More Than Friends With Benefits But Not A Relationship. How?

What to do when you are in a complicated relationship with no outcome?

By Diana N.
More Than Friends With Benefits But Not A Relationship. How?

What Are Friends With Benefits?

Have you heard the term friends with benefits on TV shows and movies or elsewhere? Have you been wondering what the term means? Have you tried to indulge yourself in that kind of relationship? Then you need to learn what it means to be friends with benefits. To start off, the relationship is mainly sex-based, and you ought not to harbor any intimate feelings.

Friends with benefits are the kind of relationships where two people become intimate with each other physically. This could be through spending lots of time together and hooking up. However, in this relationship, there is no intimacy; thus, there are no strings attached to it. The "with benefits" helps to do away with any intimate attachments that may result from the relationship.

Additionally, in these types of relationships, you are neither looking for commitment, and neither is your partner. This means that you have to fully understand that the relationship does not warrant for commitments. It's worth noting that this person is not entitled to supporting you emotionally and any other kind of support provided in a committed relationship.

You have to ultimately and clearly explain your connection with the person before starting the relationship. This is obviously to annul any confusion and expectations that may hurt your partner's feelings. If you choose a no strings attached relationship, stay on that lane to ensure the relationship moves on smoothly.

What Is More Than Friends With Benefits?

Now, this is where you start to develop feelings and some kind off attachment in your friends with benefits relationship. Feelings begin to harbor immediately you sleep with someone, and you will agree with me that some of these feelings are uncontrollable.

In friends with benefits relationship, you don't think about your future together. Instead, you have lots of sex and have fun along the way. However, if you find yourself exhibiting signs that you are more than just friends with benefits, do not hesitate to give it a try.

With that said here are some of the signs that show when you are more than friends with benefits:

When You Develop Feelings

As stated earlier, feelings develop as soon as you keep sleeping with someone. When you have feelings for a person, you begin to care too much. You often want to do how their day was, how they are doing, and other little gestures that show how much you care.

Additionally, you find that your partner becomes worried about competition from other guys. He will ask if there is any guy out there that’s bothering you and such kind of questions.

Jealousy Crops Up

When you start catching feelings, jealousy develops, and this is a huge indicator that you have become more than friends with benefits. Hooking up with people is a way of avoiding commitment to one person. However, if you realize that both of you have become gradually desired to each other, then it goes without saying that your relationship has gone to another level.

Everyone gets jealous at some point, but only for people you want to have by yourselves and those that you genuinely care about.

You Are All Over Each Other

Unlike before, where your core purpose was to have fun and sex when you realize that you have feelings for your partner, you start to get over their space. You can't get enough of each other when you are around and apart.

Knowing The Past

You know what your partners dating past was, and so do they. This way, you can tell how you should treat them. In a friend with benefits relationship, you ought not to talk so much about yourself so that you don't get attached. However, when you find yourselves skipping that bit and all of a sudden you want to learn about each of their pasts, then you have become more to the friends with benefits thing.

Questions To Ask Yourself About This Relationship

1. Why Are You Holding On To This Relationship?

The reason you would want to hold onto this relationship is basically if you want to focus on education, career, or finding yourself. It is also appropriate for one who wants to acquire some level of experience, especially in sex, without the whole part about falling in love.

It is a zero pressure kind of relationship because no one is going to commit to the other. Additionally, you don’t feel the sense of loneliness in case your partner leaves because you have no expectations or attachments in the relationship.

This is a great idea for you to carry out sex exploitation. You can still maintain your freedom as you engage in pure sex exploration. This way, you can learn a whole lot of fun that is around sex in a more open and inherent environment.

You can easily detach from this relationship for the fact that no emotions, no expectations come along with the relationship. You can end whatever you have without hurting each other's feelings, and I believe this is one reason you should hold into this relationship.

2. Should You Set Ground Rules?

Ask yourself, the rules you would like to put in place that is before you start the relationship. You don't want to end up losing your friends group when this relationship gets messy. It is, therefore, important to outline some ground rules that you will use throughout.

3. How Honest Can You Be?

This kind of relationship will force you to be as honest as possible. What this means is that you should be ready to stay open about the relationship. Make sure that it is the honesty between you two that governs the relationship. If one of you starts developing feelings towards the other, be honest to communicate. When you decide to get serious with another person, let your friend know so that you can either cut it off or fall in love.

4. Are You Willing To Keep It A Secret?

In most cases, friends with benefits come from a circle of friends. Therefore, it is vivid that you will have mutual friends. The last thing you want to do is to gossip around about your relationship. This is because it will only bring up questions that have a high potential of leading to upsets and disappointments.

Additionally, do not be surprised when friends realize because people cannot always be dumb, and they can smell something from afar. Be honest about it, and always keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with you.

5. How Stable Are You For An FWB Relationship?

You must ensure that you are emotionally stable to be in this relationship. This is because the relationship does not come with emotional attachments. Try as much as you can, not develop emotions and instead be ready to battle your emotions on your own.

How To Go Forward With This Status

Going forward with the friends with benefits relationship is entirely your decision. You may decide to terminate the relationship after a certain time or hold on and move on with the same. It is worth noting that if you choose to cut it off, no one gets hurt since from the beginning, both of you had put in mind that it is only sex-based.

After some time of having intimate sex, it's obvious that you will develop feelings towards each other. When both of you start to develop feelings towards each other, it is recommendable that you go ahead and fall in love.

Most friends with benefits relationships do not end up well, but it would be great if you fall in love with a friend whom you have known for long. You are already aware of the person's desires and expectations when having sex, and what remains is to streamline your relationship and remove all the ground rules.

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Summary

Being friends with benefits depends on you and the person involved, and this may turn out as either a bad or good idea. It is clear that when you develop feelings for each other, it may become hard to sustain the friendship.

However, you can go ahead and become more than friends with benefits. If you are not willing to commit to any person or you want to engage in a relationship that has less to do with emotions, then this is your best kind of relationship for you.

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