6 Signs to tell if you need Relationship Counseling

Obvious Signs that urges you to go for relationship counseling

By Evelyn
6 Signs to tell if you need Relationship Counseling

What is Relationship Counseling?

How is your relationship? Have you noticed some changes? Do you think you've reached a rough patch? If the answer to these 3 questions is yes, then maybe you and your partner are in need of some relationship counseling.

What exactly is relationship counseling? Basically, it's a therapy to help you improve your relationship. With the help of a professional counselor, phycologist or therapist you explore, recognize and resolve conflicts or issues that may be plaguing your relationship causing a lot of distress between you and him.  

The issues you may need to resolve could be specific, for example about a decision you have to make as a couple (where to live, when to get married, when to have a baby). Or you need help with more substantial issues like discovering a past affair or constant fighting, or differences in sexual desire. Or you want to make a long-termed commitment and need to understand each other better.

6 Signs That Tells If You Need To Sign Up For Relationship Counseling

It's a good thing to seek relationship counseling, it could make a big difference and it could save your relationship. If you're not sure you should seek relationship counseling, there are some signs that could warn you. Keep reading to learn about 6 of them.  

1. You talk about the issues with everyone else but him

Your significant other should be the first to know that things are not good. If you spend your time texting or having dinner with your friends to talk about the issues you're having with him, your not doing something to fix those issues, you're just prolonging the problems. 

Maybe you're scared to talk to him because you don't know how he will react or if he sees the same problems you do. If this is your case, you might be in need of some help to learn how to work on your relationship and how to talk about important issues. 

2. You speak Venusian and he's from Mars

Sometimes it feels like you're speaking different languages, your communication habits are totally off. What you think you said is not what your partner thought he heard and vice versa. You need to work on your natural communication styles, and that's where relationship counseling can help, 

It could help both of you understand the differences in the way you communicate and can teach each of you to adapt your communication style and work better together. 

3. All the bad things are his fault

You get a speeding ticket and somehow you manage to blame him for it, frown crazy, right? If this is what's happening, you're blaming him for everything! That's a sure sign that things are not good and that you need help.

Putting the blame on each other is not good for anyone, so go ahead and seek relationship counseling, they could help you figure out why you're resenting him or vice versa.  

4. Pretending all's good and dandy

Keeping it all inside is not going to work in the long-term. If you're one of those couples that instead of talking about the important things that are happening (like a lack of spark), brush things under the rug, you are good candidates for relationship counseling.

During a relationship counseling, you're in a safe environment, so with the help of the therapist you can learn how to tackle those difficult issues head-on safely and manageable for the both of you. 

5. You've both suffered something traumatic recently

Have any of you experienced a huge loss recently? The death of a parent or you've been in a serious accident or was laid off? All this takes a toll on your relationship. So something needs to be done. Counseling is very much recommended, you'll do better if apart from your individual counseling you take relationship counseling.

This could help you realize that you're not carrying the weight alone, it could bring back a good communication between the two of you. 

6. A big change is in the horizon

This is actually not a bad sign that you need relationship counseling. If you're about to make a big change (moving together, getting married, moving to another country because of work) as a couple it's a good idea to seek some kind of guidance. 

Relationship counseling could help you anticipate what's to come, it could prepare you for the changes ahead and work as a team so you can achieve your mutual goals. 

Relationship Counseling on Marriages

 Are you married and having some issues that you don't know how to resolve? Sometimes married couples also need help, and you can get this help by seeking relationship counseling for marriage, What is it? It's a type of psychotherapy that helps married couples to recognize and resolve conflicts to better their relationship. It can help couples make thoughtful decisions: rebuild a marriage, strengthen it or end it.   

Is this something you'd like to try? You should know that marriage counseling is hard work, it's a good thing that you're willing to invest time to try to salvage your marriage, but there are no guarantees. It depends on how willing and motivated you and your husband are to work on your marital issues.

Experts say that for the counseling to work, you shouldn't wait too long if you noticed that things are not working. You want to keep your marriage (you both), then seek help.

Photo by Christin Hume on Unsplash

Relationship counseling for marriage can help you and your husband in many ways. If your relationship patterns are toxic and you can identify them early and get to an agreement about them, then during counseling the process of real change can begin.

