We Can All Use a Little Improvement
Ladies, listen up. If you have found yourself single for awhile, you may be wondering, what is a man even looking for in a woman anymore? This is especially true if are recently divorced or entering the field after a long-term relationship. It isn't easy to figure out what guys want sometimes. We women are complex creatures, and we have our own list of what we are looking for in the perfect boyfriend. However, if you are seeking out information to figure out what qualities a good guy is looking for in the perfect girlfriend, you have come to the right place! This isn't a complete and comprehensive list, and of course, there are some guys out there that will disagree with some of the items that are listed. However, for the most part, a majority of future boyfriends will be seeking these qualities out in you. Take a good look at this list and see how you measure up. If you don't think that you have one or more of these qualities, it doesn't necessarily disqualify you from the dating field; it just gives you a point of reference on where you can concentrate some of your efforts. We can all use a little improvement, and of course, there is no real definition of perfect. We each have our own qualities that men find attractive. However, after asking quite a few men what they are really looking for in a potential girlfriend, this is the list that was created.
Quality #1 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Beauty is at the Top of the List
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. However, most men out there will say that a woman's physical appearance is at the top of the list of what makes them the perfect girlfriend. This isn't to say that looks are the only thing that men look at. You also don't have to be model perfect in order to land the guy of your dreams. There are, however, a few key characteristics that men are seeking out in potential dating prospects. Taking the time to care for your looks goes a long way. Sure, we don't want to have to put the effort in every day, and there are plenty of times that we will be caught in our yoga pants and pajama shirts. However, if you care about your appearance, you will look good even if you are just bumming around.
Not too fat, not to thin, but just right. Taking time to take care of your physical body is not only good for your health, but it is also good for your dating life. When you take time to workout, you bring the best out of your appearance. When you look good, you also feel good. Taking care of your physical body and keeping it at a weight within range is important to a lot of men.
Ladies, if you don't wear makeup, that is great, if you are looking to attract a bohemian hippie for a boyfriend. If you are looking to be the perfect girlfriend, get to know how to use makeup correctly. It can make a huge difference in who you attract. A good guy won't tell you to your face that this is an important attribute, but when you wear makeup the right way, it really enhances your beauty. You don't want to overdo it to the point that you look like a clown, but you don't want to under do it to the point that you can't even tell that you are wearing it. If you need some real advice, there are plenty of videos you can watch online and local cosmetic dealers that have a professional staff that will show you how to apply your makeup. There is nothing like making perfection even more perfect, and it can be done.
Quality #2 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Intelligence
The days of liking a ditzy blonde are over. Sure, they are great for a one-night stand, but in order to make the perfect girlfriend list, you have to have some kind of intelligence. Intelligence is sexy. If a girl is going to college or has a great job that requires the use of their brain, it drives guys wild. Plus, you will be able to attract a good guy that won't be threatened if you are successful. There are several types of intelligence. It doesn't mean you have to be a brilliant, rocket-scientist. However, acting like you have no interest in anything is a real turn-off. There is nothing like a person who can hold a conversation with just about anyone because they have a knowledge about a variety of topics. Men know this, and therefore they are looking out for the ones who have a few smarts in their back pocket.
You don't necessarily have to have a Master's Degree to catch a guy's attention. You can know the hustle. It is like survival of the fittest out there, and it is a dog-eat-dog world. It is having common sense, and being able to talk to people. You have to make the right decisions that will help you get ahead in the world. Street smarts is about knowing how to take care of yourself in a number of situations and applying knowledge. Having some street smarts isn't something that can peg on someone, but you know it when you see it.
Quality #3 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Loyalty is Important to List
Yes, ladies, you have a reputation, and you may not even know it. Loyalty is a trait that is easy to uncover, and men are always going to look at you to have their back. Loyalty is something that is sadly taken out of today's society. People will turn their back on you for the most manipulative of reasons. A good guy is not going to want the woman drama that comes with you pushing the boundaries a little too far. Loyalty is a definitive quality that men are looking for in a perfect girlfriend.
Let's Talk About the Obvious
There is a difference between past and present. If you cheated on someone in the past, chances are, either you learned from it....or you didn't. If you have ever cheated on a good guy, you will have the reputation of being disloyal. Everyone makes a mistake in life, but making it twice is definitely a choice. When you are not loyal — who it makes you as a person is not what a good guy is looking for. In the present, if you are considered the perfect girlfriend by your mate, don't mess it up with cheating on him. This will devastate him. If he thinks you are perfect and you ruin that by crushing his feelings like they don't matter, you will not only NOT be the perfect girlfriend anymore, you will be the enemy. Don't do it. Break it off with respect and be a woman. There is nothing worse than a snake to a man.
