Mending a Broken Heart
A break-up, a split up, or a divorce could be devastating experiences for the heart. They can actually make your heart feel laden with sadness and fear. It is never easy to mend a broken heart and there is no quick way to make it stop hurting.
Some experts say it's like falling into depression, you actually feel broken with no desire to get out of bed, your appetite is gone and you feel like crying all the time. You don't sleep well and you experience episodes of anxiety when you think about the future. The emotional reactions and behaviors of a person who have suffered a broken heart are not pretty.
Any of this sound familiar? Are you right now trying to cope with a broken heart? It may seem like everything is lost and that you will never find someone to love again or be loved by someone. Don't despair, it's not easy to mend a broken heart but it is possible. There's still hope.
We'd like to help you find love again, so take a look at these 8 tips on how to heal a broken heart.
8 Tips on How to Heal a Broken Heart
1. Stand Still and Process the Heartache
We know that that is a very difficult thing to do, but it is exactly what you need to do. You can't go around the pain, you have to go through it because if you don't face it right away you're going to bump into it somewhere down the line. By doing that, the pain won't have a hold on you and you will emerge a stronger person.
2. Find a Human Crutch and Unload
Talk to someone who cares and will listen to you to understand what you're going through. You'll see how amazing it is to talk it out loud. He or she will be that teammate that will pick you up after an injury and carry you until you're good enough to walk on your own.
So go find a friend or a family member, someone you can trust and just start talking. We're sure once you finished unloading your heart will feel lighter and the process of healing will be on its way.
3. Make a List of Your Strengths
You'll find this super helpful. We all have strengths. And at times like this, when you are down because of a broken heart, we forget about them, but they're in there. So dig them up and make a list, remember all those times you beat a vice or made an intelligent decision, list your life accomplishments.
While listing them, maybe listen to a powerful soundtrack and you'll see that item by item your self-esteem will be restored. Before you know it, you are being productive again.
4. Try Some Detachment, Revel in Your Independence
Nobody is tying you down. That attachment you feel to the relationship or to that person is what's leading to your suffering. So, do the opposite and detach. You don't need anyone or anything to make you happy, you can do that by yourself. You can be whole without that person in your life. Believe it because it's true, the job to fill that emptiness you're feeling right now is yours.
With a little bit of courage, you can do it!
5. You Need to Cry But You Need to Laugh Too
Photo by David Calderón on Unsplash
Both crying and laughter can help the healing process. It's amazing how a good cry can help you feel better. Go ahead, try it! And don't discount humor and laughter too. A good laugh can also help lift your heart, some say that laughter is the best medicine and there's no doubt about it. So, try a sitcom, watch a happy movie or go have a coffee with a friend, before you know it you'll be laughing your way to a mended heart.
6. Forget About Yourself and Help Someone Else
When you feel that the pain is unbearable, try to think of an antidote. Maybe you need to box up what you're feeling so you can sort it out and most importantly find a use for those feelings. You may want to write something up and then post it in sites where people go to seek help, or just on your social profile, there's a chance someone who needs it will get it.
Go help a friend in need, or a total stranger, sometimes we need to forget about ourselves and our troubles and be there for someone else. That can give you perspective and maybe that is what you needed to make it through that day.
7. Sweat it Out
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A good dose of endorphins is always recommended. When you start feeling down, put on your gear and go for a walk or for a run, or go cycling or better yet go kickboxing! That will give you an immediate relief. Exercise works on 2 levels, physiologically you'll get an increase of serotonin levels and emotionally, you'll feel in charge again because this is something you can control.
Try a martial arts class and visualize that in front of you is the guy responsible for your pain and then just kick him where it hurts! We can assure you that it feels good
8. Try Something New or Different
You need to create a new world - one that is safe because the one you are in right now is not conducive to a healing process. Especially if it collides with his world, common friends are going to be a constant reminder of him because they are going to talk about him.
So you need new friends, you need to engage in new activities. Maybe you need to try new things, some art classes, or start a blog. You need to reprogram your mind and your body to live in a world without him. You need a fresh start.
Self Help Books for Him and Her
Books can heal too, or they can help you start. If you already love to read, a good book can be your escape for a little while and maybe inside those pages you will find what you need to start the healing process.
The wonderful thing about books is that they don't judge or impose their views. A book just whispers stories, it can be that friend who could shake and inspire you, or with a story that instills optimism and explains to you that a breakup is not the end of the world.
Below are two such books that can help you:
1. Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak by Larry Smith
There are lots of books that could help you with your healing process. A good choice would be Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak by Larry Smith.
Inside you'll find heartbreaking, confusing and sometimes optimistic memoirs that will inspire and help you. It's a wonderful collection of six-word confessions that can help you turn the page of relationships past and move on. It's a must-read for everyone whose heart has been broken.
2. Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
Halted as one of the bestselling books of our time, Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert tells a story about a divorced woman who went on a soul-searching journey across Italy, India, and Indonesia to find what she really wants. On her journey, she discovered ways and strengths that can change her life for the better. This book offers you insights through the world of another woman and it is a go-to book that can offer you some comfort.
Moving On Quotes
Need a little extra help to heal your broken heart? Here are a couple of quotes you can study and repeat. We hope they can inspire you to move on.
Photo by Ben White on Unsplash
Healing a broken heart could be a painful and long process, but remember to never lose hope. There is a light at the end of the road and you will heal and find love again.
There's one more thing you can do to help heal your heart. Above all, always choose to prioritize happiness. It may seem out of context if you're having a hard time during a breakup, remember that nothing is tying you down, you have a choice, so make it!
Remember to practice gratitude, that can help you to shift perspective and instead of focusing on the negative, you can start recognizing all the positive. Write it all down on your gratitude journal, and when you're feeling down, go there and read it.