Why Am I So Horny? Should I Embrace or Curb It?

Find out if it is normal and what to do if you are always horny

By Hana O.
Why Am I So Horny? Should I Embrace or Curb It?

Feeling horny or turned on is a normal occurrence for both men and women. It starts when we reach puberty and become more aware of our body developments. Then there are the hormones which make the urges go on overdrive. Those who constantly feel horny might wonder if it's healthy, especially if they compare themselves to others who don't experience the same thing. Let's take a closer look to see if this is an issue that needs to be addressed, shall we?

Is It Normal To Be So Horny?

Not everyone is created the same; we know that for a fact. There are people with a naturally higher sex drive, hence feel horny more frequently than others. And this pertains to women as well. We might have society stating that men have stronger libidos than men, but that is not always the case. Women just don't go bragging about it as much and avoided the creation of the stereotype.

There are many reasons to feel horny; in fact, women have more external or internal factors at play that lead to sexual desire.

1. A new relationship

We all know the feeling of utter bliss and butterflies in the stomach (or further down there) when in a new relationship. Everything is fresh, you're discovering new things about your beau and want to do more exploring at the most intimate level: the bed.


It's not just the emotions at play here; there are hormones going on overdrive during the honeymoon stage of a relationship. The love molecule known as neurotransmitter phenylethylamine or PEA is a stimulant that gets activated in the brain and works with dopamine, the hormone responsible for feeling pleasure and getting addicted to it. Add these two together, and you have the dizzying "I-feel-like-I' m-back-in-high-school" sensation of a new relationship.

2. Pregnancy

It is also normal for libido to be increased during pregnancy. There is a spike in hormones during this period which can lead to a heightened sex drive. And it's not just for you – your partner is also affected by the changes and would share the boosted desire for sex during pregnancy.

3. Stress

Some women experience an increased sex drive when stressed or anxious as a way of release or momentary escape from harsh realities. The feeling of satisfaction after a climax is quite addicting and an excellent medication for anxiety, as long as things stay safe.

4. Menstrual Cycle

Women also feel extra horny right before their period hits, like a day or two before the big day. Before a woman's period, the pelvis is congested with fluid which could trigger arousal. Meanwhile, there are those who experience changes during the middle of their cycle, around the time of ovulation which is the moment when a woman is most fertile and could conceive. It's only natural for the body to turn things up internally and hormonally as a way of boosting the chances of procreation. 

5. Puberty

We have puberty as another natural reason for an increased sex drive or arousal. Genitals are tingling, the vagina is wetter, and blood flows to the vaginal walls making you feel sexually aroused and hungry for something new and undiscovered.

6. Alcohol

Although alcohol is known to be a depressant that could interfere with sexual functions, it does loosen up one's inhibitions which leads to more frisky activities compared to the usual times when urges were suppressed.

7. Medication

Certain types of medication dull the sex drive or make it difficult to become aroused such as antidepressants and antihistamines. Stopping the intake of these medications will bring the old libido that got curbed.

8. Food

A more natural source of heightened sexual arousal is food. Aphrodisiacs are food that boosts the sex drive. Examples are chocolate, oysters, honey, saffron, pistachio nuts, and red ginseng. One would be surprised by the sexual urges after a big serving of oysters, especially if the body is not used to the ingredient and experiences it for the first time.

Embrace or Curb?

More often than not, being horny or feeling turned on should be embraced because it is a regular and natural occurrence.

Some signs of being horny include:

Thoughts about sex

One who is horny will have sexual thoughts and fantasies. You can't stop thinking about sex, the wanting of it, the actual intercourse, and everything that relates to the activity.

You're restless

When someone is horny, they are "more awake" awake than others because their sexuality is turned on. This could lead to difficulty in sleeping or focusing on other activities. Meeting a new guy and having that desire to see him naked beside you or even fantasizing what your long-time crush would look like naked would preoccupy your attention and keep you restless.

Your genitals feel all tingly

While feeling horny and thinking sexual thoughts, your body would definitely respond by becoming tingly, the nipples sensitive and aroused, the vagina wet and lubricated.


Being horny is perfectly normal; however, when we're sexually frustrated, we become more stressed and anxious. One way to gauge if feeling horny should be embraced or curbed is by observing and weighing the effects. As long as it's not getting in the way of our daily activities, why not embrace it?

Ways to Embrace Being Horny

Embracing being horny goes beyond accepting the urges and desires because those won't disappear until released and satisfied. There are a few ways to embrace one's horniness if you feel like wanting more.

New toys

Countless toys on the market could help quench that sexual thirst such as dildos, vibrating rings, and whatnot. Chances are, you'd be surprised by the pleasure they bring and question why you've never tried them before.

More sex

Of course, one way to embrace one's sexual arousal is to have more sex. More sex yields more horniness, which could only be quenched by even more sex. It's quite an exciting cycle, isn't it?

Explore with your partner

Embracing being horny with a partner is another exhilarating journey to embark on. Jot down each other's wildest fantasies into a rated x bucket list and fulfill them one by one together.

Discover yourself more

Masturbation is another way to accept one's horniness and get the release needed. To avoid feeling down or ashamed at the end, try implementing a positive outlook and enjoy the whole ordeal instead of seeing it as some quick relief.

Ways to Curb Being Horny

If you feel like being horny has gotten in the way of your daily schedule or has placed a strain on your relationships, then below are some ways to limit or curb the urges.

Change of diet

A simple way is to cut down on the aphrodisiac food, such as those mentioned earlier. This includes any food or beverage that you've seen heightens sexual arousal.


Being horny is sexual energy that could be channeled and transformed into another form of energy without having sex. Exercise helps in releasing any built-up tension caused by sexual arousal.


A more peaceful approach to handling horniness is meditation, where we learn how to control desires by taking control of the mind. There is so much self-revelation and realization that could be achieved through meditation.

Regular sex

It may seem counter-productive, but having regular sex could help in bringing down horniness levels, especially if they tend to get out of hand. When the body knows it's not going to be deprived, it won't go into survival mode. The same thing goes for masturbation as a way to curb being horny.

Relax and rejuvenate

Like exercise, try to shift your attention from the sexual thoughts to other things you're passionate about, such as art, music, dance, yoga, and so much more. It's all about finding time to relax and rejuvenate instead of being weighed down by feeling horny.

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Being horny, having those urges and thoughts of sex is normal and not something to be worried or ashamed of. Everyone feels it, and there isn't a standard or level that defines too much or too little of sexual desire. The goal is contentment and satisfaction in life, which means no one else has a say on something as private and subjective as feeling horny but ourselves.