Talk That Talk
No matter the phase of your relationship (courting, dating, monogamous relationship), you may find that continued conversations can be complicated and hard to keep up. It's not that you're not interested in your girlfriend, but the constant subjects to discuss become draining and complicated. In other words, keeping up with the talk can be difficult for some couples. You might have thought communication would've gotten easier with all of the technology available, but with all the technology surrounding communication, simple conversations can be difficult for couples. Complications when communicating can surround dilemmas like, "how soon do you send a message?"; "how soon do you reply?"; "do I text or call?". These difficulties can become compromising to any relationship. But most importantly, they can create tension in relationships, causing your girlfriend to feel as if you don't care enough or are not engaging enough in the relationship. But, regardless of the level of your relationship, communication is key. In the end, good communication leads to a lasting relationship and deeper understanding.
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Girlfriend Takes the Lead in the Talk
When the conversation is led by the girlfriend, it can take a different direction. Because girls are known to be more emotionally involved in relationships, the conversations can lead to deep topics. However, girlfriends are also known to keep conversations fun and upbeat. Be it a call or text, conversations led by your girlfriend can prove to be different than the conversations you'd normally have.
Girlfriend Sends You the Text
Fun texts to share with your girlfriend can either be light or filled with emotions. There are stages of the relationship being built and we are here to help:
Getting to Know You Text
1. The "Hey" Text: The simple "hey" text can be one of the most complicated texts a girl can ever send out to you. Depending on the time of day it's sent out could dictate the direction of further communications after the "send" button is pressed. As the boyfriend, always keep in mind that a "hey" text can be received with complications and be prepared to handle them. 2. "WYD": We've all done it; you're bored at home and suddenly send out the infamous "wyd" text. Be it to from your new girlfriend or an ex, the 'wyd" text can be misleading in its reception. Be honest when answering and keep your response simple. 3. "Wanna Hang": You've moved beyond the "hey, wyd" text, and now your girlfriend wants to spend some serious QT with you. A simple "wanna hang" text can send a clear message.
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We're Official Text
1. "I Miss You": This text when received from your girlfriend should be followed with similar words and tones. When she states her affection for you, follow through with understanding and this will continue building your relationship. 2. "I'm Sorry": This text will rarely be received from your girlfriend, so when it comes through, respond in the most humble manner. Regardless if it's from your present girlfriend or an ex, this text will give you a strong understanding of how you behave in the relationship. 3. "I Love You": Always respond in honesty when you receive this text. If you love her respond accordingly, and if not, send her a simple smile or blow-kiss emoji. This will keep her at bay until you decide how you feel.
What's Happening to Us Text
1. "Are You Serious?": Ok, this text can be misunderstood if not handled with care, always follow this text with a phone call. This will clear up any confusion as to what exactly you are or aren't serious about. 2. "I Can't Believe You": Yes, this text will come out of the blue and just as much as she can't believe you, you will not either. But the most important action to take is to help her find clarity so that she can believe in you. 3. "We Need To Talk": This is the death text that all boyfriends dread. But this text is not all that bad. "We need to talk" can also be as much fun as it is presumed dreadful. She could be sending the text to ask for help, encouragement, support, etc. However, don't be ignorant. Remember "we need to talk" can be exactly that.
Girlfriend Call to Talk
We all know that there is a significant difference between texting and a phone call. A text leaves room for interpretation whereas a phone call can be blatant and cause upfront understanding. When a girl calls a boy, usually there is thought and planning behind the phone call, so be prepared to answer any questions or engage in any conversation that she wants to have. Keep in mind, a girlfriend starting a conversation has specific topics she wants to talk about.
