10 Reasons Why You Have Never Been In A Serious Relationship

To begin with, yes, it does feel amazing to be in love. You meet someone, fall in love, and if the other person reciprocates the same emotions, you decide to commit to each other for as long as your love shall last. This is the basic idea of being in a serious relationship. But unfortunately, it is not as simple as it seems. When in love, other emotions and sentiments follow. The expectations, the promises, the breaking of these promises, the truths and lies, the games and changing of minds, rejection, loyalty, the future and the past and what not. These are all just natural parts of a relationship. The ending is as tricky as the beginning is easy. At first, it is all about happy moments. The couple talks endlessly for hours about almost everything. One never runs out of compliments. It is like exploring a new soul, and you find something loveable in every fold. Even the tantrums and fights seem cute and the making up after those fights, even more admirable. With so much love in the air, it can be a little difficult for singles to breathe at times. And apparently, there is no mask available. Other people's love lives choke you up at every possible moment. This is just a typical representation of the horror it is to be single around couples.

Just the idea of being bound to a person for a lifetime, which might seem like forever, can leave you shaking with fear and insecurity. It is a well-recognized fact that serious relationships are not something everyone can cope up with. And it takes a great deal of courage to commit to someone. Not everyone is meant to be romantic or sensitive; not all the people in the world know the art of adjustment and only a few people have the guts to knowingly devote their lives to one person. With so much emotional baggage, it's quite normal to be scared. After all, dating is not easy at all. It's not just guys that run from commitment but a lot of girls too. Unfortunately, some people are so scared of relationships that it becomes a real phobia to even think of being serious about any person. It is perhaps the insecurity of losing the perks of a single life that makes it so hard for some people, especially the young ones. In some cases, there's also anxiety that builds up from the thought of dating. The fear of being hurt later from a relationship can be a reason that many people never find a partner. As time passes, you'll find out more about the person, and you might realize that he or she isn't meant for you, and you break up. Moreover, if your girlfriend or boyfriend is quite serious about the relationship, you need to be even more cautious before taking any step forward. The unwillingness to give up your freedom is a very common reason for the end of a lot of love stories before they even start. Obviously, one does need to think of their partner before doing anything that they would be doing without any second thoughts otherwise. No matter how open-minded your partner is, at some point, issues are bound to arise, like going out for drinks with some close friends or some random unplanned trips.

This is the most common reason why people never get into a serious relationship. Many find the love of their life in high school and marry a few years later. Others stumble upon 'the one' during college, work, or just another night out with the guys or gals. You see, love can be found at any place and at any time. On the other hand, others are just desperately waiting for someone to come along who is worth a serious relationship. It is not like you are too choosy about having a boyfriend or a girlfriend, as some nosy people might assume. You just understand your worth and are looking for someone who understands it as well. It simply means that you have struggled hard to be where you are today and to be what you are. It would all go down the drain if you just let someone else lower your value. You are looking for a companionship that elevates you instead of bringing you down. Love for oneself is equally important to how you love others. After all, how could you be compassionate for some other person if you don't acknowledge yourself enough in the first place? You've set the bar high enough that it takes time to find a boyfriend or girlfriend that isn't scared to make an effort for you. And you are certainly never willing to settle for anything less or more than anything than that. Hence, you are just patiently waiting for the right match, which is crucial for long-term togetherness. This perspective of dating has never been well understood or accepted by a lot of people. But it doesn't matter anyway, as love doesn't happen according to age or time. And as the saying goes, 'The longer you wait, the hotter you date'.

'Never have I ever... found the love of my life.' It might be that you have taken your single game far too seriously or just not been interested in dating. While waiting for the perfect match, you may have set unrealistic expectations for your future girlfriend or boyfriend. This unwillingness to see beyond your expectations is the reason why you have never been in a long-term or serious relationship. Guys, as amazing as a person might be, one is always required to make a few adjustments. You do need to lower your high expectations and accept the person you are in a relationship with, along with all their flaws and strengths. Finding the exact person you have in mind is nothing less than a miracle. The probability is, therefore, very low. A prince charming suited in armor or a wonder woman is highly unlikely to find you in college, the office, or a bar. But this doesn't make the person you're interested in any less special. Their seemingly ordinary existence can be something extraordinary for you if you just let go of your singlehood. Being in a relationship is not all dreamy and dramatic, but realistic, and that's the beauty of it. If you spend years waiting for guys or girls that exist only in your imagination, a lot of possible serious relationships would be lost. It is okay to be scared, but a long-term partnership requires patience and strong will. That is why you can easily spot a lot of older people who have never been in a long-term relationship in their life. The reason that you have never been in a relationship might be that you have stayed single for such a long time that most of the good guys are now gone, and you end up alone. Even the greatest superheroes, gangsters, mutants, and billionaires get to build a normal life to live happily ever after with their partners.

