Top 15 Signs You're Dating Someone Emotionally Unstable

All of us surely respond to issues and circumstances around us although in different ways and manners. This is one thing that differentiates us from inanimate objects such as stones or papers which are usually insensitive. There are some people that get exceptionally affected or passionate about happenings around them such that they either cry or laugh easily and too often. These ones are said to be emotional. To be emotional can both be positive and negative depending on the situation. A person that is not emotional can be insensitive to another person's plight or struggles. But then, when someone is too emotional, that can lead to them not taking a logically sound decision when it is required of them. When a person is said to be emotionally unstable, what it means is that the individual's reaction to issues is unpredictable. He or she can react to the same situation or event in different ways at different times. The condition can be a behavioral disorder just as it can also be a mere attitudinal defect. It really sucks to be in a relationship with someone that is emotionally unstable. It can be frustrating too. You don't know what to do to please or annoy them. At a point, they may approve of a certain gesture and at another time react violently to the same gesture. And usually when angry, an emotionally unstable partner can be brutal. Emotional instability is not the same as emotional immaturity. The latter refers to a formative phase in one's life where one is still discovering oneself. It is usually transitory. But as for the formal, it has nothing to do with being immature. It often arises as a result of a fault in upbringing or a personality disorder. Before you get into someone or they get into you, it is usually good to first ascertain their emotional stability. Emotional incompatibility is one of the leading causes of marital and relationship break up. If you are confused as to whether your intended partner is emotionally stable or not, check out for these 15 signs to help you determine that.

If the person you are going out with manifests any or all of the 15 signs listed below, they may be emotionally unstable. You would have to determine whether to keep staying with them or not.

Go check out the speech of an emotionally unstable person, it is usually full of lies, needless ones for that matter. Of course, most people tell lies and that does not necessarily make them emotionally unstable. But where the lie has become frequent, uncontrollable, and even unreasonable, it's a big pointer to a personality disorder. A person that is stable emotionally does not tell lies with joy. If they have to give in to telling lies, it's usually with a sense of guilt and remorse. They believe they are good and great and do not need anybody's approval to feel so, hence, no need for telling lies. However, with Mr. or Ms. emotionally unstable, the things that are true this second can be false the next. They are constantly seeking to please someone else and if they find out that their initial position on an issue will not win them the respect or approval of the other person, they don't mind changing it in as many times as possible.

Now, let's get this clear, everyone at one point or the other takes impulsive decisions and that again does not automatically mean everyone is emotionally unstable. But where a person often takes decisions that eventually harm them because they didn't take time to think it through, you can be sure such ones are unstable emotionally. The alarming thing about the impulsiveness of these people's decisions is that it is usually to their detriment. Take, for instance, a partner who is into gambling or who spends without thorough planning and thinking. Such one is likely to consistently find him/herself in a financial mess. An emotionally unstable partner may agree to a contract without taking time to thoroughly study and understand its terms and conditions. They only get to regret later when the contract is now taking its effect on them. They may speak at a gathering where they ought to have kept mute and then their utterances are used against them somewhere else. Therefore, if you notice this pattern consistently playing out in the life of the person you are dating, be aware you are into an emotionally unstable person. It is going to be up to you to decide whether to continue with them or leave.

When an emotionally unstable person gets angry, it's usually a violent one. They often lose control of themselves and can injure people or damage valuable property in the process. One can describe such anger as a foolish one. Of course, everyone gets angry. It's normal because it's a type of emotional response to an unpalatable deed done to us. Where the difference is between someone who is emotionally stable and another who is not is in the manner in which they express or curtail it. For an emotionally healthy being, there is usually a limit to the expression of their anger. They know that even when provoked, there are certain things they should not do. But for the unstable ones, no restriction. They can destroy a whole city (if that's within their powers) during their moments of anger. This is a serious issue to consider when making a marital choice. You surely do not want to be with a person who while being angry, does not mind taking your life or destroying your lifetime investment. It surely takes a thorough counseling and therapy session for victims of this personality disorder to come over it.

An unstable emotion can also lead to an unstable appetite. When your partner constantly says he/she doesn't feel like eating, you may have to watch it. Losing appetite too frequently may be a symptom of that personality disorder. As it goes, when something triggers the feeling of discomfort or threat in them, their digestive system is often stopped and all attention is directed to addressing that threat or discomfort. As such, during those moments, they usually feel they don't need food. With time, this may lead to them becoming too skinny.

Another symptom of emotional instability may be malaise. This is the feeling of discomfort or not being at ease without a cause. You just discover your partner is restless and finds it difficult to stay in one place for a long time. So, check the person you are dating out for this symptom. Do they appear sad or moody most of the time? Please never ignore this symptom. Melancholic individuals are more than other personalities prone to this condition. It is for this reason that they enter depression too often. It may not be advisable having two of such individuals in a relationship or marriage. It can mean that your relationship or marriage may become extremely formal and boring. Howbeit, if you are okay with such setting, you may move on with the relationship.

With time, an emotionally unstable person soon realizes he or she isn't normal. While others are laughing, they cannot laugh. Even in a relaxed environment, they feel awkward and withdrawn to themselves. In order to make up for these lapses, the majority of them resort to either drinking or improper usage of drugs. They want to erase the feeling of being sober or out of place and to them, the easiest way to achieve this is to turn to alcohol or drugs. Those who often become an addict are already aware their condition is a disorder. They are not usually proud of it and most times would do anything to put up an appearance. A careful study of your partner's drinking habit can easily reveal this to you. The addiction can go beyond food, drugs, and alcohol. It can include activities such as shopping, gambling or sex. They just keep doing one thing uncontrollably with the mind of covering up for a defect they themselves have noticed in them.

