10 Ways To Stop Feeling Lonely After The Breakup
Life after a breakup can be a very lonely affair. That said, learning how to get rid of the loneliness can help you move on to a happier, more productive life.
Jul 24, 2018
How to stop feeling lonely after a breakup?
Everyone needs to learn how to get over an ex with the least amount of struggle possible. This is because at some point we all fall in love and date, but in the end things end up not working out. That’s when we’ll be faced with two options – to either stick in a toxic relationship or move on. Unfortunately, there is a good number of people who don’t how and when to move on after a breakup. And the number one reason for this is none other than the feeling of loneliness. Also, people who feel lonely after a breakup do so for a number of reasons. One of these reasons is living alone after a divorce especially from a long-term relationship that bore no children. In this case, adjusting can be tough but totally achievable. Therefore, it’s critical to always remind yourself that if other people managed to move on while under the same circumstances, so can you. If you have no idea on how to survive the loneliness, you can always get your hands on a comprehensively written breakup survival guide. There is a plethora of ideas on how to move on after a breakup as well as make friends in case you have no friends and so on. These very helpful guides can also shed some light on a number of activities that’ll help you get rid of that lonely feeling. Thankfully, these guides happen to be pocket-friendly and are available in both softcopy and paperback – all depending on whatever floats your boat. And if you don’t mind the hourly fees, then I don’t see why you should write off paying a good psychiatrist a visit. A qualified shrink will have a personalized approach to your case which will be much more beneficial to you. Just make sure you are implementing every piece of homily they are giving you and you’ll end up doing just fine!
1. Avoid feeling lonely by learning a new language
Feeling lonely is bad for your health and no one should ever want to find themselves in such a situation. To avoid feeling lonely, you’ll be required to try new things as soon as your breakup is official. One of the many activities you can use against loneliness is learning a new language. If you’ve always wanted to learn Spanish but never had the time - because you were busy surviving in an unhealthy relationship – you can seize the opportunity and do just that! You’ll have a lot of fun learning the new language instead of brooding over a breakup. A breakup is a learning experience, not a mourning period. Apart from learning a new language being fun and all, attending these classes will serve as a platform for you to make some friends. This can be a good way to avoid dredging up feelings of hurt especially if you are living alone. Feel free to invite your classmates over and bake them some cakes, watch movies and what not. Heck, pop a bottle of whiskey and get back in the game! It has been proven beyond reasonable doubt that learning a new language will make you move past the breakup or divorce without you even knowing it. It will also boost your survival skills especially when you find yourself lost in China. I know this might sound funny, but wait until you find yourself stranded in China and the only language you know is gorilla sign language. So yeah, go take up that Chinese class while you still can! Thankfully, learning a new language has been made easier because there are plenty of classes offering this new skill set near you. All you need to do is look and you’ll get yourself enrolled as soon as you deem fit. Remember to make the internet your friend because you’ll also have the option of enrolling online.
2. Avoid being lonely by hitting the gym after a breakup
Hitting the gym especially after a breakup is always a good idea. This’ll do you some good because it comes with a surfeit of benefits. But first, you’ll need to find a good guide especially if you are new to the world of fitness. And by the time you’ve known the ropes, you’d have forgotten all about your ex, the heartache as well as the loneliness. Apart from the gym instructor ensuring that your lonely days are over, you’ll come out looking like an underwear model. In the gym, you’ll also meet some awesome, goal-oriented people who will increase your value physically, mentally and spiritually. On top of everything else, you will also get the pain and hurt out of your system by hitting those punching bags as hard as you can. Your diet will also become cleaner since no friends that are about that gym life will let you eat junk. Thing is, you’ll never feel lonely the moment you enroll in the gym especially after a breakup. And just like it is the case with your language learning squad, you can always invite your new gym buddies over whether you are living alone or not. Living alone shouldn’t be a pretext for you to be lonely especially after a breakup. Once again, finding a good gym to enroll in is a very easy and fast affair. All you need is locating the searching button on Google and you are good to go. I would recommend finding a good gym within your area and one that you’ll feel most comfortable in. Once you have found one, try as much as you can to commit to the workout routine. That way, you can’t find yourself using a breakup or living alone as a pretext for staying lonely.
