The term “discipline” has always brought up a lot of controversial opinions amongst parents and guardians. With some actually thinking child discipline is overemphasized and that kids need to be just kids. Well regardless of what your opinion is, we all mostly agree that discipline takes different forms and sizes, and it all depends on every individual child. There is no doubt that when you discipline a child, you need to decide on how to discipline, who to discipline, and what actions warrants and requires certain penalties and consequences. Even though a child will always be a child, but it’s also important to instill good values and morals in them especially from a young age in order to help guide them in excelling and conquering the daily struggles of life.
Discipline is helping your child learn how to behave, as well as how not to behave. It works best when you have a warm and loving relationship with your child.
Discipline doesn’t always or even mean punishment like a lot of people make it sound, it’s about teaching your child right from wrong and letting them know what behavior is acceptable and what’s not. Just like every kid is different, disciplinary actions are also different, and not every action or penalty that works on one child has to work on another child.
When do you need child discipline?
Well, the good news is kids from as early as one year of age starts to understand the behavior around them, what’s acceptable and what’s not. They read and understand your facial reaction, voice tone, and all your likes and dislikes around the house. They try to push your button and see how much they can get away with it by throwing tantrums, throwing foods and all sorts of attention-grabbing behaviors to see if they can actually get away with certain things.
Even though discipline helps children in getting their act together and behaving appropriately, parents need to be careful about how they discipline, the extent they discipline and the technique they use in discipline their kids. Sometimes kids behave nicely not because they want to, but out of fear, they act a certain way around a certain person and a completely different way around another.
Below, let us take a look at a kind of behavior that a child display or exhibit that requires immediate discipline:
1. When your Child uses Inappropriate Languages
When your little one starts picking bad words like cursing, swearing or generally being insulting, disrespectful towards him or herself or the people around them, that’s when you need to sit with the child and have a talk with them. Find out about where this behavior is coming from, and let them be aware that the behavior isn’t acceptable and won’t be tolerated. Discuss what the consequences and punishment will be if not stopped. For kids who swear or curse, they usually pick that habit from the people around them, so as a parent yourself, you need to be mindful of your language and how you treat people especially around your kids.
2. When he or she is being violent
Violent, but necessarily, but when your child begins to hit, throw or push as a result of anger or showing frustration, then it’s time to enforce discipline and let them know that the behavior isn’t appropriate and is not going to be acceptable. You can help your child by teaching them other ways of getting rid of their anger either by talking about it, walking away or being patient.
3. When your child’s behavior is posing harm to other kids
Some kids are spoilt, therefore they feel entitled in a lot of ways, as a result, sometimes bullying and taking advantage of other kids. If you notice such behavior in your child, it’s important to impose discipline by helping them with resources like counseling.
There are a lot of reasons that will necessitate a child to require discipline, what’s most important is recognizing it from the start and dealing with it not in a harsh way, but by using love, communication and understanding when it comes to teaching and helping our kids in places and areas where they’re deficient at.
What are the benefits of child discipline
There are a lot of benefits and advantages of child discipline, mostly because it will help your child in the long run, but because it teaches them to grow into respectable and mindful human beings. Even though they’re a lot of benefits of good child discipline, but the following are some of our favorite ones;
1. It helps them deal with anxiety
Helps Kids Manage Anxiety. When adults offer positive and negative consequences, kids grow and learn.
2. Encourages good behavior
A child that is an effective discipline has more chances of making good choices and making good decisions in life.
3. Treat people with much respect
A well-disciplined child isn’t going to be hard to notice. He or she is taught from an early age and understands the importance of treating people with optimum respect and gratitude.
Types of child discipline
Well, people parent differently and there is a lot of discipline techniques that work for others and fails for some, it's all about finding balance in the dealing of your home and livelihood. The following are some of the most common and effective techniques of child discipline.
1. Rewarding Good Behavior
When a child is asked of him or her or expected of them, it’s important to compliment them by voicing out how proud and happy you are for the good actions they’ve carried out.
2. Take Away Certain Privileges
Taking away certain privileges like your kid's favorite toy, favorite gadget or something that is of extremely important to the child, that way he or she will understand the consequences of certain actions and that they will be consequences for bad behavior.
3. Natural Consequences
Your child does something wrong, and you let the child experience the result of that behavior. There's no need for you to "lecture." The child can't blame you for what happened. For example, if a child deliberately breaks a toy, he or she no longer has that toy to play with.
4. Logical Consequences
This technique is similar to natural consequences but involves describing to your child what the consequences will be for unacceptable behavior. The consequence is directly linked to the behavior. For example, you tell your child that if he doesn't pick up his toys, then those toys will be removed for a week.
Methods and laws for child discipline
1. Appeal to Right and Wrong
As children approach school age, they begin to develop empathy. In fact, it is not until the child is approximately six or seven years old that she becomes cognitively capable of this concept, according to Sandra Crosser, Ph.D. Talk to your child about how his behaviors might be affecting other people.
2. Give Them Space
Understand the children of this age need to work out differences for themselves from time to time. Your child is getting to an age where he or she can decide who to be friends with, what he or she likes and how to handle conflict. Guide your child in finding the right solution, but let him/her come to the conclusion on their own.
3. Go with what works
Grounding - something most parents remember from childhood - is still an effective discipline technique today. Dr. Phil recommends only allowing your child access to necessities and temporarily restricting your child to his bedroom for the day or night. This discipline technique helps your school-age child think about his/her behavior and understand the consequences to follow when rules are broken.
Laws for child discipline
Different states in America have different parental and discipline roles and laws. It’s important to be aware and educated on the parental laws regarding your state of residence and ensure that when you enforce discipline techniques and methods, it should be legal and not against the laws of your state.
Discipline a child is a very sensitive subject and a controversial topic to deal with. It takes great patience and understanding to properly discipline a child. You shouldn’t be too hard nor soft on making decisions. Always be attentive and understanding when you are dealing with a child who requires a lot of attention and help. Most times, kids act out when they’re seeking the attention of their parents, and when that isn’t provided they begin to act out in different ways. Be direct and clear when speaking to your child and what your expectations are in regard to their attitude and behavior. Reward good behavior and compliment good effort, and set down consequences for wrongful actions.