It can give you a new perspective to explore your problems and you can learn new ways to recognize and resolve them. Marriage counseling could also help you improve your communication, it can help you build trust so your interactions as a couple improve. 

It's a neutral territory where you and your husband could agree upon and work to resolve those tough issues with support.

Relationship Counseling on Couples Relationship Issues

Relationship counseling may differ depending what issue it is you need to work on, but there are five general principles that guide each relationship therapy.

Relationship counseling aims to:

1. Change your (yours and your SO's) views on the relationship

Maybe you have lost sight of the bigger picture and have a blind spot when it comes to the ways you contribute to the couple's troubles. All your focus is on what he's doing wrong.

A therapist during your counseling could help you take a more objective look or the relationship in the big picture as well as the specific problems you're dealing with. You'll be encouraged to stop the blame pattern and start working as a team.  

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

2. Modify any behavior that's dysfunctional

A counselor would help you modify your behaviors towards each other, especially the harmful ones. They could help you in the process of recognizing, acknowledging and altering them.

3. Decrease any emotional avoidance

For your relationship to flourish, you and him need to share your feelings with each other. Each has its own level of sharing where you feel comfortable, but to have a healthy relationship some level of communication has to occur.
 
Relationship counseling could aid you in expressing those feeling that you fear to share with him and vice versa.

Photo by S A R A H ✗ S H A R P on Unsplash

4. Improve your communication

Repairing and maintaining a good relationship depends on how constructively you communicate as a couple. During relationship counseling, the therapist could coach you to improve you and your significant other's communications skills.

Your goal here is effective communication, where you're required to listen actively and empathize.  

5. Promote both of your strengths

Every relationship has strengths and weaknesses, good relationship counseling will celebrate and enhance these strengths and help you identify them so you both could decide what works best for your relationship. 

3 Free Relationship Counselling available online

Nowadays more and more couple are seeking help to fix their relationships, and they are turning to the internet to do it. There are a lot of places on the web that offer relationship counseling online. It has some advantages over traditional relationship counseling. 

You can find an expert based on the issues you want to address, not necessarily based on the area you reside. You can connect with the therapist from anywhere (home, office, park), where it's most convenient for you at a time convenient for you too. 

Relationship counseling online is also cheaper, in some cases free. If you have a tight budget here are 3 online relationship counseling sites for you to check out.

1. Our Relationship

Our Relationship

Our Relationship offers online programs for couples where you can enhance your communications skills and find the right program that will help solve your relationship problems.

You need to sign up to start the process and there is a form you need to fill to see if you qualify for the online programs for free. 

2. Power of Two

Power of Two

You can have a free 3-day trial when you sign up. This online relationship counseling lets you join alone or with your SO. You'll have a personal coach that'll recommend activities, answer your questions, it's very interactive. After your free trial, if you decide to stay, you'll have to pay $18/month. 

3. 7 Cups Online Therapy

7 Cups Online Therapy

This online counseling is not specifically for relationships, it tackles a lot of issues. You'll find a list on the link and you can choose from there. You can start for free so you can explore if this is the right path for you, then if you want to continue, you'll have to pay a flat fee.

3 Best Paid Relationship Counselling in USA

There are some options for relationship counseling where to have to pay for a course, or for a coach or for an appointment, if you feel that this is something you want to do, then check this 3 options.

1.Save the Marriage

Save the Marriage

This relationship counseling is called The Save the Marriage System, design by Dr. Lee H. Baucom. Ph.D. It includes 4 modules (each builds on each other) that you can download, once you make the payment.

2. Gerard Counseling

Gerard Counseling

This relationship counseling is offered by Carolyn Gerard a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. You can book an appointment on the website or contact by phone. If you live in California, check it out,

3. Marriage Builders

Marriage Builders

This site offers a lot of options for relationship counseling, you should take the Site Tour to understand it better. It offers Courses, Seminars and has a Coaching Center.

Conclusion

Romantic relationships are awesome but also hard to maintain, they require a lot of work and time. If yours is on the right path and things are going great, Congratulations! we hope it can grow and turn into a lifetime together.

But if it's not, then don't hesitate, seek help, we have given you the signs, now all you have to do is find the courage and go for relationship counseling. 

Good luck! 

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