Top 15 Benefits Of The No Contact Rule After Breakup
If you are going through a break up phase, follow the no-contact rule and you will notice how easily you get over your past relationship.
Jul 24, 2018
Is it really necessary to maintain no contact after a break up?
Psychology says a person can be a lover from a friend, but he can't be a friend from a lover. In every relationship, one person is more emotional and he or she invests more than the other person. And when they decide to break up their relations, one person will surely suffer much more. It is very hard to let go of the person you thought of spending your life with forever. Your world falls apart and you feel quite terrible. That feeling can only be felt by you, not anyone else. You can share your problems with others but you can't share your pain. But, is this really the end of your world? Is this going to be worth suffering forever? No. You have to get up and you have to start your life again. It was just a bad phase of your life and you deserve the best, always. You have to move on with your life. Also remember, moving on is not that easy. Sometimes, you will miss them like hell, you would want to go back and make things normal again. You would be ready to do anything just to get them back in your life. But this is not the solution. If you guys broke up then it must be for a reason. Just focus on moving forward to a better life. The first step of this moving on process is to follow the no contact rule. Read these benefits of having no contact with your ex:
1.) You can easily move on if you follow the no contact rule after a break up
According to psychology, if you constantly bump into your ex lover, it will take much more time for you to move on from him or her. You will, again and again, remember the good times spent with them, you will start missing them, you will even think about contacting them. But you don't really want that again, right? Accept the fact that you are done with your relationship and you have to look forward now. Crying again and again over the same thing won't help you in moving on. But if you have made your decision and you are firm with it, you will find that after a period of time you will have moved on from them. Stop stalking them over their social media profile, delete their contact details, avoid contact with your mutual friends, and stop drunk texting them. In this way, you will find it easy to cope up with your breakup.
2.) You will get over your feelings.
It's hard to get over your feelings. It won't happen overnight, so accept the fact that it will take time. but don't lose the hope! Believe that you will get over them. But if you don't follow the no contact rule, you may find it difficult to overcome this phase. Your relationship might have ended but you will never be able to end your feelings. If you have been dumped by your ex, that person may have moved on while you're stuck in the past. You may still be in love with them and you'll find it difficult to get over these emotions. That's why it is important to follow the no contact rule to move on from him. Psychology says the more you avoid contact, the faster you'll move on from your ex.
3.) Healing is easy when you cut contact with your ex after breaking up
When you have made the decision to follow the no contact rule, your chance of healing from your past relationship will be very high. You can focus more on moving on with your life instead of getting back together with your ex. Contacting them, again and again, will never help you to get over your break up. You will always end up with the memories you shared together. Or worse, you even may want to contact them again to see if there is a chance of getting back together. But is this really worth it? You broke up for a reason. So if you have really made up your mind to move on with your life, then go for it. Don't look back. It's time to start a new beginning.
4.) You tend to forgive easily when you follow the no contact rule after a break up
Psychology says if you are not over your break up and you are repeatedly trying to get in contact with your ex, it might be difficult for you to forgive. The best solution to move on is to forgive yourself and your partner for all the mistakes you both committed during your relationship. Holding grudges leads you only to disappointment and depression. Be mature enough to face these situations. Don't blame all the bad things on another person. No one is perfect; everyone commits some mistakes and blaming them for everything is not a solution. You should forgive yourself for making the wrong decisions as well. We all are human and we learn from our mistakes. Making no contact with your ex-partner may help you in forgiving and forgetting your past. It will help you to let go of the negative feelings you had with them. If you don't try to avoid contact with them it will bring back all the bad memories with them, and you will think of all the worst things they did to you. That's why you must follow the no contact rule and forgive your past decisions.
5.) You make new memories when you keep no contact with your ex after the break up
When you are moving on with your break up, you begin to start a new chapter in your life. Psychology says you must focus on creating good and happy memories. You need to focus on the things that make you happy. You should not feel like you need to be dependent on any person for your happiness. You are enough for yourself and you will feel complete within yourself. You have to start being positive. But if an ex couple ignores the no contact rule, they will eventually come across each other and will never be able to get over the past relationship.
6.) It's a complete ending to your relationship with your ex
When two people forget about the no contact rule, they will always feel incomplete and end up going back to each other. They will always feel the need to be in a relationship, which is wrong. You really don't need to be in a relationship just for the sake of getting the fun benefits of it. To be in a relationship, you both need to understand each other. If you guys broke up, it was definitely for a reason. Don't try to get back into that situation where you lost your happiness. This will give you a worse feeling than ever. Accept the fact that you two were not destined to be together. If you follow through with the no contact rule, you will find easy to put a complete end to your relationship. Then you will find that you are much happier than before.
7.) You get rid from frustrations when you follow the no contact rule after break up
Getting sad feelings, again and again, is unavoidable. It's a natural part of moving on, even if you stick to the no contact rule. But if you don't do this, you may find out the real answer for why they left you. This will ultimately frustrate you greatly. Additionally, you will see their updates on social media with other people, seemingly having a good time, or even a happy picture with another person. This will for sure lead you to disappointment. Just ask yourself this: how do you really feel when you talk to him? Do you really get the same feeling from him like when you were on good terms? The answer is NO, you DON'T. Just move on from him now. His chapter in your life is over and you have to follow this no contact rule for the good of yourself and for your future.
