5 Rules You MUST Establish With Your Friend With Benefits

Just like in any other relationship, learn to speak your mind.

By Sophia R
5 Rules You MUST Establish With Your Friend With Benefits

What Are Friends With Benefits?

Is there always such a thing as "No strings attached"? Can a friendship between two people resist casual sex? Or is it just an idealistic concept?

One night stands are not what they used to be. Now people are looking to have long-term sex without having a serious relationship. It's called "friends with benefits." They receive all the benefits of a non-binding relationship; They start out as friends, enjoy each other's company, and then one night they start sleeping together.

What Do They Usually Do Together?

Friends with benefits don't date. It is not a significant relationship. In many cases, other friends do not even know about your sexual relationships. It is created as a mutual gratification, from an agreement between friends.

What friends with benefits don't do is set standards. Usually, it starts off as a fluke or maybe with a little chat: “I don't have anyone either, so let's do it, no compromises. ”It all sounds good, at least initially, when both are turned on. But as friends that sleep together, can you really stay that way once that ends? Or is the beginning of sex the beginning of the end of your friendship?

Sex creates a bond, no matter how unattached you might try to make it. Friends with benefits always start with orgasms as their only goal. However, when two people share this kind of closeness, it is inevitable that someone will end up hurt. We aren’t telling you not to do it, but to be careful with it.

What are some examples of setups between friends with benefits?

5 Rules You MUST Establish With Your Friend With Benefits

One or both of you may not want a compromise, which is why the "No Strings Attached" agreement was conceived. But when expressions like "Oh, I love what you do to me" occur regularly, how can you not begin to feel something? One person will inevitably feel a stronger emotional bond than the other. One will continue looking for love, while the other will want to enjoy good sex, but without bonding, despite the fact that neither was initially looking for a relationship.

For this type of case, it is recommended to develop some rules before entering into any agreement. Check these out:

1. Never involve love

It may sound like a "cliché" to you, however, it is the most important rule. Although this rule is easy to remember, it is the hardest to follow. Avoiding falling in love will protect you from suffering in this relationship and will prevent you from completely ruining this magical relationship.

It is understandable if at some point you begin to feel "something more" or you begin to feel confused about what you want from that relationship. This is the right time to remember why you are only friends with benefits and do not have a stable relationship.

2. Don't text regularly

Establish that it is forbidden to send each other messages to ask how their day is going, what they want to eat, or how they feel at that moment. This will prevent you from getting romantically involved.

Any of you should not under any excuse be each other's shoulder to cry on, so never ever allow it. Always remember that you are only friends with benefits and this means that you will see each other when you want and feel like it for the sole purpose of just sex. 

If you want to be with them, call them or send them a message without a problem, they will agree if the meeting will be at your house or theirs, and that's it! No unnecessary information.

3. No dates

You must be clear that any meeting outside of a sexual encounter is a date, so refrain from making or accepting an invitation to have a coffee, go to dinner, accompany you to do the shopping, help you or help them choose a gift for their mother, etc.

Dating promotes attachment and emotional closeness, this in turn creates feelings, which would undoubtedly hinder your relationship.

4. Never introduce them to friends or family

One of the most common mistakes is to introduce your friend with benefits to your close circle of coexistence.

They will have access to an important part of your life, they can misinterpret a kind of commitment to meet your relatives and feel uncomfortable or they may even love your family and when you decide to move on and stop with the sex, people will not stop asking you: "What happened to your "friend", that nice boy?"

Avoid the headache and unnecessary explanations. Don't make them part of your real life, make them part of your disaster and fantasies.

5. Keep the door open for new relationships

Don't mistake your temporary arrangement for a relationship. You at any time can start to meet someone and can start a serious relationship without warning. It is important that you discuss this point with them and make clear the freedom that each one has. 

What Should I Know Before Being Friends With Benefits To Someone?

Sometimes they have proposed it to you, or at least you have considered having some kind of physical contact with that friend that you find so attractive, but ... why haven't you cheered up? 

It is true that sometimes, having a friend with benefits can complicate things a bit, but you will hardly live the torrid love story they present in the movies. These are generally convenient relationships, in which you only have to worry about having a good time. If you are not entirely convinced, here are some of the benefits of having a friend with benefits you should know before getting one:

1. You will have a fulfilling sex life

Although it is true that you can go to a party or to the movies from time to time with your friend group, the reality is that when you see each other it is to have sex. That's the whole point of having a friend with benefits, so you can forget about the awkwardness of dating and still get the benefits of having the best sex of your life.

2. You will have a relationship based on trust

It will never be the same to go to bed with a perfect stranger than with someone you trust and know you perfectly. By being with your friend with benefits you will feel free and comfortable to enjoy sex and you will also have the confidence to tell them what you like and how you like it.

3. You will have no obligations

Casual relationships are perfect for all those who have no desire or interest in having a stable partner. If you want to see them, you see them, if not, it does not matter because nothing forces you to do it!

There are even those who dare to have more than one friend with benefits at the same time. Why? Because they so can! If there are no commitments, you don't have to date just that person. What's more, if you wish, you can have sex with others. The important thing about this condition is that you have the confidence to speak openly about these things and not put your own health and that of the other person at risk.

4. You will have no routine

Since you will see each other when you want, and the main objective is to satisfy each other, in this type of relationship there is no room for routine. When things in bed start to get boring, it's time to turn the page and call it quits.

5. They will not be any jealousy

As it is a relationship based on trust and sex, jealousy is one of the last things you should worry about, because jealousy is not part of this agreement.

If you dare to try this type of relationship with that special friend, they should make things clear from the beginning. Dramas, jealousy or tantrums are not worth it.

Related Article: More Than Friends With Benefits But Not A Relationship. How?
More Than Friends With Benefits But Not A Relationship. How?

What to do when you are in a complicated relationship with no outcome?


Having sex with friends, without the friendship disappearing or becoming a relationship, is difficult, but not impossible. Much has been said about "friends with benefits" but it has always been a type of conflictive relationship that very few people are capable of sustaining over time. In the end, one of the friends ends up falling in love with the other, if they haven't been since the first moment. Surviving sex with friends is difficult, but it is easier with the tips we gave you, and this 101 on this situation, so lose the fear and have this relationship without fears.


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