Boys are known to be less communicative and they like it that way. But fortunately for you, your girlfriend likes to talk to you. She enjoys getting your point of view on key subjects. Your girlfriend's favorite pastime is listening to you talk. This could be awkward for a boyfriend who doesn't like talking so much. Have no fear, below is the blueprint to talking to your girlfriend about any and everything:
When you send your girlfriend a text always keep her emotional state in mind, no matter the type of text you send to her. Always keep in mind that when texting the message you send out might not be the message received. Your tone in your message may not be what she is receiving based on her interpretation. Keep your text simple, with as little emojis as possible (as a matter of fact, only use emojis you are comfortable with). Never send conflicting messages and always be as honest (and empathetic) as possible.
Boyfriend Call to Talk
So you're in control of the conversation with your girlfriend and have no idea where to take it. Follow the steps below to become an expert in communicating with your girlfriend:
Ice Breakers in a Call
The beginning of all conversations can seem like a difficult task, and icebreakers are the most important segment in any phone call. Here are some simple subjects to break the ice of any conversation: 1. Funny childhood story: This will bring your girlfriend's attention to you and show her that you are engaging in the conversation. 2. Talk about Hobbies: Talking about things you like to do will give you an insight into one another's lives. Hobbies are a great way to see what future activities you two can do together as the relationship becomes more settled. 3. Talk about Her: All girlfriends love to hear their beau describe reasons for selecting them. And the more warm, affectionate words you pour on, the more she'll melt for you. 4. Talk about Your Faves: Be it your favorite foods, movies, places to visit; keep the conversation going by engaging each other in your lives.
More In Depth Conversations
1. Share Happy Moments: You know those moments in your life that you still laugh or simply smile about? Include her in those memories by sharing them with her. 2. Compliment Her: This adds to the showering of endearing words. Complimenting her will show her that you care and are unafraid to show her so. 3. Let's Talk about The Bedroom: Yes, this topic is on the table as well. The more you know about what she likes or dislikes, the better your bedroom fun can become. 4. Secrets: Tell her something about yourself that only she'll know. Make it fun to keep secrets with one another, because the more she knows about you, the more trust she'll put in you.
Next Level Talk
With the introduction of face-time, society has taken a whole new level in communicating with one another. Technology like face-time allows couples to see one another while holding conversations. Face-time enhances the opportunity that couples have when building a more concrete communication process. With face-time, couples can share moments that would otherwise be shared via text or simple phone calls.
Every now and then, a conversation will have to be held with your ex. Rule number one when engaging in these conversations is to keep an open mind. Be cautious of your emotions and allow your ex the chance to say what they need to say. Use the 2-minute rule when talking (in other words, never speak for more than 2 minutes at a time). This will give your ex an understanding of the growth you've gone through since the separation and allow them a chance to see you in a different light. Conversations with your ex will never be comfortable and the most you can do is keep calm and have as much fun as possible.
As the relationship becomes stronger, you will need better conversation topics and here are a few that may help:
1. Family History: Talk about your families once the relationship has taken a monogamous route. Let the conversation be about all things such as family health history, love history, successes, and failures. This will give both of you a stronger understanding of one another. 2. Make Plans Together: Yes, plan out your lives together and discuss those plans. The more aware each of you is in the relationship the better. Be it the planning of a vacation or moving in together, talk to one another about these things to make them easier to accomplish. 3. Friends: Tell her about your friends and have her tell you about hers. Once you've both decided the fate of your relationship, your friends will become more involved in your relationship, and giving each other the inside scoop is a good first step to successfully including your friends in the relationship. 4. Work: Talk to each other about your work days, but don't drown one another with information about the dislikes about your individual jobs or careers. Share the happy moments of work, and help one another through the difficulties that arise.
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Now You're a Pro!
Now you understand that regardless of whether the conversation is via text, phone calls, or face-time, keep the talk simple and fun. Your girlfriend will most likely take the lead in the conversation as you two talk about your shared interests. Your job is to match the fun energy that she brings to the conversations. Talking to your girlfriend gets easier and easier the more engaging you remain. Talks with your girlfriend will become as much your favorite pastime as it is for her. So go have that talk with her and get to know her on levels you never thought possible.