3. Go on dates to avoid feeling lonely after a breakup
Another effective way to avoid being lonely after a breakup or divorce is by getting back in the game. You don’t have to be completely over your ex in order to go out on a date. You can start by going on dates with your close friends or family. This will help you move on while avoiding the feeling of being lonely. Locking yourself in the house and mopping over a dead relationship will only make you depressed. Getting out and seeing other people and generally having a good time is the first step of moving on after a breakup. Seeing just how beautiful life is without your toxic ex will entice you to go out there and enjoy it while you still can. Feel free to pick up any “Life After a Breakup Survival Guide and you’ll definitely understand what I am talking about. If you have no friends to go out with, feel free to take yourself out on a date. I know a lot of people might find this a bit awkward and it’s understandable. But if you want to be happy instead of lonely, then understand that happiness and self-acceptance start from within. Besides, taking yourself on a date after a breakup will also give you the opportunity of meeting new people among them, potential girlfriends/boyfriends. And whether you choose to believe me or not, there are thousands of single people praying to meet someone as awesome as you. Therefore, instead of crying over spilled milk, how about you take a hot shower, dress to kill and take your goddamn sexy self out on a date. Who knows, you might end up being approached by some hottie who finds you hella attractive.
4. Find roommates to avoid feeling lonely after a breakup
After a breakup, and under specific circumstances, you might find yourself living alone. This can be detrimental to your health because living alone can be dicey. The case is much worse especially living with an ex for too long before the breakup or divorce. For that matter, looking for people who can help you fill the void is highly advised. But be advised to take this process as seriously as possible, for your own sake. The first thing you need to do is finding people oozing with positive vibes only. Feel free to seek advice from any comprehensive, well-written survival guide and you’ll learn a hell lot when it comes to picking the right roomies. You already know the kind of friends or family members who reeks of positive vibes, reach out to them. Never take this for granted because your healing will highly depend on the kind of people you choose to surround yourself with. If possible, find roommates who don’t drink or gossip. Having such people around will only make you feel lonelier than ever. Moving in with family/friends who are into healthy living habits is always a plus. They will help you stay physically and mentally strong while avoiding the contagiousness that comes with feeling lonely. If you have no friends, consider asking a cousin or sibling to move in with you. The good thing about family is that they always stick together through thick and thin.
5. Go shopping after a breakup & feel less lonely
Whether with friends or alone – in the event that you have no friends – shopping does feel hella good! And just like it is the case with happiness, you don’t really need a reason to go shopping. Therefore, instead of feeling lonely after that nasty breakup, maybe it’s time you considered going out and sampling a couple of new stores. You can start by getting rid of the old stuff that reminds you of your ex and by all means replace them with new ones. Moving on from a breakup involves undergoing a lot of changes and you should, therefore, embrace it wholeheartedly. Contrary to popular belief, shopping doesn’t really need you to have a ton of money at your disposal. You can start by visiting your local thrift shop and pick out some stylish outfits for cheap. If you are living alone after the breakup/divorce and don’t know a darn thing about shopping, fear not. There are knowledgeable and super friendly attendants in every shopping center that can help you enjoy a simplified shopping experience. Also, shopping doesn’t mean that you have to leave the house. You can start by checking out some online stores if you are too lazy to leave the house. And once you spot something that tickles your fancy, feel free to make a purchase and have it shipped to your doorstep in a matter of business days. Personally, I wouldn’t recommend online shopping because staying indoors does little to combat loneliness especially after a breakup. The point of going shopping is to avoid being confined. And even though online store merchandise can keep you distracted for a jiffy, going out shopping out of your home will be much more exciting and fun!
6. Get a new hobby, avoid feeling lonely after breakup
Apart from learning a new language and hitting the gym, a good Life After a Breakup Survival Guide will also advise you to find a hobby. The hobby should be something that you love and can enjoy with friends or even alone with no friends. Thankfully, there are plenty of hobbies you can adapt and become the happiest single human on earth. For instance, if you love music, it wouldn’t hurt for you to learn how to play an instrument. Since time immemorial, writing has been known and praised for its therapy especially after a nasty breakup. In short, always remember to acquire hobbies that’ll make you will improve your quality as a person long after you have moved on from your heartbreak. Feel free to take up a cooking class if you have a thing for cooking. The good thing about taking up cooking as a hobby is that you can never learn how to cook everything. This means that you’ll always stumble upon a new recipe every day. And this will go a long way in helping you keep busy instead of wallowing in loneliness. And just like in gyms, cooking classes usually have a throng of interesting people you can mingle with. Painting is also another hobby that can help you express yourself instead of sitting in a corner at home feeling lonely. There are plenty of art experts near you and it wouldn’t take long before finding the perfect mentor for you. Therefore, if you can’t the perfect hobby, don’t be afraid to ask for help. You’ll be surprised how brilliant your friends are when it comes to finding the perfect hobby for you. Make sure you are asking people who know on a personal basis so that they can help you find the perfect hobby.
