20 Signs It's Time To Leave The Relationship

Let no one deceive you into believing or accepting that all relationships entered into must be sustained and perhaps, lead to marriage. Some relationships are for a season, others are for a reason, only one is for a lifetime. It is not impossible that before you get into that one that is for a lifetime, others would have taught you some lessons. Ideally, if every one of us would listen to our guts and take the necessary precautions, most relationships we enter into would have been for a lifetime. Don't forget that relationships, at least in this instance, are used to depict the intimate association between a male and a female that is usually exclusive. It's good we set that record straight to avoid the error of universalism. Our guts, as used above, refer to the inner man which all human beings have. You see, there is a voice inside each one of us warning us when we are about to take a wrong step. As you make the decision to walk up to that girl or boy to propose to them, something deep down in you tells you whether they are right for you or not. It is the neglect of this natural instinct that often leads to broken relationships. But as it is, a broken relationship is by far better than a broken marriage. In marriage, the pain is greater and the consequences are more far-reaching. This is why you must not try to make your relationship work at all costs, especially when there are indications pointing to the fact that it is not meant to be.

Very few things happen to us in life without first giving us some signs. These signs are nature's ways of warning us against an impending danger. For a relationship you have to walk out of, any of the 20 signs highlighted below will surely manifest. Please note that each of these signs is enough to leave your current relationship, especially when they prove to be recurring. It is hoped that you would take the right step after going through them.

Respecting your opinion in this sense does not mean everything you say or suggest will always hold sway. No, it means your contributions, views, and opinions are usually sought, cherished, and welcomed when decisions of mutual effects are to be taken. That is, nothing is done without taking you into consideration. A relationship, amongst other things, is supposed to be for companionship. Where sincere love exists, all forms of caste and class should have no place. Partners are expected to see each other as equals and relevant to each other's success. However, when your relationship is such that instead of being a companion, you are being treated like an inferior, dear, it's time to leave. You are special and you deserve the best. There is no sense staying where your human dignity is no longer respected. The longer you stay in that relationship, the more damage is done to your self-esteem. Which will have its own set of consequences.

Abuse has indeed become prevalent in many homes today. But it didn't just begin after marriage. Most times, partners would have started noticing the tendency towards abuse within each other while they were still dating. Make no mistake, a man that lifts up his hands to slap you while you are still dating will do much more when you are married. Forbid yourself from thinking that he will change. Abusive folks don't change overnight. It takes a lot of effort and a special kind of grace for them to stop being abusive. If you don't envision your home being a boxing ring or a cemetery, it's better you leave now. Of course, no one is making the proposal that only men are abusive. Women can be equally so. As a matter of fact, most abuse these days isn't physical. Many forms of abuse are social, psychological, financial, and even sexual. But truth be told, men have a greater tendency to be physically abusive while in a relationship than women. If your partner sees you as an equal, they wouldn't take pleasure in abusing you. Unless a person is insane, he/she cannot inflict pain on someone they respect as much as they do him/herself. So, when you constantly receive such treatment from your significant other, it's a big sign that you need to leave. In fact, the earlier, the better.

So, your partner keeps sleeping around and keeps begging you to forgive them and you are still staying in the relationship? You'd better wake up. Serial infidelity is not a sign to be taken with levity regardless of whether you happen to be dating or married. An unfaithful partner will one day be the cause of the emotional death of their partner. And come to think of it, if a person loved you and found you attractive, do you think they'd cheat on you? I'm not talking about an occasional mistake, which many are guilty of, but something that has become a habit. Conversely, you may even be the one cheating in the relationship. Save yourself the shame of being discovered and simply leave the relationship. You are probably cheating because you don't love your partner anymore. Why not let go of the relationship and stick with the person your heart picks?

Addiction in whatever form is usually an outward expression of a personality disorder. Unless you are willing to cope with a chronic disorder your best decision, if you discover your partner has suddenly turned into an addict, is to leave the relationship. Recall that the basis for leaving would be that someone suffering from addiction is usually not willing to turn a new leaf. There is room for mistakes and that has been consistently stressed. But where the addict sees nothing wrong in what they are doing, you need no other sign for you to call it quits.

Where everything is okay in a relationship, there is absolutely no need for deception. Anything built on deception would have to be sustained by it. But the question is: to what extent can lies take you? The answer is obvious. How can you feel secure in a relationship in which your partner does the opposite of what they say? It breaches the trust that a successful relationship desires. And if there's no trust, the relationship would end anyway. However, before it gets to a point where irredeemable damage is done, it's better to leave.

A lazy hand is not only the devil's workshop but also poverty's haven. A person that has refused to work will eventually have to steal. Activity is the law of life and a person that refuses to work sooner or later, dies. Relationships that thrive in the face of challenges are those in which there is a give-and-take association. Where parasitism has set in because someone is willingly doing less than they are capable of, there is no way tension will not arise. Oftentimes, laziness is a small indicator of a bigger character problem. It spans all other aspects of human life. You surely don't want to be with a person who believes you must do all the work while they do all the spending.

Now let's make this clear. The fact that you are in a relationship does not mean you won't see someone else you feel attracted to. Everyone does. But then, this feeling is usually not too overwhelming for a someone in a "healthy" relationship. Not to be confused with polyamory, when you find yourself thinking more about another person more than your partner and you crave their attention more, what else are you waiting for? You don't love your partner anymore and leaving the relationship would be the best option for you.

In the heart of every healthy relationship is healthy communication. Partners that talk together, stay together. When you have found it hard to make time for each other, it can only be an indicator of friction between you both. If you are in a relationship with someone and you don't communicate for up to a month and no one is bothered, something is definitely not right. Yes, there may be some periods when someone just wants to be alone. Nevertheless, it shouldn't be too long. Reduction in communication between partners is usually the starting point of a break up. There comes a point when you have made several attempts to fix things and yet nothing seems to be coming out of it. You just might have kissed love goodbye. The best thing to do is to leave.