There Are Ways to Show You Are Loyal
First off, you have to have your man's back, your friends back, and your family's back. Don't talk crap about anyone or get sucked into gossip. There is no way a guy is going to think that you are perfect girlfriend if one of your qualities is backstabbing. If you are not loyal to all those around you, you can't be trusted. Keep your character proud and true, and it will serve you well. Have people's backs and treat them with respect. Guys pick up on these types of things and are able to notice who will be by their side when they need it most.
Quality #4 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Trustworthy Makes the List
As stated before, there is nothing more a guy hates than a snake. Right under loyal is trustworthy, because they are two completely different things. Trust-worthy goes well beyond just the fear of being cheated on. Good guys are looking for that perfect girlfriend that they can trust not to go through their personal belongings, rip them off or abuse them for cash, or that will go behind their back with their personal secrets. Guy's won't reveal much about themselves at first, while girls like to tell everything about themselves on a first date. What is going to be important, is establishing a level of trust between you and the world. This doesn't mean you have to be naive. The best course of action when you want to know something is to ask. However, don't ask based on the first notion that you get, about everything. If you seem too nosey, he may think that you have an alternative motives for the information. Even if you want to be the one that he can trust the most (because you are that perfect girlfriend) offer to not know information at first. You don't want to know the pin to his ATM card. You don't want to know who he is texting. You will establish trust with him by gaining it. The first time you violate that trust, regardless of what it is, you are risking ruining your perfect image. Guys want someone who will have their back, but that won't stab it while they are there. Trust-worthiness is one of the most important characteristics that you can have. If you are not a girl who can be trusted, and deep down you know that, don't expect to find the perfect relationship. Often, girls are attracted to qualities that they have themselves. You want to be able to trust your man, right? Well, don't you think the same goes in return?
Quality #5 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Confidence is Key
Girls, I can't tell you this enough. You have to have confidence in yourself. There is nothing worse to a guy than a girl who does not have initiative, and who doesn't have confidence in what she is able to do. You have to learn to be strong. The meek don't get very far, and they never get to see their dreams come to fruition. Guys like to have a girl that they can brag about. They enjoy when a girl has the confidence and ability to walk up to a group of strangers and begin a conversation. They like girls who know what they want, and they have the confidence to go out and get it. Guys especially like it when girls aren't afraid to make the first move. You don't need to be loud, obnoxious or narcissistic. You can have confidence just in the way that you carry yourself. You can speak to people without trying to have the attention of everybody. There is a fine line between being confident, and being annoying. You should feel good about yourself. Having a positive mental attitude is closely related to having confidence — one is inside, the other is how you manifest it.
Quality #6 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Positive Mental Attitudes Usually Make the List
How you feel about yourself and the world around you will definitely show in your actions. If you have a positive mental attitude, you have one of the most desired qualities on this list. This is one of those qualities that you can't quite put your finger on, but you know it when you see it. Having a positive, optimistic, can-do attitude makes people around you feel good. There is a difference when you are just fake. People can spot that a mile away. When you genuinely have a positive mental attitude, you are just more pleasant to be around, period. Guys hate it when they compliment you and they are quickly shot down. It is frustrating. Learn how to take a compliment if someone tells you that you are beautiful or smart. Remember to say thank you and try to avoid "I know." Stop putting yourself down (at least out loud). If you are going through such a hard time right now that you can't get a positive attitude, go to a doctor or get some counseling. We all go through hard times in life, and maybe right now isn't the best time for you to be thinking about how to be the perfect girlfriend. On the other hand, if you begin to think more positively, you are going to be more likely to pull yourself out of a negative situation in your life. Having a positive mental attitude is one of the qualities that is also contagious. Misery loves company, and if you are miserable, you may not be on the road to attracting the best boyfriend either. There is a lot to be grateful for, and even if you start by looking at things that exact opposite of how you have been looking at them, things will change. Instead of saying "I will never have the perfect boyfriend," or "I don't have these qualities," change it around. I am sure that you have some of these qualities...and the ones you don't have, you can work on. You are looking to be the perfect girlfriend, and that takes work on your behalf. Once you are perfect girlfriend material, you will attract the right man.