7. Travel the world after a breakup to avoid feeling lonely
Traveling the world after a breakup is highly recommended especially if your goal is feeling less lonely. Travelling is highly recommended especially when living alone and have the money at your disposal. After the breakup, you can always kill off the feeling of loneliness by looking for the best, most affordable destinations online. The world is a beautiful place and you’ll be surprised just how therapeutic it is to visit a totally different place, meeting totally different people. If you are spoilt for choice when it comes to your next destination, worry not! You have all the time in the world now that you are single and ready to mingle! And as you are looking for these destinations, always remember, you have to focus on your budget. And if you have no friends to string along, seeking the help of a good traveling agency is always advised. A good travel agent has the knowledge on all the best, most affordable airlines and hotel rooms. If you are lucky enough, your travel agent can always hook you up with some of best rates you can find. So, you should always swallow your pride and let a good agent help you out. You can also do your own research and buy the best outfits suited for your next destination. Before you know it, you’ll be elated with so much excitement you wouldn’t have time to marinate and feel bad about the breakup or divorce. Again, get your hands on a proper breakup survival guide and you’ll learn a hell lot about traveling the world!
8. Moving after a breakup prevents feeling of loneliness
At times, feeling lonely after a breakup might be as a result of everything being a constant reminder of your ex. For instance, your house bears a ton of memories of you and your ex. The same applies to the places you’ve frequented as a couple. Such aides-mémoires can make anyone feel lonely even when surrounded by other people. And the whole scenario is exacerbated when you are living alone after a nasty divorce or breakup. The first rule from the breakup Survival Guide suggests getting rid of all things that remind you of your ex. But this rule has its limits because let’s face it – you can’t get rid of an entire house! If that’s the case, you can still take another step to ensure you are moving on without feeling lonely. If possible, just pack your belongings and move to another place if you can. A fresh start will facilitate a more effective way of severing ties and moving on swiftly. You can also meet new people, start a new life and even fall in love with someone much more deserving. You should, therefore, consider moving especially if you have no trouble moving and putting down roots elsewhere. You ought to also check your finances before moving because it can be costly especially if not well planned. Moving is indeed a drastic moving. But you cannot put a price on your happiness and by extension, your health.
9. Adopt a pet to avoid feeling lonely after a breakup
The After-Breakup Survival Guide also mentions getting a pet as a very effective way of dealing with loneliness after a breakup/divorce. Getting a pet is salutary especially if you have no friends or are living alone. Talking to your puppy or kitten (or praying mantis) has been proven to distract one from the pain and regrets that are the hallmark of a failed relationship. It is, therefore, a brilliant idea for you to consider adopting. Thankfully, there are plenty of pet stores and animal shelters you can visit. I must warn you that pets are extremely adorable and you are likely to be spoilt for choice. Thankfully, there are attendants who’ll help you make what would probably be the hardest choice in your entire life. Too bad you just can’t take every pup home. Once you have your pet, your hands will be so full you won’t even remember the name of your ex or the date you signed your divorce papers. And that’s definitely the best way to move on and be much happier without ever feeling lonely after a breakup.
10. Volunteer to avoid feeling lonely after a breakup
Feeling lonely after a divorce or breakup is perfectly normal. But it doesn’t mean you have to go through it for long. One way to use your spare time while avoiding feeling lonely is by volunteering. Thankfully, there are plenty of charities you can engage in instead of brooding and thinking over an ex who isn’t coming back. In my opinion, getting your hands on a reliable After-Breakup Survival Guide and picking a few charity events you can volunteer in is a much more productive option. Volunteering will not only make you a much better person but will also help you cope especially if you have no friends around or are in fact living alone. Now that we have addressed 10 ways you can move on after a breakup that left you broken and lonely, here are three things that you aren’t supposed to do. I understand that avoiding these three is easier said than done. But if you manage, you’ll be well on your way towards becoming a strong, independent man/woman.
1. Whining about the past makes you feel lonely
After a breakup or divorce, accepting things as they come is very crucial. Most people fail to move on simply because they are still glued to the past. I know this can be a difficult phase in your life but once you overcome it, you’ll end up much stronger than you were. Therefore, it is imperative for you to start by accepting the situation and taking it one step at a time. Accepting that the relationship didn’t work out is what’ll kick start your healing process. Take it a day at a time and you’ll start seeing the positive changes in due course. Needless to say, there are a lot of things that’ll make you feel like constantly whining about the past. If this ever happens to you, feel free to pick up any good After Breakup Survival Guide on how to move on and remind yourself of the reasons not to. The guide will also give you a lot of tips on how to move on without whining. And if you ever find yourself whining to your friends or folks – if you have no friends – then you need to stop whatever you are doing immediately. First of all, take care of your lonely situation because it has a way of dredging up these unwanted feelings when you are supposed to be moving on. And whining will only make things worse. Once you’ve successfully stopped whining, your next step should be making new memories. And you can do so by either traveling or learning a new skill. Heck, you can even decide going shopping so as start feeling good about yourself again. Keeping your mind busy will most certainly make the memory of your ex, and everything about him or her, fade. And that is exactly what you need in order to move on successfully.
