No Sex: Are You Asexual or Having Sexual Anorexia?
You are not a nun or monk when you think sex is undesirable
Jan 22, 2020
What Is Asexual?
Source: Redbubble
Every aspect of your life is getting on well. Anything you have ever dreamed of is right in front of you. Nothing physical is missing, be it a new house, a successful career, and even caring friends and family. Yet, only one major thing is missing!
Typical opinions about sexual orientation have been gradually changing in recent years to contain the term asexual. Therefore, the provocative question in everyone’s mind is; who is an asexual person? In short form - an ‘Ace.’
Well, in simple terms, asexual is someone who doesn’t have any feelings; emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction. One lacks interest in sex.
Identifying someone having asexual is not easy unless you get intimate. A brief guide to spotting out specific personalities is here.
You must wonder why some partners keep off sex-related matters. Do you fear to have sex? Could it be a case of asexual or sexual anorexia? Well, look no further for about it, as all that you should know about asexual and sexual anorexia is right here.
Sexual anorexia and asexual are both entirely separate words. Whereby one deals with avoidance and addition to while the other is about lacking sexual pull. Discussion on the two terms seems not to end soon. Neither will research stop. A new review publication is out; updated findings and solutions come out to help those affected.
Who Is The Target?
Asexual and anorexia targets both women and men. Therefore, anyone can suffer from this condition. However, in most cases, men are most. Why? That’s one headache that researchers are trying to figure out.
Addiction to sex is still under stigmatization in our society and culture, although it has gained recognition in public. There is less talk from people on the other sensitive terms. Some of these are asexual and sexual anorexia. To some people, it’s embarrassing, while to others, it’s okay to mention.
Whether you are experiencing asexual or anorexia, stigma should not be part of the problem, facing it with positive and robust confidence is the way to go.
Therefore, there is no need to shy off should you find yourself in any of this situation. Even though you might have never heard of these two terms before, then know they have been around for some decades. First, let’s kick off by defining what exactly is asexual and how you can tell if you have it.
Asexual Characteristics
Asexual people have sex but there is no sexual attraction towards their partner, or they have a relationship with somebody who isn’t asexual. They don’t get aroused/have fantasies/masturbate. Some of them feel no drive at all. Although for those who masturbate, term it as something relaxing and not sexual.
Asexual persons aren’t introverted or shy but they are usually not comfortable being in public places that look quite sexualized. They date other people. Some of them prefer sex as a compromise. That’s why a relationship can work out when one dates someone who isn’t asexual.
Some people argue that for an orientation to happen, it must point in a particular direction. However, a lack of sexual need is a disorder or sickness in the medical world. Keep reading to find more on this exciting topic.
Is Asexual A Disorder?
The nature of asexual is a critical topic that scientists keep debating for years. Some argue that its asexual dysfunction, while others classify it as a mental disorder. There is also a section that feels it’s an unusual sexual interest, yet others consider it a sexual orientation. So, how about you, which is it?
Asexual is not a mental disorder according to most data, is it neither a disorder nor a symptom. What of asexual dysfunction? No, because research shows asexual person feels no distress when they lack sexual desire. The study also indicates that sexual arousal isn’t weak in asexual persons.
The University of British Columbia researchers reviewed evidence of asexual. The book ‘Archives of Sexual Behavior’ is now available online but soon for publication. They concluded that asexual isn’t a disorder or a psychiatric condition. Instead, it fits in the category of a distinct sexual orientation.
Therefore, to sum it all up, asexual is neither a disorder nor a dysfunction. So, if you are an asexual person, relax, as there is no need to panic about your ‘Mother Nature’ condition.
What Is Sexual Anorexia?
Most victims of sexual abuse can tell you sexual anorexia is real. Here is why. There is that fear of intimacy, to a point where any activity concerning sex brings them bad memories. Therefore, they tend to shy off from any intimate relationship or just any close affairs that can result in a sex act.
To break it down, ‘anorexia’ is a disorder where people deprive themselves of food on purpose. Therefore, in that case, then, what is sexual anorexia? Sexual anorexia is also an intention of starvation of some sort.
It’s a pathological aversion and fear of any romantic or sexual activity. Such persons have severe worries around them, mostly concerning sexual acts. For example, if you have a low libido, you may need to check your sexual anorexia behavior.
Here we go with some common signs to know if you are suffering from sexual anorexia.
Sexual Anorexia Symptoms
- Having tremendously low or no sex drive
- Excess fear of acquiring STIs
- Having a strong shame post-sex
- Having a negative view of sex
- Obsessive self-doubt
- Showing signs of strange behavior to evade sex
There you have it, next time you feel insecure or lack a sense of safety on sex, refer to these symptoms. Just like an eating disorder, sexual anorexics too starve themselves of sexual needs. They prefer to switch off their lives to the world of sex to escape physical or emotional upset. Unlike asexual, sexual anorexia is a disorder of avoidance!
“A person tries to play safe,” says Marissa Nelson - a licensed family, sex, and marriage therapist from Washing, DC.
Difference Between Asexual And Sexual Anorexia
Are you thirsty to know why your partner would not want to have sex? Then, it may interest you to read the ‘Tales from a sex-starved wife.’ The story tells how this starved wife combed through various books and articles for answers. To find out what happened next, grab a copy today.
When defining the two behaviors, there is a vast difference. Here is how. Asexuality is lacking sexual interest or attraction to any sexual act. Some consider it a lack of sexual orientation. A person with asexual is naturally born in that way, thus, not a psychological disorder.
You will not find evidence of any underlying cause of asexuality. However, it depends on the way someone is, as nothing causes it. One can label a few natural aspects as the reasons behind asexuality in an individual. These include the natural state of someone, sexual dysfunction, and lack of enough sex opportunities.
On the other hand, sexual anorexia is a lack of appetite for having sex. For better terms, they starve themselves from intimacy. Here is an example, in an intimate relationship; one may have the fear, thus resulting in finding an escaping route or evading sex.
Many things may drive a person to lose sex interest from time to time.
Some causes of sexual anorexia may be physical, such as medication use, exhaustion, and hormone imbalance. Emotional problems can also contribute to this condition, and these are sexual abuse, depression, power imbalance from both partners, and rape.
Should you suspect your partner of showing signs of the two conditions, refer them for some counseling.
What you feel for your partner is a sexual attraction or sexual tension? Find out from these 25 signs below whether your sexual appetite is out of control.
Summary
To wind up, it’s clear that there is a primary distinction between the two terms. Sexual anorexia is the abstinence that is motivated by self-loathing and fear. While asexual doesn’t desire sex and they don’t want it for whatever reason. There you go, since you can now differentiate between the two terms, check if their descriptions fit you!
Are you showing any signs of asexual or sexual anorexia, as mentioned earlier? Then, why wait. Don’t let your fear lead you to fall under the category of either of the two. If any is bringing harm to you, seek professional or medical. Visit your doctor and settle any worries you may have.