Selfishness may sound subtle or not too serious a reason for a break up, but the more you experience it, the more you realize how painful it is. It stings like a scorpion. Selfish partners only think about themselves and care less about others. This attitude can make a person sacrifice anything so long as it would gratify self. A selfish partner does not care if you have eaten so long as they are full. It doesn't bother them if you are sick as long as they are okay. You don't want to be with people like this, do you? Leaving and getting someone that thinks of you first, even before themselves, is the way out. That is where you can find joy and a sense of belonging.

Two people can hardly stay together for a long period of time without having some misunderstandings. It's normal. Even the best of couples fight. But the difference between couples that break up and those that stay together after a fight is the manner in which both handle it. Besides that, there is a particular frequency of fighting that is very alarming. When out of the 7 days that make a week, about 5 of them are spent fighting and settling issues, then that's a clear sign of incompatibility.

You wanting to be alone and the fact that you seem to be enjoying it, is a sign your relationship has failed. It suggests the connection is no longer there. Instead of enjoying your time together, you will only be enduring it. You probably were in that relationship in the first place because you dreaded being alone. Maybe you felt you needed someone who could wrap you up in their arms and watch your back for you. Now that you seem not to be getting all these and life seems to be easier when you are not with this person, why continue on a wrong path when a U-turn is possible?

The feeling of being secure is one that accompanies a healthy relationship. You stay together with your partner to 2am and you are not afraid. There is just a kind of inner peace that you cannot explain. That's when and if you are with the right person. By the time you start feeling insecure and uneasy about your partner, that is probably your inner man telling you that you are with the wrong person. You need not hesitate further in such a relationship, it is one that is not meant to be.

When everything that matters in your relationship is sex or other derivable benefits, do not hesitate to leave. A relationship is more than sex, it's not just about what you can get but more about what you can give.

As earlier stated, the relationships that work out and probably lead to a proposal, are not those that do not experience challenges or fights. Rather, they are those in which partners are willing and committed to making things work out. This commitment in some instances may require that one person gives up being 'right' and accepts responsibility for a deed. It may also mean that one person is willing to apologize and the other is willing to accept apologies when both may have wronged each other. If this willingness to shift ground and reach a compromise is not there, there is no reason the relationship should continue.

Of what use is a relationship that will not eventually lead to marriage? Why waste your time, energy, and perhaps, resources with a person who only sees you as a sex tool and who balks at the thought of making a proposal? Why be with someone who would not even pray to have you as their spouse? Though many people dream of the day they'll receive a proposal from their significant other, those in unhealthy relationships may never get the chance to experience it. While a proposal isn't the only thing to indicate dedication, it's an important step in traditional relationships. A proposal doesn't have to mean marriage per say either. Any indication of commitment will do if wearing a ring isn't something either of you want. If that's the case fine. But be sure to ask relevant questions and pay very close attention to your partner's demeanor. Once you can be sure your relationship has no future with him or her, do not waste your time any further. Call it quits straightaway, even if that may not be what you want.

Respecting a person can assume different forms. Though you both are in a relationship, it does not mean you can relate to each other. If your partner has made it a habit to talk you down in public just for the sake of having fun, you have no business remaining in the relationship any longer. Perhaps this should be put in another way: We don't humiliate people that matter to us in public for any reason. When someone you call your partner makes you a laughingstock in public, then they don't respect you and likely never will.

Everyone comes from somewhere. We all have parents who were instrumental in our existence. In most cases, they have more experience than us. If your parents express a strong disapproval to your relationship, it would be wise to end that relationship. Of course, this may not be absolute. There are some situations in which our parents can sincerely be misguided. They may be preventing us from moving on with certain people for personal reasons only. However, in most cases, they have their reasons for insisting that we cannot go with certain people. So, if your parents seem very serious and stubborn in their resolve that you cannot continue in a relationship with a particular person, regardless of your acclaimed love for that person, it would be better to call it quits.

If your partner wants you to reason the way they reason, believe everything they believe, and dislike the things they dislike, without even minding what your opinions are, you've got to think twice. They want you to mirror them and live a life that's theirs and not your own. You deserve an independent life of your own and you need not be coerced by anyone into becoming who you don't want to be. Therefore, when being in a relationship will make you be an extension of another person instead of being yourself, the best decision to take is to leave the relationship.

If you always look to the past because they have more good memories there than in the present, it may be a sign that your relationship has hit a deadlock. Most times, you find it hard to walk out of the relationship because of those good past memories. Don't get stuck in the past because it is past. Your present, as well as your future, is what matters. The fact that you don't enjoy the present as much as you did in the past may be a sign that you should leave.

Sex is a very important element of all relationships, marriage inclusive. Disaffection usually arises in homes when there are unmet expectations in the bedroom. If you know your partner has sexual defects which you don't see yourself coping with, leave.

When things go awry in a relationship, sometimes the fault may not be with the other person, it may lay with you. All through the signs mentioned in this piece, we have looked mostly at the other person with the assumption that you are exonerated. It definitely takes two to tango. Even if your partner has become abusive or unfaithful, it is not impossible that have had a hand in it. Therefore, before you leave your current relationship, be sure you are not the one with the problem. You can still leave if you aren't happy or if you don't feel safe, but if you're suppressing any underlying issues they will come to the forefront soon enough. Even if you leave and get hooked up with an angel, the problem will still persist. So, it's always better to do a self-assessment to get to know where the real fault is before and after every relationship.