Are you confused about your feelings regarding your ex?
It is often said that one can never forget their first love. Love is a beautiful emotion and when cupid strikes you for the very first time in your life, the emotional roller-coaster ride that a person goes through is indescribable. The emotions of love are often more docile or controlled when you fall in love again but the first experience is beautiful beyond words. Sometimes, you fall in love with a person who rocks your very persona. You fall head over heels in love and consider your beloved as your priciest possession. Many vows are taken and dreams are dreamt of a beautiful life ahead. But if something unfortunate happens and you break up with your beloved, life never seems the same again. Especially, if it’s your first love, you will always have a tender spot for the person in your heart. But people break up with their partners all the time and move on with life. Sometimes, relationships don’t work and couples separate. The separation could be mutual in some cases and sometimes the relationship ends up on a bitter note. But life goes on and you find another partner in life. But its not easy as it seems for some. Some people find it really hard to forget their ex. It could be the magic of first love or it could be that you still love your ex. If you’re confused about your feelings for your ex, then first and foremost you have got to analyze it yourself to come to a conclusion. The below listed points will help you find out whether you’re still in love with your ex:
1. Do you often try to hang out in the same place your ex does?
This could mean that you still want to be seen or want to see your ex on daily basis. You have not been able to put the relationship completely at the back of your mind. You may have moved on and found another partner but your heart still searches for your ex. Maybe you still love him but haven’t yet accepted the fact yourself.
2. Do you keep checking your ex’s facebook profile?
This means that you’re still curious to find out what’s going on in his or her life. You keep checking their facebook profile to see their recent posts, statuses, updates and pictures with their new partners. You want to know about everything that is happening in their lives along with their new boyfriends or girlfriends. You are often the first person to comment or like his posts and that shows how desperate you are to get his attention.
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3. You try to make your ex jealous
You often try to get really up-close and personal with your new boyfriend or girlfriend in front of your ex in order to make him or her jealous. You behave weirdly with your boyfriend or girlfriend in your ex's presence to make him jealous or angry. But doing so you will only end up making a fool of yourself. This means that you still care about their feelings and want to know if your behavior would trigger any lost emotions in them.
4. You are upset if you ex is seen with a new partner
Whenever your ex is seen with a new partner, you get uncomfortable. You seem to hate their new boyfriend or girlfriend for no particular reason and even try to fight with their partners. You even go to the extremes of warning your ex about his current girlfriend or boyfriend out of jealousy. This could mean that perhaps you are still in love with your ex and cannot see them with another person.
5. You constantly trouble your ex but actually you still love him
If your ex is your husband you seem to constantly trouble him for some mutual responsibilities like kids and their schools. You keep trying to spend more and more time with them under unnecessary reasons. Drunk dialing or texting your ex and then behaving completely cool or indifferent the other day is a sign that you still love your ex but are too hurt or egoistic to accept it.
6. Do you try to get their sympathy or show your love and concern?
You have broken up with your ex or divorced your husband long back. But perhaps you still love your husband. You keep trying to meet him or call him up with your sob stories trying to get his sympathy. Some people cook up extreme stories just to get their ex's attention. This means that you find life without your ex quite tough and your world still revolves around them.
7. You like and comment on all his or her Facebook posts
If you have broken up with your ex and moved on in life, then their life and Facebook posts should not interest you so much. But if you find yourself liking or commenting on all their posts, it could mean that perhaps you still crave for their attention or want to be a part of their world.
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8. Do you keep scheming to meet your ex by pre-planned coincidences?
You may try to make it appear as a co-incidence, but do you repeatedly try to go to the same places your husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend is planning to go? You are always present wherever he parties with his or her current partner. This could mean that perhaps you want to know about everything that is happening in your ex’s life and perhaps you still love them.
9. You often find yourself comparing your current partner to your ex
You have decided to move on in life and but you find it hard to forget your ex. You keep comparing your present partner with the ways your ex used to behave. This could not only ruin your relationship, but also land in you in emotional turmoil. It’s tough to move on in life when you still have lingering feelings of love for your ex.
10. You find the company of your current partner very boring
Maybe you jumped into a new relationship too early and only to prove it to your ex that you have decided to move on life. This act of yours will distance your ex from you further and ruin any possible chances of reconciliation.
What to do if you still have feelings of love for your ex
A) Chances of reconciliation
If you find yourself positively doing all the above mentioned points, then you clearly still love your ex. It takes a while and a lot of courage to accept the fact yourself. After you have decided that you clearly cannot live without your ex, it’s time for you to have a heart-to-heart discussion with him or her. You have to first find out whether they have a new special someone in their lives or they too are missing you like you miss them. You never know – your ex might be missing you the same way as you miss them. An open talk with your ex-partner will help you clear all the past misunderstandings, and you might even reconcile. Getting back together after a breakup can be tough, but if the feelings of love are mutual, you two might end up being in a blissfully happy relationship forever. Sometimes only after a breakup do you retroactively realize that your ex is your soul mate and that you two are meant for and were made for each other.
B) No chances of reconciliation
You soon realize after your breakup that your husband or wife has moved on in life and is very happy with their new partner. They also have new responsibilities, new children and a new life together. You might have to go through hell after the realization that you still love your ex and that there are no chances of reconciliation. When such feelings are only one-sided after a breakup, it leads to a lot of sadness and pain, but there are many ways to coping up with the pain. You can consider shifting your residence, work place or locality. As they say, ‘out of sight is out of mind’; try to move on with your life in a different city where you won’t get to see your ex often. This will help you eventually get over your grief and be open to newer possibilities in life. Seeing your ex daily will prevent you from getting into new relationships.
C) Being friends with your ex
If your relationship ended on a bitter note and you feel too guilty about it, then maybe you can approach your ex and give them a heart-felt apology. Doing so will reduce the bitterness between both of you, and maybe your ex will be open to being good friends with you. This way, even though you won’t get to live with your ex anymore, at least she or he will be approachable as a friend whenever you need them.
D) You’re not being fair to your current boyfriend or girlfriend
Still having feelings of love for your ex is not your current partner’s problem, and it's not fair to ignore their sentiments about it. If you were that besotted with your ex, then you should have not jumped into another relationship so quickly. Your current partner loves you whole-heartedly, but because you still love your ex, you cannot give 100% of your commitment to them. Take some time off, and think clearly about both people and both situations. If you still love your ex, then end the relationship with your new partner to not give them false hopes.
E) New friends
It is a very tough situation if you still love your ex. Try to surround yourself with new friends and well-wishers who will understand your situation and help you divert your mind. Time heals everything. Give yourself some time, and soon you will find that the pain of your past relationship is diminishing. Get into a new affair only when you find yourself ready for it, and do not jump into one only to help you forget your previous one. Such things happen in life all the time. Do not blame yourself for a broken relationship, and find solace in the company of some real good friends.
There are many ways to move on in life after a breakup. You may perhaps find love soon again which will help you forget your old love. You just have to give it time and behave sensibly. Some people are not right for each other. Maybe the relationship was not meant to be, and that's why it ended.