Top 12 Must-Know Dating Rules Everyone Should Know About

Dating is a great ground for building a worthwhile bond with another person. It may occur naturally but it is important to follow these 12 rules.

By Gerald Matiri
Top 12 Must-Know Dating Rules Everyone Should Know About

What you need to know about dating

It doesn’t matter if you are going on your very first date or dating again after a break-up, going out with someone is a big risk. You will be subjecting yourself to possible rejection or a potential love affair. To avoid common pitfalls and optimize the success rate of your relationship, you need some principles that will guide you. You may not know what to do sometimes and you might also wonder why things are not as interesting as you thought they would be. This is where you should countercheck dating rules and see what needs to be adjusted. There is a lot of advice out there but these 12 commandments are the most helpful.

1) There is no perfect meeting spot

No one knows when and where they would meet their next date. You will be denying yourself tons of opportunities to meet potential partners if you continually look at a single spot. Some happily married couples today met at a supermarket or a somewhere in a crime scene. Truth is, love can sprout from anywhere and all you have to do is open your eyes wide. Have you ever tried online dating? Who knows? Maybe that’s where you will find your soul mate.

2) Set rules concerning what you are looking for

The main objective of dating is to find out if the other person is your ideal type of an intimate partner. Find out the things you can accept and those that you cannot compromise on. Perhaps you hate cigarettes and if he is a smoker, this will be an instant deal breaker. You don’t need to waste time with a character you cannot stand. As you set your negotiables straight, try as much as possible not to list financial and physical matters. You should focus on their inner person and values. Before you decide what you want, you have to know yourself first. How do you like to communicate? What are your strengths? If you are an outgoing person, you need a partner who is fun to be with. Do not stick to what other people say but rather listen to your heart. However, you want to be very clear about the type of relationship you are seeking. He must know whether you are in for a long-term relationship or just a casual thing so that he may have a mental ease. For instance, if you initiate a kiss on the first date, he will be under the impression that you want to be his lover. So, make sure that your actions and words stay clear.

3) No need to rush during the initial days of dating

It is a wrong notion that particular things must happen after a certain period of time. You don’t have to put time limits for your dating goals. It is said that good things happen only to those who are willing to wait. You might do things in a hurry and mess up along the way. The last thing you want is to regret dating someone you never took time to know. Most of the best relationships begin with friendship. Statistics show that friends make the ideal dates since they have known each other for long. Look at it this way, you would be more compatible with someone you have shared a history and have similar values. A friend most likely knows your family background and you know theirs as well. If you want to build a meaningful connection, consider starting from friendship zone. You want to be with someone who will be your friend forever as opposed to just a sex partner. Focus more on having a good time and do not be in a rush to do the most intimate things like French kiss or lovemaking.

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4) Disregard the rules of finding Mr. Right

There is something you must know by heart: the perfect partner doesn’t exist. Truth is dating is not some divine lottery whereby the participants get a winning ticket. As a matter of fact, you don’t need a completely compatible partner. You must be willing to commit to somebody in spite of your differences and life challenges. At some point, you will discover flaws in this person and that does not mean you have to move one. The beauty of a relationship is to accept one another’s weaknesses and grow together. Both of you have imperfections and it would be unfair if you expect him to be Mr. Perfect.

5) Allow friends to set you up, but lay down some rules

This rule is optional. Your true friends love you very much. And they want the best for you. If you can meet a person through your closest pals, you will enjoy the comfort and familiarity that comes with it. Before your friends make arrangements, they will vet your potential partner and it wouldn’t hurt if you allow them to be the matchmakers. Nevertheless, you should put down some rules. For instance, let them know that you are the one who decides how the date goes and your decisions are paramount. There can be chemistry or no chemistry and if anything goes horribly wrong, it would be nobody’s fault. But if things work out well, try not to go overboard like getting drunk.