Quality #7 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Being Genuine
There is nothing worse than meeting someone, falling in love with an image of perfection, and then finding out that they are someone completely different later on. If you want to be perfect girlfriend material, the best thing you can do is be authentic and just be yourself. Sure, you have flaws. We all do. Just because a guy is looking for a perfect girlfriend doesn’t mean that they are perfect. You don’t have to change to meet anyone’s expectations. Even if you think that the flaws you have are catastrophic, there is a good guy out there who is going to love you no matter what. You always have the chance to work on any flaws that prevent you from attracting the right kind of boyfriend. Sometimes it is difficult just to be yourself. You want to portray the image that you are a perfect girlfriend. Just remember, above all else, you are just human. You are going to go through everything from bad moods to bad hair days. All men want is to know exactly what they are getting into. Have you ever acted one way around someone and then completely different around someone else? Being genuine does not mean that you are a chameleon and you stick up for your thoughts and what you believe in. A good guy will respect you for that. The element of surprise when it comes to a woman’s character is not always the best thing. If you are looking to be perfect girlfriend material, just be yourself.
Quality #8 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Not Being the Jealous Type Makes the List
There is nothing more unattractive than being jealous and controlling. If you are looking at becoming perfect girlfriend material, you might want to kick those old jealousy habits down the road. When you first start seeing someone, even if you really like them, don’t start the dating session off by giving off jealous vibes. This is a major turn off. You guys aren’t married yet. It is natural for a guy who is in the dating field to check out other options and to have friends that are females. If you want to take it to the next step, you have to show that you can exercise trust for your potential new boyfriend, just like they need to be able to trust you. If you get upset each time a girl calls or texts, or if his head turns when a hot girl walks by, he is going to notice that. No one likes to be controlled. We are all free spirits on this Earth. If a guy picks up that you are trying to make decisions for him on who he is allowed to talk to, how he is supposed to look, or what he is supposed to do, you are definitely not going to be perfect girlfriend material. How do you turn off this switch in your brain? Many times, it comes from insecurity. When you don’t feel like perfect girlfriend material, any other woman is going to seem like they are a threat. What you need to do is focus on developing yourself. If a guy doesn’t end up digging you for the person that you are, then he isn’t the right guy for you anyway.
Quality #9 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Be a Little Feminine
Here is the truth ladies. Guys may like having tomboy girl as a best friend, but not as a girlfriend. Men like to feel like men. You need to leave your tendencies of “being one of the guys” at home and put on the feminine mystique. Burping, farting, fist bumps and other guy-like mannerisms are not seemingly attractive. Sure, guys like it when you are cool... especially if you dig sports and other stuff like that. But if they wanted to date a guy, they would just be gay. A man wants to feel like a man, and therefore, their woman needs to act like a woman. Sitting like a lady, dressing like a lady, speaking and having manners of a lady is important. Going to the extreme of being too high maintenance and always activity like a damsel in distress is not always attractive either. Again, men want to feel like men, but they don’t necessarily want someone who is extremely needy all of the time either. If you aren’t really the feminine type, there are plenty of guys out there who like women who hunt and fish. However, there is something to be said about traditional values and women who cook and clean and take care of household duties for their guys. If you want to learn to be more feminine, there are plenty of things that you can do. There are videos on YouTube on how to act like a lady. You can get professional help with your looks and wardrobe. You can find a woman that inspires you and watch or ask them for some tips.
Quality #10 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: When You Treat Your Man With Respect
Ugh, I cannot stress this enough. Treat men with respect. Don't expect things that aren't realistic. Don't interrupt them when they are talking. If you bring out a bowl of ice cream, make sure you ask if he wants one too. There are so many little things that you can do to treat a man with some respect, and that respect goes a long way. We live in a selfish world in which individuals are out for themselves. It is all about what we want to say, do, etc., without any concern or consideration for other individuals' feelings. Having some respect for people around you is noticeable, honorable, admirable and definitely one of the qualities that men will pick up on if they want to be made a boyfriend. Respect is one of those things that come with common sense. It goes back to the lessons that we learned in kindergarten. Share with others. Keep your hands clean. Say please and thank you. Really, the most basic information you need on these qualities you can learn by asking your five-year-old nephew.
