Make him come back to you
Will he ever come back to me? This is a question that goes on in the minds of many girls right after a breakup. As a woman, if you were truly in love with your ex, it will be quite difficult for you to accept the idea of moving on without him. It is not easy to find love and the moment you get Mr. Right, you will not want to let them go. In case you still have feelings for him, there are chances that he also still loves you. You will find it difficult to ask him to get back to you and therefore, it is important to know the signs that will show that he is still in love with you. So, what steps should you take to have your ex back after that painful breakup? Is there something you can do to make him miss you? One thing that you need to realize is that until you take these steps, you will not get a chance to know what is in store for your future with him if you keep holding on to the past. The good news is that there are some steps that you can use to make him come back to you by leaving him alone. In fact, with these steps, he will come back with more devotion, respect and a better perspective. Think of the long-term, rather than short-term goals in any relationship, so that it lasts you a lifetime. That is the key to happiness.
1. Did he ask you to leave him alone?
If he asked you to leave, then the best way is to do exactly that - leave. At times, this is all what is necessary. The reason will not matter much at this point. Unless he is one player who is extremely egoistic, a man will always mean his words. You do not have to try to twist his words to make them sound better or worse. Instead, take his words as they are, give him his space and decide your next move from there. The good thing with this step is that you will also get the opportunity to enjoy your own space just like him. Use this time to do your own things, to hang out with your friends and considering the type of relationship that you would like to have with him.
2. Keep yourself busy after you leave him alone
Avoid being available whenever he calls or even text you. Instead concentrate on your goals, hobbies, career, family and friends who have an important place in your heart. Instead of texting him, focus on a project at work or go out with friends. However, you should note that keeping yourself busy will only be a good step if only you have something to do. Therefore, commit to your favorite things and focus on something that is able to make you happy. Also avoid sending a text to him at this point.
3. After you leave him alone, stop posting on social media
While social media has always being a great way of hooking up with your friends, new and old, when you are breaking up with your boyfriend, it can prove to be a dangerous thing. You will get to a point where you will want to share a quote on breakups or your decision to leave and this will only serve to add fuel to the fire. Before you do that post, pause and ask yourself what impact it will have. Instead, you need to be honest with yourself and ensure that you only send texts with a clear message on how you feel. The most important thing to ensure that he misses you is by going away and keeping yourself busy. Move on with your amazing life.
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4. Call and text if you feel like doing it
In case you have something valuable to say to him, do not be afraid to call. Not only is it polite and responsible, but it ensure that your calendar remain orderly. There is no exact rule on the number of days that you should wait before calling and it is also nonsense that you must wait for him to call first. The most important thing is to ensure that you are honest with yourself. If you plan to call to listen whether there are any women in the background or you want to see whether he will say some nice things, you are better off not calling. If you told him that you have left, you are better off not getting in touch with him. In fact you better delete his number. Don’t call, texts or send direct messages to him on social media. Remember that you chose to breakup with him and you need to remember what caused you to make this decision. When you come back, this will only make you seem weak and the next time you will declare that you want to leave, you will not be taken seriously. This is not to mean that you will never speak to him again or you will never reconcile. But give him time to come back to you.
5. Understand who you are and leave him alone
One thing that you need to realize is that if he was truly in love with you, he will always come after you. This may be after a few days, months or years. However, when you show him that you are ready to stand firm and leave respectfully, he will miss your company and will follow you in one way or the other. Not only will he miss you but he will start wondering what you are planning or why you feel okay without his company. The key thing is to avoid waiting for that can come back. You cannot seek your space with the hope that he will come back to you. Accept the fact that he has asked for his space and move on even as you remain the same, amazing person. While it will suck and even hurt, starting the moving on process is usually more important than holding on to yourself. When he decides to come back, it will be you who will decide whether you are still interested or you should find another relationship, which is worth pursuing.
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6. Avoid begging him to come back; just leave him alone
One of the key things you should do is to ignore him and avoid begging him to come back. This should not happen no matter how much you may love him as it will not do you any good. This is will only serve to make him get annoyed with you if you show him that you are too desperate and needy. Of course his thoughts will be that you will go running after him. However, it is your role to surprise him and the only way of doing that is by moving in the exactly opposite direction. Show your man that you no longer miss him and being apart is the best thing that could ever have happened to you. In case he is truly interested in you, he will come back. Ensure that he has some space after the breakup. A good idea is to leave him alone for a period of three to four weeks after you go separate ways. After you later contact him, avoid doing it too often and avoid bringing up the issue of the relationship. Just pretend that it is over for the period even as you remain friendly and ask him how things are going. Avoid being friends expecting him to come back. Trying to befriend your ex will definitely end in a disaster. Asking him out for a coffee everyday will be a bad idea. Like we have already said before, the key thing is to give him space. A good idea would be to let him want to talk to you. If you are trying to befriend him so that he doesn’t forget about you, this will not happen. Do not allow the fear that he will forget about you get the better of you!