It may be easy to think of emotional instability as the expression of an extreme negative behavior but there is a subtle symptom of this personality disorder and that is the inability to show emotion as and when necessary. For instance, a normal person would scream at the sight of a horrible scene but an emotionally unstable individual may remain indifferent to such. If you are walking with such a person, you may constantly see yourself as a fool because the things you would expect them to react to normally, they won't. The reason most of them are like this is that they have lost the ability to effectively convey their feelings. Since most of their days have been spent doing things by themselves and minding their own feelings, hardly would it be easy for them to relate to the normal things of life.

When you are dating someone that is unstable emotionally, you'll constantly find yourself weighing, watching and analyzing the words you speak to them. You know they might just get furious at any statement that doesn't seem to go down well with them. You are likely going to say more of "I'm sorry" than "I love you" in your relationship because there will always be something you did not do or say right. That, of course, would make your relationshipboring and full of tension. Just as you read this point, take time to examine your relationship well. Have you had to settle more quarell than enjoying the company of each other? No one is saying anyone should be reckless with their utterances but if you are literaly afraid of talking freely with your partner, chances are that your partner is emotionally unstable.

One undeniable symptom of emotional instability is incessant and extreme fatigue. This is because the emotional disorder is psychological. It has to do more with what goes on within a person than what goes on on the outside. The truth remains that one gets easily exhausted or stressed out for psychological reasons than physical ones. When the mind is cluttered with a lot of heavy and negative thoughts, the brain gets occupied trying to free the mind from such thought. This might lead to getting weak or stressed out frequently. Any personality disorder is usually a challenge to the brain. It doesn't allow it to rest. And in extreme cases, if the emotional instability is not professionally addressed, it might lead to depression and ultimately, death.

The things that go on in our minds have a way of manifesting in the physical. Of course, most of our actions proceed from our thoughts. Therefore, it may be pretty difficult for a person unstable emotionally to be stable relationship wise. Individuals affected by this emotional disorder find it hard to articulate their feelings. At a time, they may be very passionate about their partner, at another time, they just may feel their relationship does not worth it. In some cases, both feelings present themselves to them at once and they get confused. One way to easily notice this symptom is to consider the number of times your partner has broken up with you. In each of these cases, there is hardly a cogent reason for doing such. They may just ask you to stay away from them for a while or look for one reason or the other to stay off. But then in few days' time, they want to be back in the relationship again.

An emotionally unstable person would want to be with someone or a group of people at a time because he or she is afraid of being alone. Somehow, they just feel incapable of leading an independent life. They are afraid they'll make the wrong decision and do not think they can handle anything by themselves. For an emotionally healthy person, being alone at least for some moments is no big deal. Sometimes, we even crave for it. It is at these moments that we get enough time to rest and to also reflect on our lives. In fact, many accomplishments are accomplished when people are all alone to themselves. Not spending time alone to reflect can lead to one repeatedly making a mistake. It one reason emotionally unstable individuals remain so for a long period of time. So, check your significant other for this sign. If they constantly like lurking around people, something may not be okay with their emotion.

Accepting responsibility for one's deed is one of the hallmarks of being stable emotionally. It is based on the awareness of the fact that nobody but ourselves is responsible for what decision we didn't make right. For an unstable individual, every other person is always wrong except themselves. Their partner is usually the one that wasn't patient enough. They find it hard to keep a job because their bosses are usually wicked. In fact, they would have become a better person were it not for the ineptitude of their parents. There is somebody always to be blamed for their misfortune. Actually, there are times when we are not directly responsible for what befalls us. People around us or the circumstances we are surrounded with may have put us in some fix. But when seeing others as the one responsible for our failures all the time, it's a sign something is wrong with us emotionally.

Not being able to sleep when required is something anyone can experience. It is not exclusive to emotionally unstable individuals alone. A lot of reasons can be responsible for this. It can be as a result of an unfortunate incidence, stress, or even depression. However, with time, if nothing is intricately wrong with one's mind, the sleeplessness is bound to disappear. For people with unstable emotion, their minds are usually overactive. While they lay on the bed, their minds are usually wondering about frivolous things. And since their minds are not resting, it becomes impossible for their bodies to rest too.

Forgiveness is a virtue that comes from the heart. Only a mind that is healthy (stable) can manifest it. It requires surrendering one's right and letting go of a wrong done one. These qualities are alien to an emotionally unstable being. They may claim they have forgiven a person but when the thought comes back to their minds, they still carry with them the hurt.

Emotionally unstable individuals live most of their lives thinking somebody somewhere doesn't just wish them well. They are quick to sense abandonment. They are quick to notice someone not greeting them well. They are the ones who read meaning to every gesture most of which are unnecessary. As a result of this way of life, they tend to overreact to situations. Already in their minds, several people do not wish them well. So, when the opportunity presents itself for them to express their anger or displeasure, they often do it to the extreme. Have you noticed such behavior in the person you are dating or someone close to you? You just sit back and wonder if you have offended them before because the manner in which they vent out their anger is just incredible. It's because of a perceived (most times, untrue) hatred.

No one is born emotionally unstable. It is not congenital. It often arises as a result of a lifetime trauma or poor upbringing. If aptly addressed, it can be curtailed. However, if left to continue, it is capable of taking a person's life. It's a good thing to know the state of mind of the person you are moving with so you can know how best to relate to them. If you are going to date a person, it would be necessary to be aware of what you are likely going to meet from them. And determining whether your significant other is emotionally stable or not is what this piece has done justice to.