It all starts with the first look, transitions into one person asking the other out on a date, love enters, it being expressed... Then comes a magical proposal followed by marriage. Well, that may be the happily-ever-after shown in most movies and dramas, but that’s often not the end of a story in real life. In fact, it could be seen as the beginning of one.
There’s always an initial relaxation and a deep sense of love right after tying the knot of marriage, but there’s always the worry of the magic slipping away one day. Frankly, it’s a pretty realistic fear, and a lot of couples experience it in the early stages of their married life.
It’s important to understand that a relationship can never be finalized as a ‘success’ on some particular day, it’ll always remain a continued work in progress, with all its natural ups and downs on the way. The magic needs to be kept alive, and that’s the beauty of it too. The tips in this article are meant to genuinely help you in rekindling the flame of pure love that you once felt.
The meaning of loving each other
One of that factors that made it pretty challenging to accurately describe the meaning of love in words, is that it’s far from being objective in nature. It’s supplied and received in many ways through different people, and a singular all-encompassing definition for it cannot be finalized that easily. However, some relatable aspects of love are felt by everyone who has ever loved someone, as the feelings of lovers are mutual, even when their definition of it may differ.
Some may say, to understand another person completely, is love. In other words, if someone just gets you, and makes an effort to take care of you through that genuine understanding, that’s termed as love. It’s the name of always being there for someone, and helping them be the best version of themselves effortlessly.
When you truly love someone, you see them with you in the future, standing by you until your last breath. Which means, you’ve accepted them to accompany you until you die, with all their faults and errors as loveable traits of their personality. It’s a connection that can be felt mutually between two people, and it’s always there to make your life far better.
10 Tips and Advices to love each other more
1. Fight the urge to deal with your partner critically
It’s highly possible that your partner has done or will do something that’ll end up hurting you, and they may not even say they’re sorry. The worst part is, they may do it continuously, even when you’ve told them that it’s annoying to you. It’s understandable if you dislike them for it, but instead of magnifying their mistakes, take steps to solve the problem through serious dialogue. They probably had those qualities when you first fell in love with them, you can change them now. Just switching the critical lens with a loving one can solve numerous problems.
2. Show them kindness
Continuing from the previous point, kindness is a much better approach then being critical. Sure, it may require patience and a ton of acceptance, but it’s the key to keeping the love alive between partners. The more love you show them through kind acts towards them, the stronger the positive vibe will be between you two. It can soften your loved one even in the toughest situations.
3. Torch the bad memories
The past can’t hurt you any longer, unless you allow it to. Bad memories should have no place in your mind if you’re looking to strengthen the bond between your significant other. Torch the grudges, and remember their traits that made you fall in love with your partner. If you’re struggling to let memories go, write them down and burn the pages; be done with those memories once and for all. If you’ve decided to have a happier relationship, it’s time to filter your memories.
4. Take Time-outs
Humans have an innate quality of hating to lose, in any situations. This rule sadly applies to arguments and fights between married couples as well. We often forget though, the person you’re trying to ‘defeat’ is probably the most important influence in your life currently, shouldn’t we just let it go sometimes? Consider taking time-outs, that’s the wise way to deal with it. You can always come back to the topic later, with cooler minds and calmer moods.
5. The art of asking nicely
It’s unbelievable how quickly a simple request can be misinterpreted as sarcasm or nagging, especially when it’s between married individuals. The solution to this is to keep your requests short, sum it up in about two to three sentences. This allows you to be assertive without sounding a bit aggressive. Use a polite tone and limit your sentences so that your point is communicated before the attention span of your partner ends. Smile with it, and encourage them with sincerity.
6. Identify the issues
Sit down with your significant other and analyze yourselves deeply, identify the parts that aren’t working properly and which roles aren’t being fulfilled. Imagine perfection and point out what’s missing from it. Create a plan together to get there, moving from your today’s reality towards a perfect future together. Just actions like this could be enough to tell them you care!
7. Treat yourself generously
Sure, marriage isn’t about nurturing oneself, but it’s about your focus towards your partner. But you can’t give what you don't have. Prioritize your needs and the activities that are essential for you function properly, such as social interaction, rest, meditation etc. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary. Your partner loves you, and they won’t find true happiness until you do as well.
8. Think about their positives
What did you partner win you over with? Was it their humor? Or their passion for what they do? Their charming looks? Remind yourself about what drew you in towards this bond, and consciously look for the positives in your partner. This will help you accept their flaws too, ultimately helping in nurturing your relationship. This brings us to the next point!
9. No one is perfect, literally
No matter who you married, one thing is for sure, there’s no chance that you would have found them to be absolutely perfect for you. Because perfection isn’t one of the traits of the human nature, however, acceptance and patience are. It’s important to realize that if you love them, you’ll have to accept them along with their occasional mess-ups and flaws, because they might be keeping up with some of yours as well. Be more open towards acceptance, it’ll help the marriage out a lot.
10. Plan fun outdoor activities
Once you’re at peace and in a state of happiness with each other at home, it’s important to enhance the positive vibes through planned activities that you guys mutually enjoy. Something that reminds you of the past perhaps? A specific bowling alley could bring back tons of memories about pre-marriage days, try some of that, you can’t go wrong with such ideas.
Quotes that shouts about loving each other
“If I had a flower for every time thought of you… I could walk through my garden forever.” – Alfred Tennyson
Who wouldn’t be absolutely in awe on hearing this from their significant other? Tremendous expressions of love, like this one, can make one moment eternal.
“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow–this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” – Elizabeth Gilbert
This quote encapsulates the beauty of absolute acceptance that comes with love, that’s the most unbelievable part of it. You willfully choose to look over someone’s flaws for the rest of your life, just because you’d prefer being with them to anything else.
“Where there is love there is life.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Love is a basic need for humans; the act of making love itself is the cause of life as we know it. It’s a remarkable quote!
Marriage is a commitment to live together through thick and thin, to fight through the worst of times and grow old with each other, holding hands until the final breath. If that commitment still holds true in your heart, you and your partner should do everything in your power to keep it alive and well. You know you’ll be with them for the rest of your life, you might as well make an effort to make it as beautiful and majestic as possible, right? We hope this article has helped you in doing just that, all the best!