7. Effect some changes that will cause him to come back
You will need to go out of your way to ensure that you look more attractive. This can help to make him notice you even as you continue to ignore him. Dress in clothes that flatter your curves, ensure that your hair is well fixed and wear the right make-up. He will use any chance he has to glance at you. When you talk to him, be sure to sound interesting. Speak to him about things that he has interest in. This will make the conversation remain smooth and nice. You will cause him to want to talk to you in a smooth way when he notices how interesting you are. Remind him of your good times together. After giving him his space for some time, you make him miss you. Later, you should tease him a bit on the wonderful time you spent together. Ensure that you remain light during all the interactions. Don’t be emotional and avoid crying. Ensure that you do everything within your means to remain cool. This will make him miss you and long for you more. Don’t tell him of your decision to move on. People who have decided to move on do not go telling their boyfriend of this decision; instead they just ignore them. Therefore, if you contact him to let him know that you have moved on, this will show him that you miss him and are desperately waiting for him to come back to you.
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8. Consider why he decided to leave you alone
Why did your guy begin to ignore you? Is there something you did that ended up hurting him? For instance, could you have cheated on him? Is there something that you said behind his back or you said to someone that you love another guy? If you have an idea, you will need to prove that you still love and care about him. Show him that given the chance, you would like to make those things right. In case you do nothing to have him back despite you being the cause of the breakup, there is no way that you can expect him to come back on his own. In fact you may be putting in him the idea of finding another woman. If he was the cause of the breakup, the question on whether he will come back to you will depend on both of you. Consider whether he has asked you to forgive him but you chose to be too proud to accept him back. You should bear in mind that you are also not an angel and there may be some mistakes that you made. Consider whether it is time to forgive and take him back. In case he hasn’t asked for any apology, it could mean that he is not sorry for whatever he did. Even if you forgive him in such a scenario, he will still hurt you again.
9. Leave him alone until he decides to come back
As a woman, one of the mistakes that you can make is to beg him to take you back immediately after the breakup. No matter how much you love him, begging will not make him come back to you. In fact it will only serve to show him how desperate you are for him. This is particularly the case if he decided to leave because he was angry with you. You will make him feel certain that he made the right decision. Bad breakup behavior may cause the breakup to be final. Do not try to erase the reason for his leaving you and bargain with him based on the reason for the separation. This is one of the bad things that you can do, as it will only remind him of the pain you caused him. A good idea would be to pretend that you have met him for the first time. Stay hot and make him long for you than ever before.
10. Don’t criticize his new girlfriend
A common misconception among girls is that talking ill of another woman will make him see the value of sticking with you. However, this is false. In fact many men have that protective instinct. Trash talking will only make him come to the defence of his new girlfriend and this will have an effect that is the exact opposite of what you intended. Avoid blackmailing him that you are in love with someone else. As a woman, you may be tempted to spread a rumor that you are seeing someone else with the hope that he will hear about it and come back to you. This will rarely have the effect you desired. In case he has feeling left for you, these will be killed by the rumor particularly where it is not a long time since the two of you broke up. No man wants to pursue a woman who has no time for him.
11. Have a positive view after he decides to come back
Now that he is coming back, you will need to have an idea of the direction that you want the relationship to take. You should then behave in a way that supports the vision. Ensure that everything unfolds in a natural way and remain open to the possibility of different outcomes. No matter how things turn out with the man, you can be assured that things will be okay. In case he happens to come back, you can be assured of a relationship that is more loving and fulfilling. You will also set higher standards on how he treats you.
12. When you don’t need him to come back
No matter how desperate you may be to have him back, there are instances when he may not be worth having back and you may need to completely ignore him. This depends on whether he is physically or emotionally abusive, forces you to engage in illegal, immoral and unethical things or if he has a problem with substance abuse. If he has been cheating on you, cannot be trusted and keeps lying to you, you should forget about him. If you ex has these poor traits, just ignore him and move on to the next guy who is worthy of your love.
If you can use these tips to make him come back to you without begging, you can be assured that you will get a better man who will respect you more. This is because you will have set a higher standard of how he treats you! That is very important if you want to maintain dignity in your relationship for a long time to come. If you do not do so, your worth will never be respected by your partner, which is not good for the future of your relation. Therefore, do not be afraid; just use these tips to make him come back to you without begging.