2. Reaching out to your ex after the breakup when lonely
Your chances of running back to your ex because you are lonely are very high especially when still fresh from the breakup. But doing so will not only exacerbate the situation but also make you look clingy. Clinginess is a very unattractive quality that has the ability to strip you off of your dignity in a matter of seconds. Chances are that your ex will want to hit you up are also high. That in mind, don’t you dare to give your ex the time of day even if you are living alone. Exes always test waters for whatever twisted motives they have conjured up in their heads. The first step you’ll need to take is deleting or blocking his or her phone number unless you have children or have joint properties after the divorce. You’ll also need to delete the ex from all your social media platforms. Getting rid of some of the mutual friends will go a long way in doing you some good. If they can’t live with that, then they aren’t really your true friends. They need to understand what you are going through without any judgment. Besides, you can add them back once you have fully healed. But until then, you will be required to keep off your ex and any links you have with him, that includes mutual friends. If possible, replace your old number with a new one and only distribute it to people who matter. That’ll include your family members, close friends, and selected colleagues. Again, getting your hands on a proper Survival Guide After a Breakup is crucial. It will give you some dimes on how to never running back to an ex and how to effectively cut them off. You also need to stop hanging out in places where bumping into your ex is highly likely. You need to be moving on. With that in mind, you can’t do that when you keep bumping into your ex on a regular basis. Always walk away from people who keep talking about your ex whenever you are around. Who knows, some of them might be the devil’s agents trying to gauge your reaction and report back to the ex.
3. Don’t entertain him even when you are lonely
Despite feeling a little lonely from time to time, entertaining your ex should completely be out of the question. And this is why you need to rethink your choice of living a life with no friends – if that’s the case with you. Being surrounded by friends, especially those with positive vibes, will always help you forget your ex. It’s normal for an ex to want to show up just to see if you are doing well without them or not. And if you aren’t over him or her, you might fall into the very abyss you’ve been trying to claw your way out of. Again, you need to consider having a few more positive friends in your circle. Once you are surrounded by positive people, the next step should be to cut the ex-lover off without any hesitation. He or she might start sliding into your DMs, WhatsApp, texts or inbox telling you how much he or she misses you. Don’t fall for that load of crap. If your ex-lover loved you like he or she claims, he or she would have fought much harder to keep you. For the umpteenth time, being lonely after a nasty breakup is very normal. But you shouldn’t use the lonely feeling as a pretext for entertaining an ex. Always remember the reason why the relationship didn’t work out in the first place. And with that in mind, no matter how sad or boring living alone after a divorce or breakup is, worry not. It will come to pass. You can also move past these negative feelings by thinking about all the benefits that come with being single. That way, you’ll never find yourself entertaining an ex or feeling lonely. Even if telling off your ex might be quite hard, always remember that keeping off is always for the best. And from there, you won’t find it difficult to do all in your power to protect your peace of mind.
Final word
Apart from reading the best Survival Guide on how to stay single and less lonely, you’ll need to understand and accept the fact that breakups do happen. Sometimes, a break up isn’t personal. Therefore, it’s always a brilliant idea to stop beating yourself up over a break up because that’s what opens the doors to loneliness. The best thing you can do is accept the outcome and move on to a much better, happier life. Remember to draw as many lessons from the breakup as you can so that you can do better in future. This is important because it’ll make your next relationship better, more productive and mature. You might also want to go out and make new friends especially if you have no friends. But remember to be extra careful when picking new friends because friends can either make you or break you. Making new friends with a positive perspective on life will help you learn the lessons and come out of the heartbreak much happier. Being lonely after a breakup will only make you think of your ex – which in turn stagnates your ability to move on. Also, make sure you’ve completely healed before regaining contact with your ex, that’s if you have no other choice but to do so. But the best option is and will always be cutting an ex off and moving on to better things and people. Understand that people come into our lives for different reasons and seasons. Chances are that your ex-lover was meant to be a valuable lesson and has done his or her part. For that matter, there is absolutely no reason for you to keep sticking around. Learn your lesson as fate intended and move on! Last but not least, always remember this; what doesn’t kill us is meant to make us stronger!