15 Ways To Play Hard-To-Get With Your Partner

Why ignoring him might be the best way to get his/her attention

By Sarah
15 Ways To Play Hard-To-Get With Your Partner

In today's day and age, people have perfected almost every art known to humankind, except the mysterious art of courting. There are so many ways to go about pursuing your crush, and every romance novel will tell you something different. So where does one go if they have an enormous infatuation they want to pursue? Do we listen to Shakespeare? Nicholas Sparks or E.L. James? There is no "right" or "wrong" way of seeking love. Each situation and relationship is different, but we have a few tricks up our sleeve that is universally known to catch one's fancy. One of these tricks is a slight play on the natural allure that a mysterious person carries. Your best bet at furthering a mutual attraction is to make them interested in you! Not sure how to go about that? We've got you covered! Here are a few tips and tricks to keep them guessing and keep them involved. 

How Will Playing Hard-To-Get Help Capture Your Significant Other's Attention?

Giving in to your heart's desire and going towards your crush at full speed might seem like the more straightforward thing to do. But trust us when we say playing hard to get is the better way to go about things. Not only do you establish your worth, but letting them work to win you over will make your partner value you much more! This method may take a little more time than bombarding your partner with all that affection you've stored within, but will be much better in grabbing their attention and staying on their mind. After all, who doesn't want to be on their partner's mind at all times?

5 Ways To Play Hard-To-Get With Your Partner Over Text Messages

1. Don't text them first!

Let your crush make the first move. If you want to play hard to get and you want to do it effectively, you have to let your crush realize their feelings for you themselves. Texting your crush first makes you seem too available and too involved! Keep the upper hand by allowing your crush to lead you on. It may seem hard waiting for someone to text you, but patience is vital, and the reward will be more than worth your while. There's nothing as exciting as waking up to a long-awaited text!

2. Don't be too eager to respond so quickly!

You can tell your crush is interested in you through their texts. Your crush being comfortable with you is not good enough. Make them want your attention! Don't reply immediately, answer some emails, and do some chores. Go about your day and respond to your crush's texts in between. Don't make the wait too long though, you don't want your partner to lose interest in you either, but you also don't want them to think you're too available. Balance is key!

3. Don't offer excessive information and tone down the creepiness!

We've all stalked our crushes on social media now and then. It's completely natural to be curious. However, make sure your crush doesn't know about all the information you've gathered on them! Creeping them out before anything has even begun is the last thing you want to do. So keep everything you've learned about them to yourself and let them reveal whatever they want to you slowly and at their own pace. Also, don't tell everything about yourself all at once! Keep the mystery going, let them wander a bit and only let them on little by little so they stay interested!

4. Don't be over-friendly

To seem more approachable and to fast-track a relationship, we often make the mistake of being too friendly. You have to look genuine and easy to talk to, but being over-friendly works to your disadvantage. Maintaining some small bit of formality in your texts will make your partner think about how they're talking to you and what they're saying. They will be more conscious of their words and how they come across to you. 

5. Keep it fun and flirty!

Keep all conversation, light, fun, and flirty! Don't overdo the flirtation in case you seem to be coming on too strong. Remember, a little goes a long way. Keep your sentences open-ended, talk about your interests, and take a keen interest in what they have to say. The whole vibe of your conversation should be comfortable, casual, and funny! Work towards achieving that and don't sweat the small stuff too much. After all, you need to be able to enjoy the conversation for it to lead to anything. 

5 Ways To Play Hard-To-Get That Work!

6. Make your crush work for it! Don't be too eager to give in

Apply this mantra everywhere in your approach towards your partner. Making them work for it will make them value you much more than if you throw yourself at them. If they don't seem too keen, don't worry about it. Your indifferent attitude will keep them trying their best to impress you. 

7. Work on yourself too!

The more you value yourself, the more others around you will too. Know your worth! Think of yourself as the prize and if someone isn't putting in enough effort to win you over, then they're not worth your time. Work on yourself for yourself, even in everyday life. This will eventually translate into how you interact with others, including your partner. Self-esteem is a very sexy trait to have; make sure you use it well. 

8. Don't tell him you like him just yet! Only work on the vibe between you two

We repeat. Do not throw yourself at them! Work on understanding them and your relationship with them. Work on improving the vibe you guys share. Let them make the first move, be patient but open. Telling your crush, you like them before they're sure about their feelings may just ruin everything before it's even started. 

9. Find the perfect balance between space and affection

Make sure while playing hard to get you don't appear completely uninterested either. This will make them lose interest in you since all their efforts will seem futile. Being too affectionate is a big no as well. Find balance in your interactions with your partner. Keep the conversation flowing. Dropping a few compliments here and there won't hurt as long as you keep the compliments rare otherwise. Don't make yourself seem too available, but not too aloof either. Make sure they know you have a life outside of your interactions with them and that they aren't the center of your attention. 

10. Casually mention some of your other friends

If someone likes you, they may get jealous. Use this to your advantage, casually mention some of your other friends, so they know they're not the only important person in your life. Be open and casual, but don't make it an agenda to make them jealous. 

5 Ways To Play Hard-To-Get On A Date!

11. Flaunt yourself!

Put your best foot forward if you've been invited on a date or casual hang out with your crush! The better you look, the better you feel, and that shows in your actions and speech as well. The better you look, the more attracted they will be to you. However, don't make it too obvious that you got ready just for them. Be subtle, and look gorgeous!

12. Slight accidental touches

Being too handsy is never a good option, lest you creep them out. But slight touches on the hand or shoulder, or the accidental arm grazing might just do the trick into making them, comfortable and getting them to notice you. 

13. Confidence is key

Be confident. You have everything going for you. You're intelligent and good looking, and you need to believe in that for it to show as well sincerely. Your confidence in yourself will establish your importance and the fact that you are an absolute treasure to have! 

14. Know your priorities

Keep your priorities in order, and by that, we mean to make sure your crush isn't at the top of that list! Your conversance with them is important but it should never be the only thing on your mind at all times. Find other activities to focus on simultaneously so your mind too preoccupied to think about them all day. 

15. Let them make the first move

Don't be the first one to make a move on your date, either! Hold off on calling them over. Let them make a little more effort before you open up a little. For now, make them work for it and not the other way around. 

Related Article: How To Play Hard To Get That Will Always Work
How To Play Hard To Get That Will Always Work

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play hard to get and catch the eye of your crush? Well, we have some tips that will work every time!


If you believe in being completely upfront about your feelings from the get-go then playing hard-to-get might not be the thing for you. Not everything works well for everyone, but if you don't mind being a little patient and watching your partner work to get your attention then playing hard-to-get is definitely worth a try. It's a fun, flirty way to test the waters and get an idea of the depth of your partner's feelings towards you as well. If all goes well your hard-to-get attitude will have them gravitating towards you in no time!


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