Is Your Husband Flirting With Men? 7 Signs He Might Be Gay

There are a lot of gay men in straight relationships. As a wife, it is imperative that you know how to decode the telltale signs of your husband being gay.

By Auntrone89
Is Your Husband Flirting With Men? 7 Signs He Might Be Gay

Signs only portrayed by gay men

Winter break and still restless haha #gay #ink #instagay #mugshot #bed #bedroomeyes

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The crux of the matter is that a lot of men in straight relationships are gay, and for that particular reason, you are required to learn how to decipher the signs in case you are dating one. This has been a major factor in recent years because a lot of women find out that they have been married to gay men for years, and some even had children with them, which makes it much more devastating. The thing is that these men are really good when it comes to hiding the obvious signs, which means you have to step up. But if you are well schooled in unveiling such qualities, you will always be in a position to detect them in a matter of days, not years. If your husband is secretly gay, you can always tell by how he flirts or talks when he is among other men. Some of the traits that gay men exhibit are universal, meaning that more often than not, these traits come out subliminally (without their knowledge). You, therefore, need to learn to keep an eye on your husband, especially when having doubts about his sexuality. Finding out whether or not he is gay is important as far as your relationship is concerned because of a number of things. First and foremost, you can both sit down and discuss a way forward. You might also be trapping him in a life that he doesn’t want or maybe he is just bi-curious. Either way, finding out is important so that you can have that really important talk that will determine the future of your relationship at the end of the day. Once you have learned how to detect these telltale signs and unearthed the big secret that your man is gay, then you should take things to the next level. Remember to always be gentle when approaching the subject and when you feel it’s time to talk to him.

1. Going bare-chested is among the signs of gay men

As hard as your boyfriend or husband might be trying to hide his homosexual side, there are things about himself that he just can’t disguise. For instance, when he is around other men, he will always want to go bare-chested. He might even come up with plenty of excuses including being too hot and stuff like that. Going bare-chested is a subliminal language of attraction among gay men and should, therefore, be among the strongest signs to look out for. What I am trying to say is that straight men aren’t usually in the habit of taking off their shirts. And even when it’s too hot, they’ll opt for sticking to trunk tops, even if they have well-chiseled abs. And if they have to go topless, then there has to be a bevy of hot women around. Therefore, always make sure that you are checking out the going-topless tip among other signs that show that your man might be gay. He might also act feminine and in a flirtatious manner, especially when he is sure you aren’t watching. More often than not, the guys will notice the feminine attributes but won’t tell you because they don’t want to hurt your feelings. Nobody likes being the bearer of bad news. It would, therefore, mean that you have to learn how to decode the flirting as well as the body language exhibited by your topless, feminine husband. He might even sign up at the local gym despite being the most not-so-athletic man ever. Chances are that he’s looking for some hot gay guys there.

2. Gay men signs -Having too many young male friends

Another way to know if your boyfriend or husband is hiding his sexuality is by looking at the crowd he surrounds himself by. Men, for the most part, love being in the company of other men who are within their age group. But when your husband is more inclined to have younger guys in his circle, then chances are that he is gay. You see, middle-aged men love feeling young, so they always have a penchant for hanging around with young people. But for straight guys, they always prefer hanging around younger, more attractive females. If your husband prefers the company of younger guys and acts feminine whenever he is around them, then you might just have a gay man in your hands. It’s not as if there is anything wrong with being gay; what is wrong is being trapped with a gay man who wants to be free. So, for the sake of your relationship, it is imperative that you start asking the necessary questions. Don’t give him any benefit of the doubt when it comes to his sexuality, but be nice and get to ask him as gently as possible. If he isn’t ready to come clean, he might get offended and attempt to throw a tantrum or redirect the conversation. Doing so only proves he might be having a boyfriend he doesn’t want you to know about. When “kicking it” with his young male mates, your husband might have a couple of buttons undone exposing his chest. He might also be speaking in a language that only gay men can relate to. Again, never take these signs for granted and once you have detected them, the next thing for you to do would be to talk to him. Make him understand the importance of being told and knowing the truth. He has to understand that this is a marriage and your feelings matter, too. That is the only way he will ever come clean.

3. Gay men travel to far off places too often

Gay men trapped in straight relationships find it the hardest coming out of the closet. This explains why they often take their flirting and homosexual escapades to faraway places where nobody knows them. Doing so is very important to them because they can get to feel free being themselves. If a chance to go out and see the world pops up, believe me, that they will take it without a moment’s hesitation. Closeted gay men in will also take a lot of “business trips” and will always seem very reluctant about coming back home. And when your husband comes back from such trips, he might be smelling like a lot of gel or lotion. Just know that he has been having lots of fun with other gay men but is not about to fill you in on any of it. For the most part, gay men always find it hard to come clean about their sexuality because they don’t want to hurt their wives. Therefore, you should return the favor by not being too confrontational about your new findings, but that doesn’t mean that you aren’t supposed to confront him about it. If you do this right, then you will move your relationship to a better, much healthier space. Gay men end up hurting their wives when they finally admit that they have a boyfriend somewhere far, far away. But you need to be nice and use a less offensive language when approaching the gay issue. This is because his well-guarded secret is probably hurting him more than you.