Quality #11 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: A List of Kindness Tendencies
So, this is a little like respect. Except, a little bigger. Respect is often thought of as something that is earned. Kindness is just because it is who you are. Here is a list of ways that kindness attracts guys: A.) Doing things without having to be asked, like picking up after yourself B.) Making sure that you aren't complaining about silly things, like putting the toilet seat down. It doesn't really matter that much. C.) Giving your guy a compliment D.) Offering to help him when he needs it Again, these are pretty simple things, right? Guys are simple people. They just want someone to be kind. Chances are, they have had a bitchy girlfriend in the past. Show that you are different. Show that you have a heart and you aren't afraid to use it for good. Be a volunteer somewhere. Donate change to someone who needs it. Show that your kindness is toward humanity, not just the guy you are trying to make your new boyfriend.
Quality #12 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Girls That Don't Play Games
Alright, so this is a big one. Guys don't like girls who are manipulative or that play games. Duh. No one likes it. Don't beat around the bush. If you are upset and he asks you what is wrong, don't say, "Nothing." Tell him what is up. Manipulation sucks. One of the biggest pet peeves people have is when other's silently ask for something. This means they ask for something without really asking. "Oh, that donut looks really good." Ask for a darn bite already. Head games don't work well with guys. They take things way too literally. Don't expect him to be a mind-reader. It isn't going to happen. The best thing that you can do is just be straightforward.
Quality #13 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: A List of Ways to Dress Nicely
This is pretty simple. Here are the basic ways that you can begin working on small appearance-related things. A.) Start taking care of your hands, feet and nails. Guys love soft hands and feet, and ones that are well manicured. B.) Start doing your hair. Go to a salon and get a style that fits you. Don't have outrageous hairdos. Honestly, guys don't dig (or understand) it. C.) Wear feminine clothing. Wear a skirt once and awhile and get out of those jeans and sneakers. D.) Don't dress too slutty. Some women are modest, and guys really respect that. However, if you are on the hunt for a boyfriend, you can show a little skin. Don't overdo it. Wearing skirts that are too short or a shirt that is too low may be a little attractive, but won't hold a guy down for too long. There are simple things that you can do to help you dress more nicely. Guys really look at your physical body, but they also look at how you take care of it by what you put on it. Don't wear perfume that is too heavy, and keep basic hygienic practices in order.
Quality #14 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Generosity
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Okay, let's be sensible. Especially about money. There is a real fine line when we bring this into being one of the qualities of a perfect girlfriend. There are guys who are looking for women to take care of their every need. It is a great thing to be generous, but remember, don't let this boyfriend you are seeking soak you up for everything that you have. Make sure that you limit your generosity in providing things that you really want to provide, not what you are being manipulated into providing. Be fair about things. Offer to pay for dinner once and awhile, buy him that watch he has been looking at for a while; these are simple things that you can do. Don't however, offer to pay for all his bills each month, letting him ride on your hard work, etc. You can be generous, but don't be a fool. Guys appreciate it if you set the boundary with money. If you are saving money, you don't have to let him know that. If you are thrifty, let him know. Don't expect him to pay for everything. Make sure you can take care of yourself but don't be too stingy. Remember, there is a fine line. You can be generous, just don't get taken advantage of.
Quality #15 To Be A Perfect Girlfriend: Stability
Ironically, a stable woman is a trait that many men look for when seeking out a perfect girlfriend. Although this trait has a number of facets to it, being stable is not only good for you, it is also good for a potential mate. A stable job and stable housing may not seem like much, but a good guy will respect your ability to take care of yourself.
The days of men taking care of women is a thing of the past. There is a real attractiveness when a woman is able to hold down a good, steady job. It isn’t that a man is looking for a woman to take care of them (okay, some are, but these aren’t the men you are trying to attract) but men do like when a woman is able and willing to support herself. It doesn’t matter if you are a waitress or a high-level CEO. Either way, if you have a steady place of employment and stable income, you become a more wanted commodity. You will be much more attractive as a potential girlfriend if you don’t come across as someone just needing a sugar daddy or living off the system.
The same goes for housing. Still live with your mama? Unless she is sick or disabled, this isn’t the most attractive of assets. Having some stability with your living arrangements will attract a good guy. You don’t need to live in a mansion, although to most men living in a comfortable and well-kept house is a valued trait. No potential boyfriend is going to feel comfortable with having to meet your parents right off the bat like it was in highschool. Also, if you want any sense of privacy in a new relationship, living with other people may be a huge mood killer. Overall, just having an essence of stability is a valuable trait that will help you make the list for potential databilty.
How Did You Compare To This List?
Don't worry if you don't think you have all of these qualities. You really do have these qualities, even if you don't believe it. This is a list of what guys think makes a perfect girlfriend. However, remember, you still have a say in what makes a perfect boyfriend, especially for you.