When it comes to dating, this is a big issue, specifically in the current generation. People work really hard while building an identity. This cannot be done without respecting oneself. It's one of the initial steps towards a healthy and successful life. Self-respect becomes an essential aspect of this process. But what goes wrong is that often people mix it up with ego. These aspects are differentiated by a very fine line. It becomes difficult to maintain equilibrium. Relationships, especially a serious one, demand an adequate amount of compromises and changes. This is not something bad to do. Without evolving, it is impossible to stay with a person. If you insist on doing the same thing over and over again without regard for the emotions of your girlfriend or boyfriend, the relationship is likely to fail. To be happy with each other for the long-term, it is important to let go of egotistic behavior and take a stand only when needed. One should never forget the difference between oneself and his/her partner. A bit of flexibility can settle disagreements and consequently save a relationship, while petty arguments and stubbornness will only ruin it. It is good to listen and sometimes do something your partner wants. If it makes them happy, you would feel delighted too, eventually.

This is another common, yet the most heartbreaking, cause why most people have never been in a serious relationship. The pain that the bad guys leave you with is not something a person gets over in a day or so. It might take weeks, months, years, or even a lifetime. In some cases, the suffering continues until the last breath. Even if you get over the person, you might not get over the feeling of being rejected or hurt. Or some bad experiences of a heartbreak have created so much insecurity that it is next to impossible to let any new person come into your life and try to get close to you. It creates a sense of fear when you think about giving anyone the chance to hurt you again. These insecurities and horrible experiences make it hard to trust someone all over again; to go through the same process of knowing a person seems tiresome and unsafe. But when the right person comes along, you will be ready again to open the gates to your heart. You will eventually love someone again and let someone love you unconditionally as well.

We are so busy making a living that we often lose focus on living in a true sense. In this rat race for money, power, and desires that are never satisfied, love and dating is not something given priority that easily. Even if it is not about money, fame, power, or any sort of personal desires, the scary career-making process drains out all your energy already. Then there is nothing left to give in a relationship. While dating, time becomes a common issue and nothing lasts for the long-term if one does not put effort into it. Many people aspire to dream big, do big, and achieve big in their lives. In this vision of a greater cause, the personal life is what gets sacrificed most often.

This one is especially for all the single girls out there who crave to be independent, who never want to be a trophy wife/girlfriend to anyone. The ones who like to share the bill instead of making their partner pay, who lift their shopping bags themselves, who do not seek permission from their man to wear a dress or meet a certain person. But then, being with someone all the time does make you dependent on them intentionally or unintentionally. This might mean being dependent physically, financially, or emotionally. This is all natural; there's nothing wrong about it as the couple is supposed to live together happily. Romantic cooperation is never unsuccessful. This also applies to the guys who never want to share every detail of their routine, business, or thoughts. For any person in general who is just open-minded and wishes to maintain their individuality while being in a relationship, this causes a bit of problem as it is a bit difficult to find someone of the same mentality. You probably hate people who are clingy or jealous or possessive, and you find them hard to cope with.

All sorts of perspectives exist, and this is also one of the probable reasons why you have not been involved with someone on a serious level. This can be because you want to have much more than an 'I love you', or a bunch of flowers and chocolates or a romantic song perhaps. Depending on the thinking and fantasies of a person, the expectations from your partner may vary as well. In case you are not satisfied with the fact that the person feels the same way about you, then it can be a little tricky to stay or even find a true relationship. Some people want money, sex, compromises, promises, gifts, and so on. This is, however, never wrong. Different people have different mindsets and want several different things. It does not make it easier, though, to settle for a relationship which is not what you want from the heart. After all, love has a different meaning for every person, and there are no guidelines or definitions for it.

Dating a person means going out with them, and their friends too at times, exploring new places, talking regularly to one person, etc. This is all one big horror story for an introvert. The idea of being around a person all the time, to do things you would readily replace with staying at home, can make you feel scared and drained. This is hard to deal with because you would not know a person unless you spend time with them. And home dates are not something every boyfriend or girlfriend would appreciate all the time. Socializing is a daunting task and most relations just end due to the lack of communication. You are easily being misunderstood for being aloof when you are just who you are. Hence, you could end up alone and scared for the long-term.

Eternal love and the idea of having one partner all your life is not acceptable to a few people. It might sound like being unfaithful or incapable of having a serious relationship. But actually, it is just a matter of choice. If a person is with different people from time to time, that might mean their soul just always wants to explore new people. Each person has a right to make a choice. Being committed to one person is not a very comfortable idea for certain people, and may even scare them. It is all good, until and unless you choose to hurt someone through heartbreak or lack of loyalty. Ultimately, you discover numerous things with new people. It is always exciting if you know how to go with the flow!

Whichever way people see it, whether they are scared of dating or not, a relationship is an important part of life. Some might even say it's a necessary phase. It feels good to know that someone cares about you in every minute, someone will shower love on you, someone will understand and respect your opinions, and someone wants to share their life with you. If you find a person like this, never let them go. However, it won't harm you to defy the norms until the time you are genuinely happy with your boyfriend or girlfriend. A relationship and love have a different meaning to each person. Similarly, a serious romantic relationship also plays out differently for every person. Consequently, the causes and the solutions for relationship problems - or lack of a relationship altogether - are varied too.