Cougars: Are They Easier to Date Than Younger Girls?

Will cougars give you an easier time than younger girls in dating?

By Evelyn
Cougars: Are They Easier to Date Than Younger Girls?

The Allure of Cougars

This is a question for all the young men out there reading this, any of you attracted now or in the past to a cougar? What is or was the allure for you? These days who hear and see more and more stories about mature women dating younger men that you would think is kind of a trend, and according to science, this shouldn't happen at all. Men shouldn't really be attracted to older women, why? Well, because evolution has prepared men to like healthy and fertile women... so why are so many men dating cougars?

If you're not sure if you're dating a cougar, here is a definition to make it clear. A cougar is usually defined as an older woman attracted primarily to younger men, this usually includes having a sexual relationship. No precise ages are defined but the lady has to be 35 or older and you'll have to be at least 8 years younger than her.

Before we get to the reasons why cougars are so alluring to younger men, let us have a little history. The first documented use of the term "cougar" as it is known now, was in the locker room of the Canadian ice hockey team, the Vancouver Canucks in the 1980s. The team used the term to refer to all the women who attended their hockey games who pursue them sexually when the game was over. Since then many dating sites have appeared assisting establishing this kind of relationships, the first one being the Canadian site, launched in 1999, This site was the focus of an investigation by Canadian reporter from the Toronto Sun, Valerie Gibson who then wrote a book called "Cougar: A Gude for Older Women Dating Younger Men."

Source: @richoldwomen/Instagram

Let's get back to our question, what's the allure of a cougar to you young men? Here are some reasons according to men who have dated or are dating a cougar.

Life experience

Life experience is something very valuable, older women have become wiser and can cope better in difficult situations. Young men are attracted to this. All that life experience is very attractive to younger men because they feel they can learn a lot from the older women they're dating. Cougars become their rocks. They know things that younger girls haven't experience yet. This life experience embarks various "departments", one is what happens inside the bedroom. 

There's much you can learn

All that experience they've already accumulated can translate into something teachable, and that's alluring to younger men. This especially applies to younger men who are ambitious and want to expand their minds intellectually. The maturing process of a young man speeds a little when dating a cougar because he can learn a lot from her. Their life experience's with different types of men can help you because she can easily point out what flaws you can turn into opportunities for growth. She sees potential.

They don't play games

Older women are wiser, and they know what they want. If they want a fling, that's what they look for, if they want a relationship then they look for the guy that can provide that for them. That stability is very alluring to younger men because they know where they stand with them. 

Cougars command respect for their achievements

Most older women have achieved through hard work, dedication, and persistence... success. Younger men attracted to older women respect that because they know how difficult it is to get there and maintain that status. They also recognize that older women are capable of juggling many responsibilities. They have a career, they manage a home, the children, socializing, fitness, They wear many hats and they do all this very diligently, and that is very attractive to young men. It also gives them a sense of security.

Emotional maturity

Young people aren't skilled at controlling emotions, but since older women have been through ups and downs in their lives, they have learned to control their emotions. You'd think that this makes them boring but, for younger men,  this is alluring because they know how to enjoy life and make the most of it. No mind games with cougars, they are upfront when something is not right and they tell it how they see it.

Why Cougars are Easier to Date

Whether cougars are easier to date or not will depend on what you're looking for dating one. All in all, they are easier to date than younger girls for these reasons. Take into consideration that each situation and each woman is different so don't assume this applies to you too, but in general and according to some surveys, dating a cougar is easier because they are great partners among other important factors.

Older women are self-assured

Cougars, according to men that have dated them are self-assured and that makes dating them easier because a self-assured woman doesn't allow anyone to mislead her, is not afraid to show her feelings, she knows how to set boundaries and when to say no, is not afraid to ask for help and that show strength, she is comfortable being alone, and she takes charge of her decisions and their consequences. 

Cougars are self-confident

She doesn't just go with the flow, she knows what works for her and what doesn't. when she says "yes" is because she really means it, she uses positive words to build herself up as well as others around her. she has clear goals and plans to achieve them, she displays a confident body language, she knows her strengths and weaknesses, she knows the importance of self-care. All this can give inspiration.

Cougars are sharp conversationalists

You can have great conversations with an older woman because she knows how to listen and when she doesn't know what you're talking about she's not afraid to say it. she has more experience in life than you so you can talk about many subjects. You won't have to rake your brain to come up with things to talk about to keep the conversation going.

Why Cougars are Not Easier to Date

Dating a cougar is the fantasy of many young men out there and, as established, it has its allure but it can also not be easy. All romantic relationships have their ups and downs, their pros and cons and dating a cougar could also come with some risks or downsides that you need to consider too. 

Mean and hurtful comments from other people

You don't live in a bubble and even though younger men dating older women is more common these days, there are still people that frown upon it and will occasionally make mean or sarcastic comments about the fact you're dating a cougar. It doesn't get easier if the relationship turns serious so you need to be prepared for that.

Her baggage

We all have a past and it comes with baggage. Some people have more baggage than others and that may be the case of the older woman you're dating. If you're not conscious of this, then dating a cougar will not be easy because that baggage is part of her life and it will affect your relationship whether you want to or not.

Different Lifestyles

Sometimes the age gap could become a problem and not make things easier for your dating scene with a cougar. You could have different interests and passions, maybe she's not into partying every night and you are. Or maybe she has kids and can not be available whenever you like. Your hobbies may not be the same... you either find a common ground or dating her could prove really difficult and at the end not worth it.

How Do I Know if I will Enjoy the Company of a Cougar?

Since dating a cougar could prove difficult, you'll enjoy her company if you follow some rules. Take a look.

1. Avoid talking about the age difference as much as possible

Both of you know that she's older than you, so why talk about it. You need to focus on having fun and enjoying the time you spend together. You can constantly show her physically and verbally that the age gap is meaningless and it's even a positive thing.

2. Don't try to impress her with money

Money isn't the reason she'll be involved with you (or is involved with you). Usually, financial stability is something they have achieved already, so they won't be impressed if you start flaunting your money.

3. Show her you can be the captain of your own life

Show her traits of your personality that she'll find attractive. Show her you're driven, that you are confident, that you have ambitions, that you valued her, that you're decisive, and that you can take charge too. This will keep her interested in you beyond the physical and you'll be able to enjoy her company more.

Related Article: 8 Reasons Men Don’t Tell On Why They Love Cougar Women!
8 Reasons Men Don’t Tell On Why They Love Cougar Women!

Why men are so hushed about their desire to get older women


Cougars are easier to date than younger girls because they are emotionally intelligent, they are self-assured and confident and you can learn a lot from them. All that is very alluring. Be mindful that dating a cougar could also be risky because the age gap could mean different interests and lifestyles that are bound to collide sometime in the course of the relationship. Enter a relationship with a cougar with your eyes wide open and knowing the rules, that way you'll be able to enjoy the experience a take some knowledge with you when things end. 


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