awry, you'll be there alone to bear the brunt. When you take charge of your life, you don't look for anyone to shift blames on if things don't go your way. You know you are fully responsible for the consequences of your decisions. So, if you are letting go of alcohol, a job, or relationship, let it be your decision. You shouldn't do so because you feel compelled to. And when moving on too, go where your heart leads. This does not mean you wouldn't take counsel from anyone; it only means you are personalizing the advice and making it yours. As such, things change from "They told me to do so and so" to "I chose to go this way or the other".

Tip 5: Forgive Yourself

Sometimes, forgiving others can turn out to be a bit easier than forgiving yourself. You look at your past and see the numerous avoidable mistakes you have made and you feel very sorry for yourself. Every day you whisper to yourself, "If only I didn't make that decision". You may have even forgiven an abusive or promiscuous partner but are still considering yourself a fool to have entered into a relationship with them in the first place. Thinking this way would only make the pains of the past to linger. Moving on requires that you forgive others and forgive yourself too. It is your acceptance of your fallibility that would make this possible. After all, there's hardly anyone that doesn't make mistakes. Humans are fallible. It's just that it is not our mistakes that define us but our attitude to it. And come to think of it, do you know that you cannot genuinely forgive others if you haven't forgiven yourself? That's just the truth. And to move forward in life, you have to forgive.

Tip 6: Don't Think Any Time To Be Wasted

As we eventually get to discover, everything in life is actually for a purpose. Even the seemingly lost time is for a purpose. If you check closely at your past life, you would discover you have actually learned one thing or the other from it. Even your mistakes can turn into blessings if you take them as a lesson; they simply have taught you how not to go about issues. Moving on becomes easier when you look at the positive side of everything that happens to you in life. And you know what? Most of our life's experiences have their good sides just that most times too, we choose to concentrate on the bad side to it. So, are you thinking the years you've spent in a relationship with someone as a waste? Have a rethink. You never can tell if it was meant to prepare you for this current one you are into. As it goes, some relationships are for a season; others are for a reason. It is up to you to discover the reason and move one.

Moving On And Letting Go Tip 7: Surround Yourself With The Right People

When you let go of a thing, habit, or a relationship, it is normal for you to feel a vacuum in you. If it's a relationship, you may feel lonely. This feeling of emptiness can make you want to return to your old habit or prevent you from moving forward in life. To avoid this, get to reconnect with your friends, family, and colleagues especially those who you know are mature and trustworthy. They can help feel up the vacuum by giving you the comfort and support that you need to get yourself together again.

Moving On And Letting Go Tip 8: Allow Yourself Time To Grieve

The loss of a friend or relationship is not a joyful experience. It is not unlikely that you'll feel shocked, hurt, frustrated, or heart-broken. You may not even be able to explain how you're feeling. Well, all of these are normal considering the situation. Where there is a danger is if you bottle them up. Weep if you feel like weeping. In fact, you may want to curse the day of your birth as is the custom of some; you're free. Just endeavor that you don't bottle up your feelings or inflict injuries on yourself or others while doing so. This is part of the healing process. Letting go and moving on can be impossible if you by-pass this stage. It becomes easy for you to accept whatever has happened if you have thoroughly grieved for it. It makes you process the event thoroughly in your mind and you can now begin to see things clearly as they really are. Grieving is therapeutic and if you must move on and forward after you have let go of something or someone, you'll have to allow it to run its course on you.

Moving On And Letting Go Tip 9: Recognize Your Fears But Don't Entertain Them

Sometimes, letting go can appear like you're leaving a certainty for an uncertainty. At first, it may even appear unwise a decision. You are not sure of what the future holds for you and perhaps difficulties start presenting themselves to you from left and right. What should you do? Admit your fears but don't dwell on them. You see, some of our fears exist only in our imaginations. If we're courageous enough to take the bull by its horn, the things we fear will soon become a success story. Don't be afraid of letting go of alcoholism because you think if you do so you'll lose your friends. Chances are that instead of losing them as you fear, you may end up winning them to your side. And if it is a relationship you are letting go of, of course, no one is saying things are okay out there but don't allow the fear of the unknown to grip you. Work on your fears and they'll become a testimony.

Tip 10: Forget The Past

In letting go of a thing or a relationship, you have to let the past be where it rightly belongs - the past. Don't allow your past to keep interfering with your present. If you are letting go of a relationship, don't allow the experience to make you become hostile to everyone around you; that would still mean you're living in the past. Becoming fixated on the past would rob you of the joy of the present. If care is not taken, you'll live your life in regret of the things you feel you should have done that you didn't do. And there is hardly any way you can go forward in life while you still dwell on the past. Perhaps you have to do is ask yourself if there is anything you can do to amend your ugly past; if there is, set about doing such thing(s) right away. However, if you cannot do anything about it, it's only wise to let it go.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 11: Concentrate On What Can Be Changed

In letting go and moving on, one bitter truth you would have to admit is that there are many things you don't have power over. You can't change some things and not all wounds can be healed however hard you may try. As a result of this, the best you can do is to identify what is in your capacity to change and work on it. Again, life is all about consequences. What goes around eventually comes around. Accept the possible consequences of your past and don't get bitter or discouraged because of it.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 12: Seek Professional Help

This is necessary if you are struggling with an addiction. You may need the help of experts to help you successfully let go of drugs or alcohol. With their expertise, they can make your effort of letting go easier and successful. There is, however, a right time to seek help. Do not wait until things have become very bad before going for help. If you do, there may be little or nothing that can be done to help you then.

Tip 13: Live One Day At A Time

Yesterday is past and tomorrow is still uncertain. You only have today to determine what your tomorrow would probably be. To move quickly from a painful past, you will have to take each day as it comes. Make no laborious plans for tomorrow because unmet expectation hurts and increases anxiety. Leave tomorrow to take care of itself but work hard to make your today a success.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 14: Be Informed, Read

By reading this article on how to let go and move on, you are already taking a step in the right direction. Information is power and those who are not informed will most likely be deformed. There are books written by authors of great repute from which you can draw inspiration for your life. Lay your hands on any of them and read. Of course, you should keep reading Panda Gossips' articles too as we have enormous information to enhance your lifestyle and relationships as a whole.

Letting Go And Moving On Tip 15: Watch

Once beaten they say is twice shy. Moving on in life can become frustrating when you keep falling into the same error over and over again. This can happen if you don't watch; that is, you don't take preventive measures to avoid making mistakes of the past. While you watch your action and movements by yourself, you can also enlist the help of your entrusted friends to watch your back. As it goes, when you come over an experience, you have the tendency to be carried away and fall again to the same error.

Final Thought

Life after a breakup, divorce, addiction, retirement, or resignation can be tough but it can also be managed so you don't get stuck or totally dejected. The way out is to be informed of what to do and what not to do and that is exactly what we have done here. The points highlighted in this piece if followed would make letting go and moving on less difficult.