What Are Fake Friends
If you’ve come across this post, the chances are that you already know that some of your friends might be fake, and you’re just trying to validate that tiny voice in your head that’s telling you to cut them off. Well, fake friends can be defined as friends who go against everything that friendship stands for. They bring you down, hold you back, nag, and in short, are the consequence of all the negativity in your life. However, fake friends are often smart and hide their contemptuous actions behind a fake smile and unauthentic concern, so you have to be smart. Here mentioned below are a few ways fake friends are impacting your lives.
How Fake Friends are impacting your Life
1. They’re holding you back
Friends are meant to let you grow and have new experiences, so if you find yourself always being held back, you should try to find out why. Fake friends don’t want you to prosper in life or become a better version of yourself, so they deliberately put hurdles in your way, so you make the wrong decisions. However, you should know that their intent can be shrouded in care and love. Know that someone who loves you lets you make mistakes so you can learn, make friends, hold you back by putting uncertainties in your mind, and making you doubt yourself.
2. Bringing you down with negativity
Bad friends are poisonous; as nice as they might seem to be, they can’t bear to see you be more successful than they are. Everything is about them. When you tell them about something good that happened to you, they become bitter and resentful about your happiness and instantly try to tell you a story of something that they did, which was better. When something terrible happens, and you talk to them about it, their first instinct is to top it with something more tragic that happened to them because they don’t respect you enough to listen to you. If you’re friends with a person like that, it’s best to walk away. That is the best you could do for both of you. Because by putting up with friends like that, you are enabling them to behave the way they are, so master the courage and walk away.
3. Mental discomfort
I can tell you from personal experience that bad friends can cause you so much mental turmoil that you become miserable, and if you’re friends with them for long enough, you realize that there is a burning resentment inside of you. You know that your friends are the source of your discomfort, but you can’t seem to walk away. Every second that you spend with them, you feel absolutely miserable. This starts taking a toll on your personal life because no matter what you want, your friends are there to hold you back and give you a million reasons not to do so.
4. Taking advantage of you
Bad friends are very manipulative. When you're friends with someone, you trust them very deeply. Bad friends exploit that. They would ask you to do things that you don't want to. You hear these stories of kids becoming drug addicts because of their friends all the time. If someone has your trust, it is the easiest thing in the world to manipulate you. You let your guard down around your friends and they jump at that, they know that you can be taken advantage of when you're at your most vulnerable. They use words as tools, they use words to get what they want from you, and you don't even realize that you're being manipulated. All you see is a sincere friend, you don't see what monstrosity is under that mask of sincerity. Such friends are the most dangerous, they are narcissists but they are really smart about it, you don't realize that, and keep getting manipulated over and over again.
5 Reasons why you are keeping your Fake Friends
Another thing you should keep in mind is that fake friends are very manipulative. When you're friends with someone, you often trust them very deeply, and fake friends exploit it. They might ask you to do things that you don't want to. You hear these stories of kids becoming drug addicts because of their friends all the time. If someone has your trust, it is easy to manipulate you.
You are bound to let your guard down around your friends, and fake friends will jump at the chance to take advantage when you're at your most vulnerable time. They use different tactics to get what they want from you. All you see is a sincere friend; little do you know that they are the devil in disguise. It's only when you find yourself in trouble that you understand you're all alone with just one question in your mind, "how did I end up in this situation."
1. To make them better
We, as humans, have a tendency to try to fix what is damaged. As messed up that might be, you might be keeping fake friends around so that you can fix them, make them better people. However, you should know that you don't owe them anything. Toxic people stay the way that they are; you as an individual can’t help them when they don’t want to be helped. Always remember that you should be your first priority.
2. To gain some kind of benefit
Sometimes we keep fake friends around because their presence entails some benefits. For example, if you have a fake friend who’s a blogger and she gives you some of the stuff she gets which is why tolerating her can sometimes be less painful. But the question is why? At what cost? You listen to her nag and pull you down because you want some free stuff? Come on! You know you’re better than that.
3. For self-validation
Sometimes having rich, intelligent, or famous friends gives you validation. In this age of social networking, we care more about our social media presence rather than our actual lives or selves for that matter. In the race of being seen with the right people, going to the right places, and uploading the right pictures - our vanity has gotten the better of us. If this is why you’re letting someone else’s toxicity affect you, you need to be brave and take stand-up for yourself.
4. To not be alone
In this world that we live in, being alone is looked down upon. The concepts of serenity and self-discovery are lost to our generation, and therefore, we surround ourselves with people that we know are bad for us. We would rather be with fake friends than be alone in a room. Know that if you’re settling for a toxic friend just to not be alone, you’re filling up a place in your life that could be filled with a healthy and lasting friendship. But you will never know unless you break out of this illusion and look for other friends.
5. Because you're afraid of change
We as people are also afraid of change. For example, I found out that my childhood friend was actually a fake friend disguised as my best friend. She was a snake and she let me down at every turn, but somehow I just couldn't imagine my life without her. I was afraid of making such a big change in my life so I let it slide till it got worse, and I just couldn't take it anymore. It was only when I got rid of her that I could see everything more clearly around me.
If you find fake friends in your midst, get rid of them ASAP. While some reasons may seem worth it to you today, know that as time goes by, you'll realize that there's no reason good enough for you to go through torture. Your mental and physical health is worth more than any fame or money. Know that the damage is irreversible, and once you pass a certain stage in life, you’ll know that you can't put a price on mental health. Always know that no friends are better than fake friends.