Ezra Miller's Sexual Orientation: 'Queer' Instead Of Gay

Before beginning the post about The Perks Of Being A Wallflower famed Ezra Miller’s sexuality or sexual orientation, there are two things that I would like to enlighten my readers about. The very famous Ezra Miller, about who I am sure most of you are aware of and the word that has gained the fame again ‘Queer.' So, let’s start with the meaning of the word queer.

Queer is an umbrella term, i.e., a phrase used for covering a wide array of concepts belonging to a common category. This one is used for the minorities of sexual and gender who are not heterosexual or cisgender. The original meaning of queer is strange or peculiar. It mostly came into use in the 19th century as a slur for same-sex desires or relationship.

Ezra Matthew Miller doesn’t need an introduction. The man rose to fame with the movie Afterschool in 2008, and then he made his ever-rising career with the drama We Need To Talk About Kevin in 2011 and the adaption The Perks Of Being A Wallflower in 2012. He is also known for the comedy film Trainwreck. But his most memorable characters have been that of Barry Allen, i.e., The Flash in the DC Extended Universe and Batman Vs. Superman: The Dawn Of Justice and Credence Barebones in Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them. His net worth is estimated to be over $500,000. When he was six, he learned opera for overcoming his speech impairment. He has sung for the Metropolitan Opera and has also performed in the American premiere of Philip Glass’s opera White Raven. Ezra doesn’t have any category of ideal man or woman in his mind. He has mostly dated women older than him. Hence, it can be clearly derived that age doesn’t matter to him. He has also come out as a man to who sexuality doesn’t matter either. According to him, he falls in love with whoever and whenever he wants. It could be a girlfriend or a boyfriend for him. He does not set himself to the standards of gender or sexual orientation.

In an interview with Shana Naomi Krochmal for Out Magazine, Ezra Miller talked about his sexuality and simply said ‘he is queer.' He wouldn’t specify himself as gay. He had gay moments, but he had been attracted to females mostly. He had also admitted that he liked kissing boys when he was younger. Quoting Ezra Miller by his words in his interview:

The Perks Of Being A Wallflower famed Ezra Miller admitting he is queer isn’t strange, what’s strange is he has admitted at all. He was very young and like lightning in a bottle. But does that mean he is confused about his sexual orientation or saying he is queer and not gay means he does not want to be open about it? Miller accepts having a few gay experiences, having a boyfriend, the happy sleepovers in his early youth, the time of his explorations as he said. He thinks those who never had a gay experience is trying to avoid the reality of life. Even today, Ezra Miller keeps his options open and his spectrum broad. He has accepted being in love with a few girls, so that makes him ‘Queer’ and not just gay. But that suggests nothing about his future, and he has admitted that himself. Miller’s statement has left a significant impact on a lot of young people. Although, he says he never gave it a spectacular amount of thought and yet he was sure that’s how he wanted to come out or identify himself and not as gay. Ezra Miller doesn’t want to conform to the binary system of the sexual orientation of the society, about who and how everyone loves.

Actor Ezra Miller says that the term is generational in many ways. He said that the word is newly available in a certain way. However, it would be better to say that it has been brought back to life now, after the 19th century. To Miller, the term feels more open and inclusive. That’s one reason he thinks it applies to him personally.

He also said that there are many who falls in this broad category. He and his friends use that term comprehensively and for every human being. According to him, one should always be curious about who they love and everything that is involved in that love. Boyfriend or girlfriend shouldn’t matter much. For the world, he has come out as a gay, but for him, it is the independence to love.

He has been in love with women mostly but has been with many people. He is open to love wherever it can be. He has a lot of really wonderful friends of different sexes and genders. He is very much in love with no one in particular.

Is being a gay or Queer, as Ezra Miller states, a big deal today? I think we all know the answer. These days, even when many are still closeted about their sexual orientation, to come out with a different preference, i.e., a guy having a boyfriend and not a girlfriend shouldn’t really be making a headline. Although there are many Hollywood actors who have openly admitted being of a different sexual orientation, it is still a stigma if an actor or an actress is not straight. That is one reason why they are still secretive about their sexual orientation. They are scared about the ramification to their careers. There is still a subsection of people who think a gay can’t play the role of straight characters convincingly. However, there have many excellent examples to prove that notion wrong. Who can imagine the womanizing Neil Patrick Harris in How I Met Your Mother is actually a gay. Ellen Page can be taken as the other stunning example. The list can go on, and these are just the ones who have come out openly about their sexuality. There are still many who are not comfortable in declaring their sexual orientation. The reason why Ezra Miller calling himself queer has become the talk of the town is that of people with a mindset like Author Bret Easton Ellis. And it was because of this mentality that Matt Bomer as questioned as the potential Christian Grey in ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey.’ It is a shame we keep forgetting there are roles of gay that have been played well by actors with straight preferences as well. One doesn’t need to be gay to play gay and hence, one shouldn’t need to be straight to play straight. Then why the entire issue? When the actor's act, they are not acting themselves, they live the character. Actors entirely become someone else when they act a role. And that is one important reason why the sexual orientation of an actor shouldn’t really matter. Miller is one of the those few open queer celebrity in Hollywood and salutes to Ezra Miller for coming out and accepting his true self. Not many can do what he has done- not being ashamed of his sexual orientation. It is a record that even after openly accepting his sexuality, Miller was portrayed as a superhero in the major motion picture. And we can say he has played the muscle well.

The first girlfriend that Miller had was in 2006 named Esther Wald. Since she wasn’t a celebrity hence, there is nothing much about her. Ezra Miller was thirteen then while Esther was three years older to him. They parted ways in the same year. In 2010, he dated a model and an actress Zoë Kravitz. They had met on the set of Beware The Gonzo. It was Ezra Miller’s first film as a lead and Zoe was his co-star. This relation was short lived as well, and not much was talked about it. From June 2011 to 2012, he dated 23 years old Lauren Nolting while he was just 18. Lauren was an American Photographer. This was the time when Miller was getting prominent films like We Need To Talk About Kevin and The Perks Of Being A Wallflower. His tight schedule didn’t go well with the couple, and they parted ways. From 2013 to 2016, he dated five years older Erin Urb. They were each other’s regular date at the red carpet events. However, they never revealed any detail about their relationship. They even got engaged sometime in 2015, but it didn’t go well, and they parted ways. What adds to Ezra Miller’s queerness is that he was married to actor Johann Urb from 2007 to 2010. But it seems like it didn’t work out as well. It could be because Miller is never too much involved with anyone or anything apart from his career.

Miller has dated many and is not yet ready to settle down. But he does want to get settled eventually. He enjoys dating, and he thinks that the ideal situation of dating is even both parties enjoys each other’s company. Ezra Miller is glad that he has identified himself as queer because he thinks ultimately when the identity is being created for presenting to the world, it should be closer to the identity maintained in the personal life. It will end up being more sustainable and comfortable. Media received the statement of Miller being queer with a lot more enthusiasm than required, Heterosexual, Bisexual, Lesbian, Gay or Queer; a person shouldn’t be judged by the kind of relationship he prefers. Whatever said and done, the statement has made Erza Miller a hero, an icon among the youth, someone who is not ashamed of his sexual orientation.