36 Subtle Ways to Flirt With Your Crush

Whether it’s your first crush or your twentieth crush, finding ways to flirt with them can feel like an awkward, scary, and exciting experience all at once. No matter how many times you’ve done it, you feel like you have no idea what you’re doing. Start by trying out these 36 subtle ways to flirt with your crush.

If your crush walks past you, drop your book or water bottle or whatever is in your hand right as they pass. When you both lean down to pick it up, you can accidentally bump into them and laugh about it.

If you have friends in common, start hanging out with them more often. This is a less obvious way to get closer to your crush since you’ll be more likely to both get invited to the same things if you are hanging out with the same group.

As much as possible, be the one to end conversations. And end them before you run out of things to say. In fact, right when things start flowing, come up with a reason you have to go. The sudden end right when it’s getting good will leave your crush wishing for more.

Texting your crush is a great chance to flirt. But texting them too much will make it seem like you’re obsessing over them. If you’re having a regular back and forth exchange with them, at least once or twice, you should wait 10+ minutes to reply. When you do reply, say that you were busy or had to talk to a friend. Make sure that you aren’t always the one texting first—even if that means going a full day without texting your crush.

A quick smile and wave without actually stopping shows you notice your crush but that you aren’t dropping what you’re doing to talk to them. It’ll get them noticing you without feeling like you’re stalking.

Look for things you and your crush are both interested in. Don’t fake an interest in something you aren’t familiar with just to flirt. If you don’t know of any common interests yet, you can say you want to learn more about something they are interested in. For example, “Oh, I’ve never seen that movie! But I’ve always wanted to watch it!” This gives your crush an opening to invite you to watch it with them!

When you’re sitting next to your crush, pull out some lip balm and slowly apply it to your lips. Don’t look at them when you do this. Just do it when you know they’re looking.

When your crush sits near you and say something to you, say “What?” as if you didn’t quite catch what they said. This will make them lean in a little closer to repeat it. Make eye contact when they lean in.

If you want to make it subtly obvious that you like them, stare at your crush when they aren’t paying attention. They’ll feel the gaze and turn. Wait until they make eye contact and then dart your eyes away and act bashful. Don’t overdo it, just be quietly embarrassed.

Smile, make eye contact, lean toward your crush slightly when you talk. Touch them lightly or brush against them. You can hold a perfectly normal conversation and let your bodies flirt.

Perfume on your neck, chest, and behind your ears can drive your crush crazy. Don’t drown yourself in it and pick a seductive scent—something more rich, less fruity.

Inviting your crush to something with a group of other friends will let you guys get closer to each other and create great flirt opportunities without all the pressure of a one-on-one date.

Remembering the little things like how they don’t like ketchup on their burger or they always wear their lucky sneakers before an exam will show your crush you are actually paying attention. Bring it up later (like much later) to show you remember.

As things progress with your crush, you can start to flirt more boldly. Hold the eye contact with them instead of turning away and acting embarrassed. Smile when they notice you staring. This shows confidence and sends a clear signal. But don’t be too intense about it.

You should make a few compliments every now and then but they shouldn’t be too excessive. And be somewhat indirect. Instead of “you look good today,” say “I like that shirt!” This shows that you notice but still leaves some intrigue around your intentions. Plus, every time he puts on that shirt, he’ll think of you!

Instead of praising their every step, flirt playfully. Tease your crush. This makes you seem more interesting and also subtly suggests you are someone they need to work to impress.

If your crush texts you a double question or multiple questions, leave something unanswered. For example “Hey, how are you? What are you up to?” Respond with “I’m great, you?” Leave the second part hanging. It’ll keep them feeling like they need to know more and need to keep the conversation going.

Don’t be generic with things like “you look nice” or “great job!” Give your crush specific compliments like “whoa! I didn’t know you were such a history buff!” after they ace a test.

Connect with your crush on social media. Don’t stalk their accounts (at least don’t do it obviously) but make sure they can also stalk your accounts. And like or comment strategically.

If you know you will see your crush, wear a really flattering outfit. It doesn’t have to be revealing but it should be an outfit that draws attention to your best assets!

Sometimes the best way to flirt is to be unavailable. If you’re always around, your crush won’t have a chance to long for you. Wait to respond to texts. Be too busy to go on a group hang your crush will be at. Don’t completely avoid them. Just show you aren’t always available.

If you don’t feel confident, sexy, and interesting, channel your favorite role model who embodies all of those things for you. If you aren’t sure what to do in a situation, flirt the way your role model would!

This is the 21st century. We flirt in memes now. It’s a super casual way to show that you are thinking about your crush. And it gives them a taste of your amazing personality and sense of humor.

Find something your crush is interested in and ask for help related to it. If they’re into music, for example, ask them to help you make a playlist for your friend’s birthday party.

Keep your phone in your pocket or purse. Or leave it face down on the table. When talking to your crush, show that you are 100% present. With a phone in hand, it looks like you’re just waiting for the moment you can leave the conversation.

Necks are sexy and you can show it off without looking like your obviously being revealing. Make a point to keep your neck long and your shoulders pulled back when you talk. If you’re not talking, look up while you think and absentmindedly brush your fingers against your neck.

It doesn’t even have to be a sexual dream. In fact, it could be a totally weird and funny dream that will make them laugh. Just show that they are in your head.

Not in that way! Just absentmindedly massage your shoulder or your thigh as if its sore and bothering you while your crush is near enough to see.

Flirt by accidentally bumping into your crush, brushing against them as you walk past, or accidentally sliding your legs over next to theirs when sitting next to each other. Physical touch will send electricity through their nerves.

Definitely don’t overdo this but every once in a while, give your crush their favorite candy bar. You could also give them a pack of gum and teasingly flirt about how now you can be the one that steals gum from them all the time. Be casual about it.

You’ve been dreaming about planting a kiss on those lips. Put that dream in their head by leaning in close as if you are going for a kiss but then whisper something in their ear instead. The misdirection will get your crush thinking about the kiss and then obsessing over it when it doesn’t happen.

Text your crush something like “What are you doing later?” When they reply, say “Oops, sorry, I meant to text a friend but sure.” Even if it doesn’t lead to actual hanging out, it will put the idea in their head.

If you’re feeling too shy or inexperienced to be the bold flirt you want to be around your crush, practice with strangers. Flirt with the waiter, the cashier, your friend’s neighbor. Flirt with people you aren’t interested in and don’t really know so the pressure is off.

Those little things that people need: lip balm, gum, a lighter, Band-Aids, and so on should be in your purse or pockets at all times. If your crush needs something, you’ll be standing at the ready!

No matter how awkward or insecure you feel, throw your shoulders back, keep your head up and radiate confidence. Just having a confident posture or walk can add 20 points to your hotness factor.

While the subtle flirt strategy is great, at a certain point, you should just go for it. Tell your crush you like them. Ask them on a date. Being direct can be scary but it’s totally worth it. Because if they tell you they aren’t interested, that frees you to start moving on. And, if your crush says yes, that’s one of the best feelings in the world!

Coming up with the ultimate way to flirt with your crush is a fun part of dating. Those cute, sometimes awkward things you did early on to get close to them will be great stories to talk about later on. So go ahead, toss your book in the bushes and pretend you lost it!