11 Signs That Your Husband Hates You But Don't Say Anything

Find out if you are correct and what to do for your future

By Kimmy
11 Signs That Your Husband Hates You But Don't Say Anything

It's Complicated with Your Husband

Love is the hardest language of all. The union of two doesn't always last forever, in fact, in most cases, it doesn't. 40% of marriage in the US end in divorce. What you're experiencing is not out of the ordinary and you shouldn't blame it all on yourself.

Lately, you feel the passion is gone. Your husband seems to be normal but you don't feel the love from him, or even tensions at times. Think he hates you or you're going crazy? Read on to find out more!

11 Signs That Your Husband Hates You

1. He is constantly fighting with you

Couples fight. Your relationship isn't going south because you fight with your husband. But if he is deliberately picking fights with you, that's a sign that something's not right. He starts picking fights over the tiniest things and blows it out of proportion to blame you on something bigger.

He blames you for leaving dishes in the sick and links it to you being unorganized as a person, or when you forget to pick up coffee for him on the way home and he tells you you don't care for him. Clearly something big is the underlying issue if someone constantly blames you over something small.

2. He doesn't want to spend time with you

All the weekend dates cancelled, he'd rather play Animal Crossing than to watch a movie with you. All the excuses don't seem legit. He no longer shows any interest in spending time with you, and he tries to spend as little time with you as possible.

Not wanting to see your face is a huge warning. He is so repulse by you that he would rather stare at the wall than to see you and fight with you.

3. He doesn't show any physical affection

Going straight to the dining room when he comes home from work without a kiss or a greeting, refusing to hug you before bed, not holding your hands in public...Physical affection is important in a marriage. Refusing to show you physical affection means your husband is sick of you somehow and it makes him sick to even hold your hands.

4. He gives you emotional heartbreaks

Words can hurt more than a punch. He would say things to you telling you how you've ruined his life or his career, things that make you feel bad about yourself as a person.

Personal attacks are not a way to fix a relationship. He is only taking out his hatred on you. This is a form of emotional abuse. If he does that, most likely he hates you and doesn't care what you feel.

5. He shows no respect for you in front of people you know

Leaving the table when you're dining with friends and family, publicly scolding you...There's no excuse for disrecpting you in public. Any fights can wait until you two are alone. His erratic behavior is a sign of him done with you. His aciton says it all.

6. He puts no effort in your marriage

He doesn't remember your anniversary and improtant dates, even if he does, he makes no effort in celebrating it with you. When you bring it up, he simply brushes it off like it's no big deal. It hurts a great deal that your loved one doesn't care an important date.

It's not about caring for a date on the calendar but about how much he cares for you. Not showing up for your anniversary dinner shows how little you mean to him.

7. He avoids communication

He doesn't want to pick a fight with you but he knows he won't be able to resist if he talks to you so he shuts all communication. Even if you try talking to him, he will find a way to quickly end the conversation and goes on his way.

8. He doesn't miss you

After years of marriage, it's normal to get used to each other, but it's not normal to not miss each other at all. Does he text you once he has time at work? Or he doesn't even inform you when he is going for afterwork with his mates?

Thinking about you is a sign of affection. He would still want to message you and talk to you even he is away for merely a few hours. Not hearing from him once he leaves home means you are no longer on his mind and something is amiss.

9. He doesn't try to be there for you

You have a family even or high school gatherings and your husband refuses to attend with you, not for a good reason, most likely he is just tired or doesn't like someone there etc. These excuses prove he is not trying to be there for you. Either he doesn't care enough or he doesn't want to be involved in your life.

10. He is happier with other people

Not that he is cheating, but you see his smile so much brighter and genuine when he is around other people. He is more chatty and attentive, things he doesn't show to you anymore. There's no reason for that other than he doesn't like you anymore, or even is disgusted by you.

11. He shares with others his troubles with you

Complaining to others about your bad habits and annoying traits. This is not a healthy relationship. It's okay for him to share with his friends what's bothering him, but taking everything to friends and whining about life with you is utter disrespect.

There's a line in every marriage no partner should cross, and that's taking your hate for your partner publicly all the time. If you can't respect your partner in public, it's not a relationship you should be in and it's obvious how you truly feel about her.

What to Do to Fix the Relationship

Most of the time when things boil down to pure hate, it can't be fixed by you alone. Taking it to a neutral third party like a therapist is the best. There's difference you can't mend yourselves. You probably are sick of his emotional torture while he is sick of you as a person. All those spiteful interactions make things worse.

Consult with a professional, talk openly about your problems, and not to blame each other. If you do want to fix this on your own, go through things you've written down and run it through your head several times before taking it to him. Think about how this sounds in your head, if it's too insulting or involves personal attacks, and how would you feel if the same is said about you.

Getting the other person aggressive is no way to solve this. Although you have a lot of hate in you, it's good to hold it in and talk about facts as they are. Avoid personal attacks. Once you start any personal attacks, likely your husband would too and that won't do anyone any justice.

Find a time and tell your husband you need to have a serious talk about your relationship and if he agrees. Give him some time too to write down what he wants to tell you. Pushing him on spot will likely result in an ugly fight. Talk until both of you are prepared and can be calm about it. 

What to Do to Leave the Relationship

There're times to leave than to fix things that are beyond fixing. Where to draw the line is hard and only you can tell yourself. You should probably leave if you feel emotionally abused or disrespected. Never stay with someone with no respect towards you.

If you're determined to leave, don't engage in any fights with him and blame it all on him as he did to you. Try to be the bigger person in this and calmly tell him you've made up your mind. A mistake lots of people make is to blame it all on their partner. It doesn't add any value.

First, they won't change, people rarely change so what's the point of telling them it's all their fault besides to let your anger out? Second, they might become even more erratic and fight with you, which in turn hurts you even more.

Neither one of those outcomes benefits you, especially you've decided to leave. Plan out how you want things to go and divided and take it to him to see if he agrees. Keep your cool. Don't argue with someone that will never change, nor should you feel the need to educate him. You should leave the negativity behind and don't hold on to the guilt of not being able to change someone. It's never your job to change anyone. One can only change themselves.

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Summary

It's hard to go through emotional turmoil and it's even harder to admit your husband hates you. Sometimes things don't happen for a reason, things just happen. If your husband does hate you, don't blame it all on yourself or on him. It's time to take action, whatever it may be.

Feeling sad about it? Think of the positive side, now you've cleared things up and know for sure whether he hates you or not. Whether to fix it or leave it, that's the next stage. It's better to know the truth and to continue to fool yourself. Eventually, you will find a good solution for yourself.

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