8.) Lets you give yourself some "me" time
When you follow the no contact rule, you begin to spend some quality time with yourself. You get to know what you really want from yourself and what you want in life. You begin to love yourself more, you start pampering yourself, and the most important part, you are not dependent on anyone for your happiness. You are self-dependent, emotionally and mentally. But if you still try to reach out to your ex, it means you still are dependent on them. You still consider them to be the backbone of your life. Just ask yourself, if you are not self-sufficient how can you expect from others that they will keep you happy? Think about this!
9.) You have a new perspective when you are not in contact with your ex after the break up
After breaking up and going through mental trauma, depression is a natural thing. You will be in such a situation that you won't be able to figure out which steps to take next. Don't get too stressed about it. It happens to everyone. When you follow the rule of no contact, you get space from your partner, which provides mental clarity and helps you to figure out the solutions to your problem easily. Write down your thoughts on paper. It will help you to let go of all the feelings. You can ask yourself such questions like: 1. Who is the most important person in your life? 2. What type of person you really want in a relationship? 3. What went wrong in the past relationship? 4. What were the qualities you hated the most in your partner? 5. What are the things you were not allowed to do while you were in the relationship? By asking these questions, you will get a clear perspective for your future. You will be more focused on the things you want to do and what you want from your life ahead.
10.) Lets you gain self respect and self confidence
If you are still trying to remain in contact with your ex, just remember that you are losing your self-respect. Loving someone is good, but not at the cost losing yourself and everything you have. It will only lead you to loneliness. Never ever put yourself in a situation where you have to beg someone to be with you. Always remember you can't force anyone to love you or to be with you. Psychology says," If someone wants to go, let them go! If they come back, then they're truly yours." If you follow the no contact rule, you will start to discover what you have lost just because of one person. You will realise how that one person changed you and finally, you will realise that they are not worth it. It was not worth it to lose yourself and your respect, no matter who caused it. You need to start working on yourself. Focus on those things which matter to you and the people who respect you.
11.) You get your strength and hope back.
The strength, the confidence, the hope you have lost while being in the relationship, you get it all back when you follow the no contact rule. You'll discover that you have new commitment to life, you have built your new boundaries and, most importantly, you have the strength to follow those boundaries. When your strength and your confidence are low, you tend to break those boundaries. You do the things which you do not want to. Is this a sign of being into a healthy relationship? Forget about others first. Do you respect yourself for making all the decisions you have taken? You and only you know the answer to this. This is the foremost reason that you should avoid all contact with your ex so that you are back on track again.
12.) Lets you have a clear mind and clear heart
When you don't follow the no contact rule, you will be stuck figuring out what you really want and what you don't want with your life. You won't have a clear state of mind - your heart says one thing and your mind says something else. You don't know if what you are doing is right or wrong. It may seem like life will go on like this forever. No. You have to stop this someday. On the other hand, when you start following the no contact rule, you will have a clear state of mind. You'll be clear about your goals and objectives in life. You know very well now what is good for you and what is bad for you. On the basis of that, you are strong enough to make your decisions. Your mind and your heart work together now, and you don't have to feel a raging battle between them.
13.) Life is happier when you follow no contact rule after a break up
When you are following the no contact rule, you can re-invent your life and create a new "YOU". You are living your life for yourself, not for any other people. When we are in a relationship, we always think of our partner. Would he or she like my outfit? Would he or she like my hairstyle? How am I looking today? These are the questions which always pop up in our mind. But when you are single, you are free from these thoughts. You can do whatever you want to do, you can dress the way you want to dress, you just have to impress yourself. You have all the time to pamper yourself, to find a new direction in life. You have started enjoying your own company and you have realized you don't need anyone to depend on for a happy life. You are well capable of it.
14.) You reconnect with your friends.
When you were in a relationship, all of your plans were dependent on your partner. You had to plan according to them and whether you liked it or not, they had to be there with you. Might be you were having your own girl gang plan or boys plan, but your partner was there with you. You were not able to do your own thing with your buddies. But now, since you're following the no contact rule after your breakup, you are getting more connected with your old friends. You have started hanging around with them more, partying all night, going to the movies or on shopping sprees. Whether you meet up with your long distance best friend or your friendly neighbour, whether it's your school or college classmates or office colleagues, you can enjoy every part of it.
15.) Lets you love someone else
When you are following the no contact rule, you are allowing yourself to get over your past relationship. You are ready to say bye to your dark past and hello to your bright future. You also allow love the second chance, since you accept that not everyone is same and one bad chapter in life doesn't mean your life is over. You have to live and love again. Life is waiting for you with more exciting surprises. You are ready to accept the new love in your life, you are ready to trust again, and you are ready to cherish those special moments from your new special someone.
One day for sure, you will overcome these feelings. However, remember this will happen only when you really want to move on from your past. If you are still in a dilemma, you need to figure out what you really want. Otherwise, you are going to hurt yourself again and again. If someone decides to leave, it's not your fault. You did every possible thing to be with them and still they left. It simply means they were not worth it. Always remember, everything happens for a good reason. Someone will definitely come for you and will shower you with all the love you were waiting for. I hope these points have given you more reason to move on in your life.