What To Do When The Guy You Like Won’t Break The Ice Himself?
The reason why the 21st century saw a change in the way we view genders is the realization that they are merely social constructs that have been defined by ancient people and are now obsolete. Men were given charge of the socio-economic life and women were confined to their homes to take care of the domestic chores.
Things have changed a lot over time, thanks to growing awareness. However, years of reinforcement of gender roles and their pertinent expectations from men and women would take time before they are unlearned completely. Resulting from eons of conditioning is the disparity that exists between men and women when it comes down to starting and holding a conversation.
Men have been programmed from the very beginning to suppress their emotions and not to put them into words or else they will be portrayed as weak or ladylike. This unevenness can be noted in relationships, where women are more likely to give up because their male partners are reluctant to talk about how they feel.
If you have just started talking to that chocolaty boy whose dreams want you to stay asleep longer or whose face randomly pops up while you are attending that boring lecture as a distraction from the monotonous routine to make you feel better, you might notice that he isn’t as talkative as you are. As elaborated earlier, it may just be a part of him trying to assert the traditional gender role that makes him come off as standoffish or he may not be inherently fond of talking. At times, the silence may be so prolonged that it echoes as a big NO in your head over and over again
Texting or calling?
The most important question before trying to kick-start something that has been dormant for a while is about the mode that you should opt for. Is calling better or texting?
Calling can be a big turn-off as there is no right time to call someone who has not been in contact with you for a while or whose routine is still not known to you. This is because calling someone when they are in the middle of something as normal as dinner may be rude for someone. Also, they can be busy with something important such as an online lecture, a call with a significant business client, with their family, etc.
Texting is a more personal mode of communication. It isn’t a major deterrence for most people and no one is made a party to what you two talk about. Your man crush can do his daily work while texting you at the same time. Hence, if you want to break the ice between you two, the best way would be to text them first before going on to the next step. If he is someone who is shy or has issues that don’t let him be comfortable with someone else, texting will work best. Besides, with texting, you have enough time to think about what you want to say and how you want to say it over messages rather than with calls where real-time communication can cause some problems.
Hot topics to birth and maintain communication?
If you are ready to take the first step to bridge the gap between you two, you need to not only be convincing but also interesting. Only if he has an appetite for a given thing will he continue to stay in touch and want to know more about you.
Here are 25 engaging topics that you can talk about:
1. Zodiac signs
If someone says that they don’t believe in zodiacs and horoscopes, they are lying. You can start by asking them about their sign and then tell them about the traits you think are most commonly associated with their star. Then, you can go on from there by questioning if what you know about their sign is true or not.
2. Favorite musician
Over texts, ask them about their most beloved music artist. You can initiate the conversation by telling them how a certain song reminded them of you and if they have heard the song? Keep texting from there onwards.
3. World tours and other leisurely activities
Everyone wants to travel. You can text them about a video you may have watched about a certain country and if they want to have a look at it too? If they are keen on traveling, they will continue sharing with you other relevant videos or their aspirations about visiting a certain place. Otherwise, you can ask them the same.
4. Aims in life
Asking someone what they want to do with their lives might be the best ice-breaker because most people love talking about it. You can share with your aspirations in order to communicate and keep talking.
5. Bucket list
You can get rid of the silence that hangs between you two by texting them if they have a bucket list aka the things they want to do before they die. This will open up a great many possibilities of communication in the future too.
6. Animals and animal rights
If they love animals, they most certainly like talking about them too. They might as well be vegetarian, to support the cause thoroughly. You can ask them about their pet or if they want to get one otherwise. You can share photos of their favorite animal and other related content to hit them up whenever it gets quiet again.
Especially with the COVID19 wreaking havoc and minimizing meet-ups, movies are our best friends. Share with them your favorite picks and ask them if they have some of their own that they think everyone should watch.
8. Favorite Netflix shows
Need something to binge-watch? Good, now is the time to text them and ask them for their recommendations.
9. Take on the latest NFL season
Soccer and the NFL halftime show will make everyone start talking. Text them during an on-going NFL season, hot news or controversy to make them talk to you like it never stopped.
10. Facebook pages that both of you follow or should follow
If you have been fishing for a reason to text them during this period of radio silence, then you should go to your Facebook and find what is trending. Share with them the link of a certain page, meme or video to start a conversation.
11. YouTubers and YouTube channels
When everything else fails, YouTube remains our only source of entertainment. If you have a favorite YouTuber of your own, you can share their video or content to start talking or ask them if they know about a YouTube channel that you can watch to learn about something you have been looking for.
12. Cars that you love the most and why?
Text them to ask them about their favorite car and the reasons why they chose it?
13. Best events of their childhood
They would love talking about their childhood. Share with them a photo of you as a child for giggles and ask them about the things they loved doing when they were young.
14. What they did in school and college
You can text them a funny meme about school or college to make it less awkward. Then, go on to inquire about their most favorite memories of their time spent in their alma mater.
15. Major they want to opt for
If they are yet to choose a career, then you have a plethora of topics to talk about. Text them about their future plans pertaining to education and the major they wish to elect and why.
16. Relationships and love
This can be a tricky topic to text about, especially if you have a crush on him. Stay subtle and start with simpler questions like if they believe in love.
17. The happiest moments of their life
You can message them to ask them about how they feel today and keep the conversation going on from there before you ask them what was the best time of their life? The details will support the communication for a long time and help you two know each other better.
18. Their best friend and how they found one another
Boys love talking about their best friends and take them to be their brothers. Make sure not to mention their best friend’s name to them if they haven’t shared it with you directly. Start by asking if they have one? Move on from there.
19. Space and cosmology
They may have an appetite for cosmology. Start by sharing a random fact about outer space and ask if they have any interest in what lies beyond our own planet. If they answer yes, then you can keep talking for hours and not get tired.
20. "What would you do if...?"
You can text them a funny scene or circumstance to know what they would do if they were the main role in it? This can also be a moral dilemma or other serious problem except for religion and politics to start a conversation.
21. Their take on the latest literature
If he loves reading, then your best shot is to text them about a book or author and ask their opinion.
22. Talking about their fashion interests and what inspires them
What they love to wear and the color combinations they deem decent can start a light-hearted conversation.
23. Asking them about their guilty pleasures
This is a fun way to break the ice. Text them a funny thing that you love doing to ask them if they have something they hate telling but love doing.
24. Conversing about fitness and workout regimens
Talking about the latest diet trends and fitness regimens will initiate a seamless stream of texts.
25. Quizzing them about the things they would like to change in the way the world operates
No one likes the way the world operates. Text them about an on-going issue to learn more about their point-of-view and ask them if they would like to change anything to make this planet a better place to live? Listen to what they have to say and keep the conversation going by giving your own input.
While silence between two people can be perceived as lack of chemistry or connection, that's not always the case. The good news is, lack of communication doesn't always translate into dismissal. Your crush might just be busy with their life or they may not be very keen to talk to you about a certain topic. Besides, they may be a bit shy or hesitant when it comes to you. No matter what the reason, this article was designed to help you bridge the gap that will eliminate the gulf and boredom hanging between you two and get the conversation going. Good luck!