10 Things that Middle Child faces more than their siblings

Find out the facts, behaviors and personality of a middle child

By Rosemary Zenith
10 Things that Middle Child faces more than their siblings

Middle Child Facts

The middle child in the family is most of the time stuck between two siblings who either love each other or hate each other. The middle child is mainly the referee of the house. Middle children face moments when they crave for their parents’ attention and the desire to be favored but fail badly. These issues are so common that there is a syndrome named “middle child syndrome” which explains a middle child faces mental pressure when putting between the drama of two siblings as well as the pressure of proving himself/herself.

However, there are some positive aspects too. The best part about being a middle child is that they get the best of both worlds. Depending on the circumstances, the middle child can be as playful and fun loving as will ever get.

Personality and behavior of a middle child

In spite of the fact that middles are usually ignored by parents, they really advantage from this over the long haul. They turn out to be increasingly independent, discover new possibilities, cope up with situations, and are highly sympathetic. Middles are social creatures and frequently invest a great deal of energy with friends. They may appear to be introverts, yet they like to build up their own circle and depend intensely on friends.

They are innovators, similar to Charles Darwin and William Dell. Middles are used to not getting their own definite manner, thus they progress toward becoming smart, skilled manipulators. They can see all sides of a subject and judge responses well. They are all the more eager to make a compromise, thus they can debate successfully.

Problems middle child faces

Being a middle child is a hassle for some. On top of being treated as a punching bag between the other two siblings, the middle child faces more severe problems like loneliness and identity crisis. However, there are more common problems that you will find every middle child has faced growing up with an elder and a younger sibling.

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1. Getting compared to their siblings… constantly

Ever heard your parents shouting at the middle child that why isn’t he/she as good as his/her brother or sister? Constantly getting compared to their siblings is like a regular thing for the middle children. 

The middle children are thought to be a person who must have the best of both worlds. If the elder sibling is prettier or smarter, he/she gets to hear why the middle child is not as good as the elder one. On the contrary, if the younger one is more talented or extrovert, the middle child suffers again. Coming to grades to dress up, the middle child gets judged and criticized for not being as good as the other siblings.

2. Lack of attention from parents

When you are the second child of the house, you know your parents will be choosing your siblings over you in several cases. As there are only a mother and a father, they take sides in most of the time with the elder and younger children, leaving the middle children to dwell on his/her miseries.

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3. Always receiving hand-me-downs

Have you ever faced a situation where you desperately wanted to buy a new toy but your parents were strategic enough to suggest you take your elder sibling’s toy to save money? Maybe not.

However, a middle child has surely come across such a situation where starting from clothes to electronics or even a new ride, they were asked to receive the hand-me-downs from their elder siblings. However, as the things get worn out by the time the younger one should receive them, the juniors get brand new things, just like the elder ones.

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4. Not getting any favoritism or special attention

Whenever children have a fight among themselves parents tend to choose a side. But what happens when there are two parents and three children? Yes, the middle child gets missed. Whereas the elder sibling and the youngest sibling gets special attention from parents, the middle child gets punished for even not doing anything. Ironic is not it?

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5. The constant battle to have freedom

With an elder and a younger sibling constantly poking you, it is hard for the middle child to get some space and be himself/herself. If he/she tries to plan something separately, the elder sibling shows disapproval showing concern whereas the younger one continuously wants to be tagged along in every party. Sure enough, it is hard to get a sense of freedom for the middle child.

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6. Being asked about siblings’ whereabouts all the time

For some reason, it is believed that the middle siblings know everything single detail about his/her siblings. Whenever the elder or the younger child is out of sight, the middle child has to answer to all the questions. It is funny how if the other siblings are missing the middle child gets all the attention and is expected to keep an eye on his/her siblings’ every move.

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7. Being the family negotiator

Growing up as the middle child, they certainly learn to be a good negotiator. Constantly negotiating for their rights and proving to parents that they are innocent and still existing makes them a good candidate for law or presidency from a young age. They usually save the siblings from the messes they create as well as get the heat of the parents for certain actions done by the other siblings.

8. Getting blamed by parents for siblings’ behavior

The middle children tend to be the punching bags of parents when cannot directly shout at their favourite child. As parents often side with either the elder child or the younger one, the middle child mostly becomes the one who gets scolded by them without doing anything wrong.

9. Ending up feeling lonely

Sadly, many people fail to understand that even if the middle child has two more siblings, they are often lonely and introverts who fail to express themselves. Although due to the constant struggle to prove themselves they become a good debater and gains skills of leadership, that does not take away the loneliness they feel.

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10. Continuous struggle to prove individuality

Ever noticed parents treating their favourites with rewards for good grades or winning a talent competition? Often the elder and the youngest one gets praised as one is the first child of the family to acquire talents and the other is the apple of everyone’s eyes for being the junior. The middle one just gets lost in the crowd. It takes a special talent or some prestigious awards or position to highlight the middle child’s uniqueness in the family. Even sometimes, the middle child is expected to follow the footsteps of their elder sibling which discourages their individuality.

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The stereotypes of Middle Child

There are some common stereotypes that follow the term “middle child”. Even though in most cases a middle child does come across these problems but there are some positive aspects to it as well which are often looked over. It is believed that a middle child is pessimistic, neglected, overlooked, introvert, depressed, not ambitious, uncreative, and so on.

However, a middle child has many positive sides in him/her. To begin with, a middle child is very optimistic and observant. They are social and team players. They are more like to be more empathetic, confident, cooperative and creative. Just like Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears, Bill Gates, Madonna, Abraham Lincoln etc. the middle children have the leadership skills to be successful.


Being the middle child is not such a terrible thing. It has its points of interest and shows children the uniqueness of people and their skills.

We can all stop the “middle child syndrome” by accepting every child’s uniqueness and not making them feel less than their other siblings.