Understand and Cope with the Different Stages of Dating

What are the different stages of dating to a guy and to a woman

By Evelyn
Understand and Cope with the Different Stages of Dating

The 5 stages of dating for a guy

Dating could be awkward sometimes so any help coming your way would be much appreciated right? What about if you have some sort of guidelines to follow? Some people are lucky enough to find a meaningful relationship pretty quickly while others would take an enormous amount of time. What are they doing wrong? Maybe in how they approach dating?

Dating is a process that has different stages, so if you want to navigate its world with some success, you need to understand and cope with them. Men and women may understand them in very different ways (that's the way for almost everything wink)

Let's take a look at the 5 stages of dating a guy goes through.

1. The "checking her out" stage

This stage begins the moment you guys meet a woman. You check her out and if you found her attractive, the cycle begins (she might also be attracted to you). This stage for a guy is very physical, and if the chemistry is good it could be a very intense sexual relationship. You think about her all the time and can wait to be with her again.

It can get a little obsessive but not in a bad way. This stage of dating is really fun and it's really exciting, it seems that your life revolves around her. Your time with her is all that matters, whether is a night out dining and dancing or a romantic night in, all your attention is focused on her and the time you spend together.

But don't get confused guys, this is not the peak of your relationship (and this is where you get dating wrong), this lust and romance stage is going to pass, so don't break it off if this happens, that is, if you want a more serious relationship with this girl. Enjoy it while it last and be prepared to go to the next one.

2. The "I'm crushing on you" stage

Your dating process has grown and you have entered the crushing stage where you are more attached to her. She's still in your mind a lot but things are changing and you think about her in terms of where you two, as a couple, could be going. 

You're getting more comfortable with her and with where the relationship is going. There are fire and passion still but it is tempered by a sense of maturity, you feel like you're growing as a couple and you wish to explore more of this stage. You are still super excited to see her and spend time together and you can't think of anyone else you'd rather spend your time with. 

In this stage, you may find that some changes are happening since you're more comfortable with each other, there could be some adjusting in the dynamics of the relationship. That is totally fine and expected. Enjoy where you're at right now and keep going because you have more stages to experience.

3. The 'making an impression' stage

If you navigated successfully through stages 1 and 2, you are now on the making an impression stage where you want to show the girl all you're capable of doing for her, you want to show off so she doesn't look elsewhere. You start to think of a lot of romantic gestures you can have with her to keep luring her your way.

You start to get to know each other better, you show interest in what she likes and try to find a common ground so you can do things together. Just a quick tip here, don't say you're an expert in say hiking just to impress her (you found out she's into that), always tell the truth and be open to trying new things.

This stage is perfect for bonding with her and is the perfect time to learn and experience new things together. This could be a very exciting stage too.

4. The "Am I ready?" stage

After all the small and very thoughtful romantic details, she has fallen in love with you. That is a good thing, you did something right. But it may seem that you need some kind of reaffirmation, so during this stage, you need to take some time out to put things in perspective and evaluate.

You may ask questions like, Is she the one for me? Do I love her too? Do I see a future with her? It may seem like you got the cold feet but in reality, you're thinking about the future and that shows growth and the need to settle down.

It's important that you go through this stage because then if you choose to continue you'll be making decisions based on what you really feel and want for your future. 

5. The love and commitment stage

If you get to this stage it means that you're convinced that this girl is right for you and that you love her too. This stage can open a whole new world for both of you in terms of your relationship. You feel very excited and content with how things are going.

This stage gives you a sense of safety that can only be beneficial for both of you, You'll want to share more things with her, be more vulnerable and open, all that combined will cause a closeness that didn't exist before.
You feel comfortable talking about commitment and love. Congratulations! smiley

The 5 stages of dating for a woman

For a woman, the stages may differ, what goes inside the mind of a woman once she meets a guy is very different than what goes inside the mind of a man. Women tend to approach dating in a slightly different way, our feelings are involved much sooner, we began to experience a strong affection once we meet a guy we really like.

These are the 5 stages of dating for a woman.

1. The attraction stage

This first stage seems to be the same for both men and women. Most relationships start that way, with a physical attraction. If you see a guy that you like you may strike a conversation with him, maybe flirt a little just to see if he's attracted to you too.

You are in your best behavior, show your best self. You need to show him all the positive aspects of your life, You keep the communication lighthearted and even playful. All this positiveness will increase his attraction to you and dating him will let you explore the possibilities. 

2. The "I'm not sure" stage

You start to question yourself in this stage. You like him a lot, some feelings are starting to develop but you're unsure if he's the right guy for you. Do you seem him as a good partner?  You need to take your time in this stage, give yourself and him a chance because maybe he is your soulmate.

Let it simmer into a relationship. You want in this stage to observe and focus on what he's giving you, what are you getting from this guy (focus on facts only). This can give you perspective and will help you answer the questions you're having.

You may want to seek help during this stage, support from friends or if it's that important, from a dating coach.

3. The "it's time to create a romantic relationship" stage

If you get to this stage it means that you are now sure he's the right guy for you, your questions have been answered. Now you are determined to create a relationship, where you two are exclusive. Now is the time to create positive experiences together.

Some women make the mistake of evaluating him in this stage. If you want things to progress to the next stage you need to avoid this, it's better to focus on bringing out the best in him and in you. This is the stage where you do a lot of negotiation, you're settling into a couple so a lot of adjusting has to be made, a lot of compromises. So use the power of negotiation wisely, do not complain or nag, do it in a positive way. You'll get better results that way and you'll increase your chances of getting to the next stage.  

4. The intimacy stage

When you get to this stage you are prepared to show your most vulnerable side. You can reveal who you are because you're becoming more intimate. You find a way to open up communications so he feels comfortable sharing his vulnerable side too.

Guys sometimes need to pull away from all this sharing, if he needs to do that don't try to stop him, you'll alienate him and he could close up. Let him be, he'll come back, he just needs a little time out. If you don't push, you'll get better results.

This stage is perfect to get to know each other's personalities and experience some of the best times of the relationship.

5. The "I'm in love" stage

When you get to this stage you know that you have found your soulmate and want to commit to him. You are sure of your feelings, you want to spend your life with him. You don't need to rush into marriage instead you can use this stage to build a strong foundation for your life together.

You want this relationship to last a lifetime right? Then use this stage to practice forgiveness, you'll need it in the future and so will he.  

Texting in the early stages of dating

Texting has become the main way we communicate these days and in the dating scene is like the norm. Whether you meet someone online or in person chances are much of your interaction would be via text (at least in the early stages of dating).

Keep your conversations light and flirty and start with a simple "Good morning" or "Good night". This kind of messages always brings a smile to the one receiving them because it means that your thinking about him when you wake up or when it's time to go to sleep. It's simple and totally worth it.

To help you navigate this texting in the early stages of dating here are a couple of rules you should follow to do it right.

1. Don't be elusive

If you like him, tell him. You can text something like "Looking forward to seeing you" or "I enjoy our time together yesterday". Being elusive won't get you another date because he's going to think you're not interested.

2. Treat him like you want to be treated

Playing games is not cool, be you, you know, kind and considerate.

3. Don't make them wait

Text them back. No sooner than 5 minutes and no longer than 25 (unless you can't get to your phone) Making them wait is very immature and you wouldn't want to receive that back right? Show your interest by texting back in an appropriate frame of time.


The stages of dating for men and women are somewhat different, you need to acknowledge them so you can understand them and learn to cope with them.

Trust us, they will come handy next time you meet someone. You'll know what to expect. Good luck out there! wink