How To Say Goodbye To Someone You Still Love Deeply

Love is a wonderful thing, but sometimes things may never work out and you will have to say goodbye to the love of your love. Find out how to do this.

By Dagmar Thomson
How To Say Goodbye To Someone You Still Love Deeply

How To Say Goodbye to Someone You Still Love Deeply

#love #couples

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Saying goodbye to someone you love is the hardest thing to do. However, when circumstances force you to shift far away or breakup, you will have no choice but to say goodbye to that person. The people we love in our lives have the capacity to change our lives forever. There are those we love only for them to end up breaking our hearts; there are those we love and our lives become much better. Being in love with someone is something we cannot avoid in life. You dream, hope, and plan for your future together. We all know we have no control over how things end up. Therefore, when things do not work out with the person you love, you need to let go and move on with your life no matter how hard it might be. Here are ways you can make your goodbyes a lot easier with the person you still love.

1. Take Your Time

People say that time is the best healer. There are wounds that heal with time; you forget and move on. There are wounds that become blurry in your memory. There are wounds that do not heal no matter how hard you try. Given time, the wound still hurts as if it is a fresh wound. Such wounds will only heal if you are gone too. Therefore, when you want to say goodbye to the love of your life, you need to give yourself time to heal. You will meet new people, have new life perspectives, and things will change with time. This is not a guarantee you will forget your past, but you will get used to the pain and you will learn to manage it. Time will help you accept the reality of your situation and you will be able to face the world.

2. Meet New People

Having a chance to meet new people will give you an opportunity to feel better and forget what is making you sad. You will be able to get your old self back. Meeting new people is a way to give you a chance to be in love again. However, while this does not mean you can love the same way, a little attention and affection will help you feel much better. People become irrational when they are hurt. They go out of their way to get involved in a new relationship within a week. Such a relationship does not work out. Therefore, you should tread slowly and take your time to know the other person well. This will make the relationship last longer.

3. Be Sure To Know Why You Have To Say Goodbye

When you have parted ways with the love of your life, it is easy to go down memory lane and relive all the details about your past together. You will wonder why you let your forever person go in the first place. You will miss the person and try to reach out. This will be a bad idea. Such things that will make you go down memory lane are love letters, love poems or even silly love quotes. Ensure you discard them all. Seeing them can bring mixed emotions that you should avoid. To control yourself you have to think of the bad memories too to retain a balance. This will remind you why you had to say goodbye to the love of your life in the first place.

4. Focus on Staying Apart From Each Other

It is normal for a person to want to get back together with the person they still love from time to time. However, you should remind yourself why you said goodbye in the first place. This will help you to stay focused on your decision. Controlling your emotions can be hard, especially if you have ample opportunities to get back together. You must stay focused, and keep reminding yourself why this is the best decision you made. If you lose focus, you will do something you might regret later. Do not doubt yourself.

5. Have the Ideal Person in Mind

For you to have a future spouse, you have to know what qualities you want your next love to have. Being aware of the qualities you want will help you find the right person. However, we all know nobody is perfect. Therefore, do not expect the suitable person to be perfect for you. In order for you to make the right decision, you can draft a list of the qualities you desire your next person to have. Compare the qualities of your ex-lover and the ideal person and see the difference. You never know, your expectations may be met.

6. Find a True Love

If you keep on believing that you lost your true love, chances might be you will never find love again. You have to say goodbye to your old memories and try to live in the present. Give yourself a chance to find true love again. In order to forget your lost love, you will have to develop pure feelings for someone else. The old memories will diminish with time and you will no longer crave the last person again. Finding a true love will help you move on. This is a great opportunity for you to find happiness again.

7. Forgive and Forget

We all have heard the saying forgive and forget. This is possible only if you are willing to let go of the hurt feelings. The only way you can move on with your life is by forgiving someone you still love, especially if he or she wronged you. The first step to say goodbye to someone you still love deeply is learning to forgive. Then you will be able to forget the person and move on. Most people who have lost the love of their lives tend to delay forgiving. They usually think ignoring them will solve everything. This is not usually the case. Once you forgive the person, you will forget the sad experience and you will be able to say goodbye with no hard feelings.

8. Discard All Evidence

You can convince yourself that you have moved on with your life, yet deep down you know you are still hurting. The hardest stage of recovery is getting rid of all the mementoes you have of your past love. If there are any letters, poems, quotes, images, gifts, and messages, get rid of them all. This may feel impossible, especially if you know how much that someone meant to you. You will feel like you are deleting his or her memory. Therefore, you will need support and strength from your loved ones. However, if you are determined to say goodbye to your lost love, you have no other choice but to discard all evidence. You can ask a close friend to help you delete all messages, burn all the love letters, quotes and love poems and to discard all the pictures and gifts on your behalf. The longer you hold onto to them, the longer you will live in the past.

9. Do Not Get Emotional

Whenever you come across something that reminds you of your past life with your ex, do not indulge in the memory. Such reminders can be cologne you have smelled, a small gesture from someone you have seen, among other small things. Immediately replace such thoughts with facts about your new life. It can be your new job, an accomplishment, or a project you are working on. Avoid wallowing in self-pity. It will only make your life miserable.

10. Be Your Old Self Again

Being in love can change a person and your perspective on life. Love has the power to destroy the logic of being selfish. A person becomes selfless and you dedicate your life to your love. However, when you break up, the realization will hit you hard. You will notice you have changed- especially how you viewed life. In this situation, you have to try to find your old self again. This is a great opportunity to be your own person again.

11. Write a Farewell Letter

When you to say goodbye to someone you still love, farewell letters can be helpful. You can write it in form of poems, quotes, letters, or notes. It does not matter if the person you still love will read it or not. The point is that you want to make it clear to yourself that this part of your life is over. In the letters or the poems, you can write how you feel, what made you angry, what brought all this, and what made you love the person in the first place. Some people feel that it is appropriate to say goodbye to someone you still love by expressing your feelings from your heart. If you are that kind of a person, writing a goodbye poem is the best way to move on. It is never easy to say goodbye to a person you still love face to face. Writing it all down will help you get it all out.

12. Focus on Changing Your Life

The shared life with your ex-love cannot be changed and you cannot rewind time. Therefore, if you want to say goodbye to your old life, you need to focus on changing things. This can be done if you manage to separate things that can be amended from those that cannot, such as the way you view life, a complete makeover on yourself, where you live, etc. This will help you to move on with your life.

13. Approach Life Positively

When you still love someone you cannot be with, life can feel impossible. You need to take things positively even if it is hard. You need to focus on your inner strength and principles to make it work for you. Approaching life in a positive way will make things work out for the better. Given time, you will forget your sad feelings and you will see life in a new perspective. It takes a strong-willed person to pull through. Having to say goodbye to someone you still love is a sign of maturity. This process makes you stronger as a person, and you will be able to learn from the experience. People grow when they learn from their mistakes. Therefore, approach life one step at a time and live positively. Being hurt is not the end of the world; you need to keep on living.