Courtship still exists
Nowadays, finding a date is much easier because there are already dating apps on the internet which is very accessible for almost all the people. Thus, courting is now treated as a thing of the past or something that only conservative people do. But, this is not entirely true. There are still women who'd want to experience being surrounded by suitors and want the old-fashioned way of courting. You might ask what you can do to steal her heart. Then, this is just the right page for you. Read and follow these tips so both you and the woman of your dream can have a perfect courtship stage!
1. Know the difference between courting and dating
Some people think that courting and dating are just the same. But no, though they both have similarities, they still have a huge gap of difference when you get down to it. When you're looking for a date, you are just looking for a partner you can be with for a short time to ease your loneliness. It's not often serious so the relationship usually ends in just several months. Moving on takes a lot less time before you can find yourself with another date. Basically, everything happens quickly. Courting is more serious. When you plan to court a woman, it's because you want to have a purpose in her life. You carefully analyzed your intentions and you want to build your future with her as courting is not self-centered. Progress in the relationship happens in a steady pace.
2. Before you court, confirm that you're ready
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Are you prepared to engage in a serious relationship? Or, what you're really looking for are women to date with? Can you handle long distance relationship? Courtship usually ends with marriage. Are you ready to build a family? Can you handle a woman with children? Are you already financially stable? And, so many more questions. If your answers to most of these is "no", think about it for the second time. Maybe you're just looking for a playful relationship and you're not into a serious one yet. Do not ever get into courtship stage if you aren't prepared.
3. Confirm your feelings for the woman you'd court
Before you get into courtship stage, ask yourself about your feeling towards her is really love. Nowadays, love is most of the time mistaken for lust. Saying "I love you" is too common now even when you are just physically attracted to someone. Confirm your feelings for her, ask yourself, "Do I just want to date her or do I want to settle with her? Is this the only woman I want to lay my eyes on?"
4. Court to marry, not just to date
Do you see her as someone you can be with for the rest of your life? Can you see yourself taking care of her? Do you see both of you playing with children? Can you imagine her walking down the aisle to finally receive her "I do"? If so, and you get excited at these thoughts, then try courting her. If you think about marrying a woman, it probably means you're serious.
5. Start with friendship
In this modern world, most adult people feel pressured to engage themselves into a relationship because even the younger generation or the teens find it easier to get into one. With so many dating apps on the internet, we sometimes tend to worry why we're still unsuccessful in romantic relationships. The answer to that is the pressure you're putting yourself into. Keep in mind that serious relationship takes time. Before you court a woman, start to build friendship with her first. At this stage, you'll get to know her better. You'll find out her personality, her attitude in handling different situations, and if she's fit to be in a long-term and serious relationship. Do not court a woman just because you find her aesthetically pleasing, or just because she's rich. If you are in a long distance courtship stage with her, this is one of the tips that are actually more applicable to you since it's understandable that your situation is much harder. Build friendship and set some limitations first.
6. Tell a woman the things you desire
If you want to court a woman, never hide the things you want to happen from her. Share to her the plans you have in mind. A serious relationship will eventually lead to a lifelong engagement, so you have to make sure if you both have the same goal. Tell her that the relationship you're building with her is serious and that you have the intention to marry her. Will she be willing to live a life with children or not? Is she ready to settle for a serious relationship or is she just into dating? And, so many more questions. These are important to know before you get really serious because you'll just disappoint yourself if you find out later when you have built a deep connection with her that you don't have the same mindset. It will be just a waste of effort and time.
7. Get to know her friends
When you get into a serious relationship, it's unavoidable to go out on a date in a group setting sometimes. You will get to meet the people in her life eventually, so it's better to get to know them while you're still into courtship stage. Meet her friends, and befriend them as well. But, set limitations. Though nothing's wrong in building a closer relationship more than just acquaintances with her friends, most of the time, this leads to a misunderstanding. Get to know the people in her life, but try to keep your focus on her.
8. Meet the family of the woman you're courting
It's a serious relationship you're getting into so don't miss meeting the most important people in her life, her family. Courtship is not at all like dating where you just take the woman you desire out on a restaurant, or any romantic places. If you want to court a woman, court her family as well. Visit her at home, and let her parents know your real intentions. Try get closer to her siblings and show her family that you want to be part of it. There is no better feeling than being fully accepted by your woman's parents.