6) Pick a suitable online dating site

The internet is full of love. From Twitter, Facebook, and specific sites where single people meet, you can find a date quite easily. But you need to know how to select the best site. First, consider how you want your online dating experience to be. Do you need a boyfriend, a casual hookup, or a potential spouse? The problem with most single people is that they waste a lot of time with all sorts of anonymous partners without knowing what they are looking for. You must also know that there are a lot of online scams which can put your finances or even your life at risk. If you come across something fishy, do what needs to be done to stay safe. One rule of online dating is to stay safe. Be very keen on any uneasy feelings the anonymous individual provokes in you. Even though first impressions may be wrong, you have to trust your guts and consider misgivings seriously. If you feel insecure about meeting this new person, have someone watching you closely.

7) Play the real game

There are particular misleading dating rules you probably came across a long time ago and have influenced your thinking since then. Forget about the dates you watch on TV; they are not real. On the other hand, you will be going out with a real person and not a movie character. Never try to act like your favorite movie personality as you will mess things up even before you get started. If your date falls for a faked role you played during your first meeting, he might dump you very soon if he discovers you are something else. There is nothing so disappointing when you find that you are dealing with a fraud. If you are true to him and yourself, you will reveal something that he might just be looking for. Note that there is no solid relationship that is built on games. There is no need for disguise or funny attitudes because sooner or later, they will fade away and what will remain is the real you. Therefore, you should aim at intriguing him with your true character. Sure, you may attract him with what he wants to see but for how long will you deliver that? At one point, your fake game will come to an end and your false image will be exposed. If you are looking forward to a true connection and growth, just be yourself.

8) Do not compare the person you are dating with others

It is not wise to compare your date with other people. You will only be disappointed once you learn that he cannot compete with the rest. Maybe your first boyfriend knew how to kiss well but this one doesn’t. You should know that not every man is good at everything. He might be terrible at some things but the best man stays real and that’s what makes him unique.

9) Be open-minded

At twenty years of age, you probably wanted to date a tall, dark, and handsome guy and any man with a child would have been a turn-off. In your late twenties, you realize that physical qualities don’t matter at all and all you need is a good character and a financially stable guy and so you forego the handsome quality. But if you were to ask a 40-year-old lady what her ideal date is, she would tell you simply a loving person, regardless of their looks and financial status. So, this tells you that there is no need to limit yourself to certain people with particular traits. It is important to be realistic and find out what you would want from your partner when their physical beauty and money go away.

10) First impression lasts forever

You will be very nervous on your first date and must find a way to compose yourself. The very first few moments of meeting someone are very critical. You will only need a couple of minutes to know if you are interested in the relationship or not. You must, therefore, bring up your A-game as soon as you arrive. Ensure that you smile, make eye contact, and be attentive. A simple kiss on the cheek would mean a lot to your date. But as you try to make flawless first impressions, don’t forget to check how your partner behaves as well.

11) Avoid over-sharing

Sometimes you can’t help but vomit lots of words. You should be very careful with what you say. Avoid awkward moments by taking too much of your problems. Remember that dating is not therapy where you spill out everything going on in your life. If you are out to have fun, focus on the interesting things without bringing in topics that would ruin the happy moments. Also, do not portray yourself as a know-it-all for instance by teaching him how to kiss.

12) Dating requires a sense of humor

Humor brings a sense of playfulness and comfort. It’s pivotal to attractiveness and you will both feel comfortable around each other when you make funny jokes. This should be on top of your dating rules if you don’t want to have a boring relationship. Sometimes, dating feels like an interview where the perfect candidate is sought after and you want to make sure that the other person finds something exciting about you. If you can make them laugh, then you will enjoy yourselves.

As far as dating is concerned, there is no one-size-fits-all. A teenage girl would date differently than a 27 or 40-year-old lady. But in general, women want similar results and so the 12 dating rules should apply to any age. Successful relationships are founded on the aforementioned principles. Remember that you are the greatest dating asset and so must not try to fake yourself. Simply fine-tune your innate traits so that your partner may see the real you. Only your true self will work for your merit.