40 Funny Parenting Quotes That You Can Totally Relate To

40 Tongue in Cheek Parenting Quotes that are funny and honest

By Michele
40 Funny Parenting Quotes That You Can Totally Relate To

Apart from being messy, kids can be funny too. They can come up with extremely hilarious plus ingenious situations that will keep you laughing and wondering – for a long time. 

Raising kids is a huge challenge especially for the new parents. So, by the order of nature there is relief with every difficulty. So let’s smile it away and see how kids have evoked the puns, sarcasm and humor hidden in their parents.

Funny Parenting Quotes

Everything is so good about funny parenting quotes; they show that you are not alone. Nearly every other parent is going through some sort of comical situation now and then. Let’s have a look at what different people have to say about: their teenagers, their babies, being a dad, being parents for the first time and being a celebrity parent.  

About Teenager

Blessed are those who have a sharp and decent sense of humor. It actually helps in dealing with the most challenging situations of your life, just like raising teenagers, in an easy manner. Let’s see how parents are handling the spark that they ignited.

  1. “Having a thirteen-year-old in the family is like having a general-admission ticket to the movies, radio and TV. You get to understand that the glittering new arts of our civilization are directed to the teenagers, and by their suffrage, they stand or fall.”
  2. “You try your hardest to raise your teenagers with patience, honesty and good manners, but they still end up being like you.”
  3. “A teenager is always too tired to hold a dishcloth, but never too tired to hold a phone.”
  4. “Raising teenagers is like trying to wrestle slippery pigs with your hands tied behind your back.”
  5. “The difference between the teenager and the parent is that the teenager still has the faults the parent outgrew.”
  6. “Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.”
  7. “The main problem with teenagers is that they're just like their parents were at their age.”
  8. “The problem with disciplining a teenager is that in no time at all you begin to sound like one yourself.”

Related Article: Queen Beyonce's awesome quotes about Parenting
Queen Beyonce's awesome quotes about Parenting
  JayZ and Beyonce are Hip Hop Royalty, making them an equivalent of the royal family to America. 

About Baby

Having a baby makes you think that you are the only one going through hell. To remind you, you are joined by many others. Babies demand your maximum time and attention.

  1. “A child is a curly dimpled lunatic.”     
  2. "So true. I can remember times that I would lay down with my kids or grandkids to help them take a nap & I would fall asleep before they would.”
  3. "I need a cleanup crew and then 3 babysitters. 1 to keep him from making messes, 1 to keep him safe, and 1 to keep everyone else safe. LOL.”
  4. "More like things that go "waaaaa" in the night!"
  5. "Not sure why people think babies sleep!" 
  6. "Add juggling a newborn who's trying to latch on to nurse and trying to find the cellphone amid the large pile of unfolded laundry on the bed. And the picture is slightly more accurate!"
  7. "But you have to let them do it!!! It's worth the mess to see the satisfaction of their job well done!"
  8. "They need a bath when they start stinking"

Related Article: 30 Inspirational and touching children love quotes
30 Inspirational and touching children love quotes
 Parenting can be very challenging at times, but all that feel worth it when the children appreciate your hard work with all their small actions

About Dad

Being a dad, you will need to take part in many of the parenting related chores and experience something new every day. Thanks to mommies who nearly finish ever other major duty related to parenting and make things easier for dads.

  1. “Men should always change diapers. It's mentally cleansing. It's like washing dishes, but imagine if the dishes were your kids, so you really love the dishes.”
  2. “Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.”
  3. “I used to believe my father about everything but then I had children myself & now I see how much stuff you make up just to keep yourself from going crazy.”
  4. "Ha-ha! I was lucky my husband knew how to do it when our first child was born, coz I didn't!"
  5. “A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.” 
  6. “Recipe for Iced Coffee. 1. Have kids 2. Make coffee 3. Forget you made coffee 4. Drink it cold”
  7. “Two kids are easier than one because they play together. When you have one, you have to be the show. When you’ve got two, you’re just an usher. ‘Right this way ladies!’ They can play in the park while you’re reading the paper. ‘Hey, hey, hey! Get off her hair!’ Then you go back to reading ... One kid is horrible. Have a bunch of kids or have none at all.”
  8. “What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.”

Related Article: Celebrity Mom Khloe Kardashian parenting advice
Celebrity Mom Khloe Kardashian parenting advice
 Unless you’ve been living under a rock the past couple of years, you most likely know who the Kardashians are.

For New Parents

Parenting is a blessing, as some say it. I do not know about them ‘some’. Do not fall in any sort of trap, it is a trial. Just trying to be seriously funny! Okay. Actually new parents lose their senses easily as no wonder it’s their first time!

  1.  “All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.”
  2. “If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, keep away from children.”
  3. “It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snow blower, or vacuum cleaner.”
  4. “Parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.”
  5. “When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.”
  6. “Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.”
  7. “My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first one being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.”
  8. “We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.”     

From Celebrities

Source: @davidbeckham / Instagram

Let’s see what different celebrities have to say, when it comes to parenting and managing their busy schedule.

  1. “Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.” Phyllis Diller, American Actress
  2. “Went to Disneyland because my daughter's obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her.” Ryan Reynolds, Canadian-American Actor
  3.  “If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent.” Bette Davis, American Actress
  4. “Never have more children than you have car windows.” Erma Bombeck, American Humorist
  5. “You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.” Franklin P. Adams, American Columnist
  6. “Raising kids is part joy and part guerilla warfare.”Ed Asner, American Actor
  7. “Having children is like living in a frat house, nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.” Ray Romano, American Actor
  8. “Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.” Peter Ustinov, English Actor


Hey presto. It seems so easy raising kids – all of a sudden. As a matter of fact, all of these quotes come in really handy when you are coping up with babies, children or teenagers. Now, you have an idea that how parents are dealing with the most challenging situations in a calm manner. A little sense of humor helps in staying mentally stable. So keep it light and don’t lose your cool. Happy parenting!

Related Article: Differentiating children age range for child development
Differentiating children age range for child development
 Every child is different especially regarding their development.