4. Feminine dress code is among the signs of gay men

Gay men will always have an affinity for the latest fashion trends. Their wardrobes are colorful and they will always dress to kill. The straight man also happens to have a wardrobe but it’s always in malfunction mode. More often than not, he needs his wife to bail him out when it comes to dressing for an important occasion. But the above example doesn’t apply to gay men at all, which is why clothes are a very important aspect to note when figuring out your husband’s unclear sexuality. He may not be flirting with women but will always be complementing them especially on their outfits, which is something that straight men don’t do, at least not in detail. Besides, straight men don’t even take note when they are dressed to kill until they are complimented. It, therefore, goes without saying that his dress code should be among the first signs you need to check out. He might also be flirting with men who are kind enough to compliment him on his cleanliness and pay attention to his conspicuous clothing. So, for the sake of your relationship, you need to come clean and ask your husband if he has a boyfriend or boyfriends, for that matter. Apart from his colorful and tight clothes, you also need to pay attention to the kind of cologne that your man loves to wear. If it is true that he is gay, then he will definitely have a cologne or two that are women’s. And even if he doesn’t wear it when with you, he definitely wears it when you aren’t around. And if you pay close attention, you will catch a whiff of feminine cologne on him after his several “business trips”.

5. Gay signs - Gay men have strange sexual demands

Another language that most gay men speak is fetishism. I am not saying that having a couple of fetishes is bad, but strange, out-of-the-blue fetishism might be a strong indicator that your husband is hiding something about his sexuality. For instance, he might insist on using sex toys meant for women on him. Another one of the signs that your husband might be gay is playing submissive and you playing the dominatrix during roleplay. This might not mean that he is gay, especially if you are the one who wants to feel dominant once in a while. But if you are constantly being begged to be the dominatrix, then chances are that you are married to a gay man. And while you are role-playing, it might be a good idea for you to watch him closely. Even when your husband is flirting with you, he will always want you to be the man and give him orders. He might even go to the extent of wearing makeup and putting on lady clothes for the sake of roleplaying. And when exchanging roles, he might seem to genuinely enjoy flirting like a woman – something that most straight men struggle with. If this happens, then it’s about time you and your husband talk about his sexuality.

6. Interest in gay porn is among the signs of being gay

First and foremost, porn is toxic for any relationship because it always gives illusions about what love is. Porn also sets incredibly high standards that normal people can’t attain. So, if your man is obsessed with porn, then it means that you have a big problem on your hands. Also, if your husband or boyfriend is not only inclined to porn but also loves the male pornstars, he is 100% gay. The whole point of men watching porn is to see the female pornstars and their perfect bodies – end of the story. He also might start acting all feminine when he sees his favorite “porn boyfriend” getting off, which is a strange thing for a straight man to do. Apart from that, his favorite sex genre when it comes to porn is none other than the gay genre because that’s a language that gay men speak. You will have to pay close attention to how your man acts, and never take these signs for granted. If you have to, then go check his browser history and get all the answers that you seek. As stated earlier, gay men are usually very secretive. And this means that you’ll have to be vigilant if you are to get the answers that you seek. So, apart from flirting with younger men, evaluating his porn addiction is one of the most important signs that you should never miss out on.

7. Being too self-conscious is one of the signs he's gay

A gay husband will always be self-conscious about his looks, and nothing will make him think otherwise. He will always clean up and be very upset when anything is not in order. The last time I checked, women were the ones who were supposed to get upset, especially when they have to clean after their men. Men are just messy by nature, and there is so little to do about it. So, if your man is the one doing the cleaning and complaining, it’s time for you to bring his sexuality into question. Being open is a very important factor in any relationship. And if your relationship is to thrive, then you and your boyfriend or husband need to sit down and talk about his feminine behavior. Apart from his feminine language when around other men, you also need to check his obsession with cleaning up. He might even go to the extent of tweezing his eyebrows, getting facials and his nails done. If you ever mess up your eyebrows, don’t be surprised when he offers to do them for you. The good thing is that women have a sharp sixth sense. And once they are inclined to get investigating, they most certainly will get to the bottom of things. The good thing is that detecting gay men still in the closet is very easy and women can do it with their eyes closed, metaphorically speaking.


Set out looking for adventure.

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Knowing the signs exhibited by gay men isn’t enough. As stated above, you will have to know how to approach the issue the right way, and doing it gently is very important because sexuality is a touchy subject, especially for gay men who haven’t come out of the closet yet. That is why they keep it under wraps and get to flirting with other men in secrecy. That said, when your husband finally admits he is gay, you need to process your new-found knowledge open-mindedly for the sake of your relationship. Don’t force him to spill the beans or yell at him because he might snap and that will definitely end the relationship. You have to understand that your husband is still in a relationship with you because he loves you. He also kept the homosexual side of him a secret because he wanted to protect you and what you both have. So, it would only make sense for you to be thankful for that by being nice and gentle when talking about his secret relations. Let him talk to you whenever he feels comfortable to do so. And when discussing it, please, use nice and polite language. Again, it is very important that you be mindful of his feelings. And even after finding out that he has a boyfriend on the side, continue being a sweetheart to him, even if it hurts you. At the end of the day, you’ll both benefit from having that talk, which is the whole point for investigating his feminine traits. That being said, if you don’t know how to decode the signs that your husband is gay, then you can start off by checking out the above-mentioned tips. Feel free to find out many more obvious signs that might indicate that your husband is gay.