9. Carefully plan your dates with her
It's OK to be spontaneous and adventurous because it's always exciting to just try new things without planning, but the risk is that there is always a possibility that things might go wrong and you don't want that to ever happen to a woman you deeply admire and whom you're vying the attention for. So, carefully plan the dates you want to have with her. Pick out an expensive restaurant, make a reservation, and buy gifts for her and she'll surely appreciate it. But, keep in mind that dates don't have to be necessarily lavish. Romantic dates are not only for the rich. If you have a limited budget, you can still plan a fun and romantic date with her. Bring her to a lovely park and give her flowers, or take her to the cinema and watch her favorite movie. But the best date would be to visit her at home and bring video games, and play with her and her siblings. Date her and her family.
10. Know that women love presents
What women love the most when they're being courted is when the men give them presents. Although the price really doesn't matter, it's up to you, as a man, if you want to spend tons for her. Of course, you don't have to be rich to be able to do this as you can also give her a hand-crafted present. It's actually sweeter that way because women also appreciate efforts.
11. Always initiate the move
Never be immature and don't play games. Don't test each other on who's going to make the first move. If you want to meet her after several days of not seeing each other, don't wait for her to be the one who has to remind you, rather, ask her to go out on a date. Don't wait for her to talk to you first, always try to open up a conversation. If you are in a long distance courtship stage, of course it's much difficult to adjust to each other's time. But, try to call her every now and then, or chat her through social networking sites.
12. Always be a gentleman
Keep in mind your etiquette and manners. Women love men who are very respectful, classy, and a real gentleman. Be cautious with your choice of words when you speak with her, don't be vulgar. Compliment her when you think she's looking beautiful.
13. Remind her of your intentions
Courtship stage should not be hurried, the more prolonged it is, the better. So, there will be instances that it might get casual as your connection with each other gets deeper. Always remind her of your intentions, and tell her that your goal to take your relationship seriously is still there.
14. Surprise her every now and then
Women love being surprised, so it won't probably hurt if you'll do it from time to time. And, you don't have to be rich to be able to do so. Surprises are not just reservations at a restaurant or buying her a diamond ring. Surprise her with unplanned trips, leave her a bouquet of flowers at work, visit her at home without telling her first, or just give her presents you made yourself. She'll appreciate the gesture and your effort.
15. Know the physical boundaries
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In most courtship stages, physical contact such as kissing, hugging, petting, and most of all sexual intercourse, are refrained until marriage. Though, a lot already begin to do these even before they get into a serious relationship, it's still important to discuss these things first with the woman you're courting. Know what physical boundaries she'd like to set between the two of you.
16. Don't use strong emotional language
As we all know, the words "I love you" are as common as greetings of "hi" and "hello". Even teenagers who are just probably infatuated with their crushes can already say this easily. So, before you use strong emotional language, assure yourself first if you really mean it. Refrain from calling her with pet names such as "honey", "love", "babe", etc. Save these languages when you're already into the relationship.
17. Always tell her she's beautiful
Although it's the personality of the woman you're courting that matters, you have to admit that the one thing that attracts you as well as her outer appearance. Always compliment her when you can and tell her how beautiful she is. Always remind her how astonished you were when you first saw her and how until now, the feeling didn't change. Compliments are one of women's weaknesses.
18. Show some affection
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Although you have to expect that there will be boundaries during courtship stage, it's still not impossible to show affection to her. Tell her sweet things, tell her that you love her in a funny and playful way, or smile at her whenever you look at her. Hold her hand and play with it, run your fingers through her hair, and the likes. If you are in a long distance courtship stage, call her every time you can, give her attention and make video calls. All of these may be simple gestures but they have a pretty strong impact when you really mean them. We may never get to explain it but women can feel your genuineness through body languages.
19. Work hard for it
Courtship is much more complicated than dating because it's more serious and broad. You are investing your plans for the future with the woman you're courting. It's not at all like dating where you just randomly go out with different people. So, you have to expect that it won't be easy to get a "yes" from a woman who is into a serious relationship. You have to work hard for it, and if you don't feel like doing it, you're probably not serious.
20. Courtship is a never ending process
Keep in mind that just because you're already in a relationship with her doesn't mean the courtship already ended. It is actually a never ending process. To be able to keep the relationship going, you still have to woo and romance her. The affection you showed her during the courtship stage should still be present even when you're married and already with children. Keep the courtship going to make the relationship last long.