Spanking My Husband: 7 Reasons Why This is So Gratifying

Adding to your sex repertoire: the woman spanking the man

By Kazuko Otsuka
Spanking My Husband: 7 Reasons Why This is So Gratifying

Is Spanking a Form of Fetish?

The world of sex can not be fully understood overnight. It lives in a strange little bubble where fantasies and things you can’t do in the everyday world exists. You have different kinks, domination plays, fetishes, and the list goes on. Think about the most vanilla person you’ve ever met, and even they have thought about doing bizarre things in bed. 

An interesting behavior to look into is spanking. No, this is not the same spanking a parent does to their child for misbehaving. This is the kinky spanking that takes place in low-lit bedrooms at night when the kids are asleep. The kind of spanking that gets you moaning and uttering sounds you could never have imagined yourself doing in your lifetime. This is the spanking that most people don’t want to admit doing or having it done on them because, well, it’s embarrassing. 

Is spanking a form of fetish? Yes, it is. A fetish can be described as a form of sexual desire where gratification highly rests on an abnormal object or activity. It can be a piece of clothing, a part of the body, or sexual activity that causes excitement. Basically, if it’s weird, it’s probably a fetish. The most common fetish many people are aware of is foot fetish. Spanking is also considered one and becomes even more exciting when the woman is doing the spanking to the man. 

Like talking dirty to your spouse or partner, spanking helps rekindle that sexual excitement lost through time. If you are not happy with your current sex life and want to spice things up and don’t know where to begin, you’ve come to the right place. In the bedroom, spanking does not hold the same meaning as punishment in other situations. There will be some pain involved, but the excitement and embarrassment that comes after are worth that little sting. 

7 Reasons Why Spanking My Husband Is So Gratifying?

1. You Feel in Control

Not to be sexist, but we are all aware that there exists a general idea that men are supposed to be in charge of everything, including sex decision making. Of course, this is not the case for all relationships, but many do suffer from this power dynamic. Spanking your husband is gratifying because you get to show him who’s boss without hurting his pride. The act of hitting him (lightly or hard) in the behind gives you, the woman, a sense of power. It’s a win-win situation for both parties involved. 

2. Lets You Manage Your Differences

If you've ever found yourself in a place where your husband's misbehaving keeps piling up and you're lost on what to do to fix them as nothing works, get spanking. In this light, your spanking lets you release your bitterness towards him without feeling any form of rejection from his end. Dissatisfied wives are a force to be reckoned with that no husband wants to be face-to-face. 

However, make sure to talk things through with your partner and not only rely on spanking during sex. You might end up getting addicted to the feeling and resort to this method all the time. 

3. Helps You Embrace Happiness

Before you put down this article, hear us out. Spanking your husband is gratifying because it makes you and him happy. Period. Every time you gently or forcefully contact your partner’s behind, you release dopamine, more commonly known as the feel-good hormone. Are you feeling sad and depressed? Get spanking. 

4. Tunes Out Noisy Thoughts

If you’re an over-thinker and have to tell yourself multiple times a day to calm down and relax, you will definitely find spanking gratifying. The act of spanking for pleasure puts you in this zone where everything else becomes still, and the only thing you can see and do is the act in front of your eyes or your hands. Spanking your husband is not only pleasurable for him, but also for you who tends to overthink. You get minutes of a clear mind apart from the occasional moans you hear from your partner. 

5. Giving Pleasure Unconventionally is Exciting

It’s always exciting to try new things, especially in the bedroom. If you’re the couple that has only been sticking to one position since you got married, anything diverting from that is exciting. As the wife, being the one in command, giving this new form of pleasure gives you a new feeling. Seeing your husband’s reaction to each spank also turns you on. 

6. Helps You Get Past Childhood Issues

This one is a tough cookie. Sometimes, the one doing the spanking finds the whole ordeal gratifying because it helps them move on from childhood trauma. If you were spanked as a child, and find yourself never moving on from that, maybe you see the whole act differently as an adult. Spanking your husband helps you get over your past. 

7. Easy Entrance to BDSM

If you’re the more open to bondage and dominance play in the bedroom and can’t get your husband into it, then spanking is the most accessible entryway. Doing this with your husband allows you to do a bit of BDSM without his knowledge. Exciting, right? 

Top 3 FAQs For Getting Into Spanking

1. How Do I Mention My Fetish to A New Date?

Mentioning any fetish you have to a new date is scary and nerve-wracking to anyone. Will they hate me? Will they think I’m weird? Will this be our last date? Hold your horses there, partner, and let’s look at this situation one at a time. 

First, you need to prepare yourself for any form of rejection. Before you even endeavor to open up to your date, prepare yourself for the worst. So when the worst does come (let’s hope not), you won’t be hit that badly, but you’ll be able to move on. 

Next, slowly introduce the topic. The best way to talk about these kinds of things is by preparing the receiver for what’s to hit them. You can’t suddenly open the date with a, “So, hey, I have a foot fetish… Is that okay?” It might work for some people, but trust us, most of the time, you’ll be labeled as a weirdo. The best method to go about this is to slowly build-up the conversation by asking non-direct questions like, “Do you have any kinks you want to try in bed?” or maybe a “What’s the craziest thing you and your partner did in your last relationship in bed?” 

Once you have the topic going in this direction, you can hit them with your fetish. Who knows, maybe they have their own and were just shy to bring it up themselves. 

2. How Do I Get My Partner to Try This (And Not Freak Out)

If you’ve been doing the same sex routine for years, it gets difficult to try new things. Sometimes, it’s not a matter of you don’t want to try, but more of you both don’t have the energy and gusto to do it- so you end up sticking to the same routine. 

To get your partner to try spanking and not get them freaking out, you need a lot of communication. Talk to your partner and tell them how you’ve been getting bored in bed and how you want to rekindle that excitement. Tell them that it’s beneficial for both parties and, most importantly, reassure them that they won’t get hurt. 

Always have a safe word when you’re doing acts that involve any pain. In the heat of the moment, people tend to lose themselves and hurting their partner, so make sure you have a safe word that will cease the whole act. If you have these boundaries set, wait until your partner is ready. It will take some time; not everyone is as adventurous and willing to try new things in bed, so understand this and patiently wait. 

3. Is There Aftercare Involved?

After a steamy session that took a sudden turn to “bruising lane,” necessary aftercare should be followed. There’s no need to go through this trouble if the spanking did not hurt and only left you with red buttocks, but if a ladle or other spanking instruments other than a hand were used, then make sure to apply some creams and ice to the bruised parts. 

Be careful not to get into the activities that you’re already inflicting pain on your partner, and they’re not getting any pleasure from it. It’s all fun and games until someone gets really hurt. 

Find My Tribe Who Are Into Spanking Their Husband

It’s always nice to talk and find people with the same interests as yours—unconventional interests, like spanking husbands. The easiest way to find groups near you that are into this fetish is by searching the web. Here is one Facebook group that likes to share memes on spanking husbands. All the people in the group have the same fetish as you do, so you can feel safe to voice out your thoughts without being judged. 

There are more groups similar to this one, and all it takes is a little digging to find them. You might even be lucky and find meetups and group discussions on it. 

Related Article: The Art of Erotic Spanking: How to Spank Your Partner Right
The Art of Erotic Spanking: How to Spank Your Partner Right

As kinky as it sounds, it might be a new favorite for you!


Don’t feel bad for finding satisfaction in spanking your husband. It’s normal human behavior that many feel but is too scared to come out. Instead of feeling bad about yourself, be happy, and accept the emotions and enjoy the excitement. Repressing your inner desires is never a good habit to keep. Let them out and enjoy life!