The Complicated Web of Love
Love is complicated. The same person with whom you had shared your marital vows or promised to be together till death could no longer be special to you. What is this supposed to mean? How can you fall out of love so easily? Does it make you wrong, inhuman, heartless and unfair? If you are battling with all these emotions then do read the article below to have you all sorted and guilt-free.
Man is a bundle of wants. To fall out of love is completely natural and human. What appealed to you sometime back may not appeal to you sometime later. This could be due your partner's sudden change of behavior, your own changed perspective or if someone better comes up in your life.
It is easy to leave a relationship. It saves your partner from being trapped in a loveless bond and gives you both opportunities to explore other relationships. But sometimes, it is hard to ascertain whether you and your husband are just going through a rough patch or whether you're falling out of love.
There are some definitive signs to determine whether your once cherished love is dwindling. But before we proceed to that, let us first read about why do we fall out of love.
The Meaning of Falling Out of Love?
The main reason for falling out of love is simply because we are all human beings. The Creator has designed us in such a way that we do fall out of love. This does not mean that there are no long-lasting love relationships. Relationships which last quite long or forever have either one or both the partners understand the meaning of true love. They might fall out of love but are quick to fall in love again and even deeper than before.
People generally fall out of love in the initial few years of their marriage. But if they plan to stick on, they get habituated to each other's company. Love is a tricky emotion. When you first fall in love with a person, your heart is clouded by a few positive qualities of that person but as time passes, the negative qualities start to surface and you don't feel in love anymore. The same person who you fell madly in love with may feel rather annoying later.
You can avoid such a phase in life by firstly, giving your courtship a lot of time before jumping into a marital commitment and secondly, giving your relationship some time before you call it quits.
People who feel that they no longer love their partners might be feeling so because of lack of sex, constant fights and no communication. But couples need to understand that falling out of love and falling in love back again is a cycle just like the tides of the ocean which come and go.
People feel that they are falling out of love because the way their heart stopped on seeing their partner, the same exhilarating feelings do not come any more. They start to see the flaws in their partner and decide to call it quits. People need to understand that the first round of falling in love is characterized by strong feelings of love, a desire to spend more time with each other and the butterflies. The second round is characterized with a more easy going comaraderie and some fights while the third is characterized by habitual dependence on each other. If, right in the beginning of a relationship, you are aware of these phases, you are less likely to fall out of love or end your relationship. In many healthy long-term relationships, love grows over a period of time.
But if you are in a stage of life when you are confused about your feelings for your husband or boyfriend, then the below mentioned signs will help you ascertain that you have fallen out of love. How to and whether to reignite it or not will be discussed in a later segment of this article.
8 Definitive Signs Which Mean You're Falling Out of Love
If you constantly feel that you are trapped with your partner then you need to read these 8 definitive signs which mean that you are falling out of love.
1. Their imperfections start to stand out
A deep and true love is when you start to like or accept your partner's imperfections too. While it is quite natural to get annoyed by some imperfections of your partner, if you feel you are constantly irritated by everything that your husband says or does, then probably you are growing out of love for him.
2. Diminishing Communications is the new meaning of falling out of love
A diminishing communication between both of you could be implying a deeper meaning. It could mean that you both are falling out of love with each other. Gone are the days when every trivial matter seemed important to be discussed with your husband. You are realizing that you are hiding more and more things from him not because you feel there is no need to tell him. This is the first indication of diminishing communication between spouses. At times, even when you have something to say, you feel that your partner does not listen actively and slowly you have reached a phase when you no longer feel like sharing anything with him. This is the first sign of danger in a healthy relationship and if not checked in time, either one of the partners will fall out of love.
3. You Start Observing Others
If you develop a wandering eye and start to find others more appealing than your partner, then you might be falling out of love for your partner. He or she is no longer attractive to you and you suddenly find others better than your spouse.
4. You’ve Fallen For Someone Else
If you have fallen in love with someone else other than your partner, then you better leave the relationship to save the pain for your partner.
Finding Out About Jen, Kelly, Sarah or Whatever Her Name Is… Do you remember that moment…. the moment your heart sank and it sent you into a crazy tailspin? The moment you realized there was….. SOMEONE ELSE….. Your whole life… all your plans… all your ideas…. came crashing to the ground in an instant. So painful. So devastating. So raw. Your mind starts racing… wondering…. who is she? What makes her better than you? What makes her so amazing? Oh wait….. WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME? WHY DOESN’T HE WANT ME? And you continue in shaming yourself for something that has absolutely nothing to do with you and how you look or your value in the world. Can you relate?? I can! I have been here. First it was Sarah… then it was Wendi…. then it was Randi…… And now I see this all the time with my clients! Everytime I hear someone tell me an “another girl” story…. I go right back to the moment I found out about Sarah, Wendi and Randi! The first step, is admitting that your relationship has a problem that you can’t fix. After admitting it, you then must go through the stages of grief. You can stay in grief for as long as you like…. Or you can choose to move forward with your life. Moving forward with your life will be the shift you need to take to start building self confidence and self love. Self confidence and self love are the two key ingredients to building the exact life you desire and attracting a healthy relationship into your life. I went from jumping into relationships with toxic people, trying to fix everything and then always being cheated on…. to slowly getting to know a lifelong friend, I can trust, who adores and loves me deeply. No trust issues, no bad surprises and no emotional roller coasters for me anymore! If you are ready to build self confidence and self love…. AND you are done wasting time on jerks. Apply for a free clarity call so we can talk about your story and I will provide you with the resources you need to move on QUICKLY! So you quit waisting your time attracting jerks and don't have to worry about dying alone. Cheating is the number one problem my clients face and overcome. My clients are confidently meeting and attracting great men they can connect with,
5. Your Future Together Appears Bleak
In a successful relationship, partners are always planning their future and excited about their plans ahead. If you start envisioning your future alone or with someone else, then probably you are falling out of love.
6. Sex Diminishes
Every relationship goes through sexual ebbs and flows and if you are suddenly facing lack of sex in your relationship, it could be just a phase. You need to determine whether you feel like having sex with others or do not feel like having sex at all. If the latter is true then probably it is just a phase but if you feel that you want to have sex with someone else then you have fallen out of love for your partner.
This could mean that the spark in your relationship has diminished and you should break up.
. 💔 We're so distant, tolerating each other politely. No-fault, but everybody walks their own path. 💔 . . . . . _______________________________________ ↘️CREDITS↙️ - Music video director: Gaetano Morbioli - Song lyric: Non è detto - Laura Pausini. _______________________________________ ➡️ All rights go to their respective owners. Credits to the owners. I do not own the pictures unless stated. ⬅️ _______________________________________ Thanks for ❣️ . #gaetanomorbioli #laurapausini #laurapausinilyrics #nowyouknow #nowyouknowquotes #quotes #quotestagram #quotestags #quotesofinstagram #quotestag #instaquotes #sadness #sadnessquotes #heartbreak #lovehurts #broken #hurt #brokenheart #heartbroken #sadquotes #brokenheartquotes #sadlove #heartache #hurtquotes #idontloveyou #idontloveyouanymore #youdontloveme #indifferent #indifference #deepquotes
7. Your Priorities Change
In a healthy and loving relationship, both the partners are a top priority for each other. They are willing to sacrifice their desires for their partners while making mutual decisions. But if suddenly, you do not feel like compromising on your wishes for your partner and refuse to bother if it could affect your relationship, then you are falling out of love.
8. You Don't Respect Your Partner Anymore
In healthy relationships, mutual respect for your partner is more crucial than love. If you have started feeling disdain for your spouse and do not feel like supporting or trusting him or her, then your relationship is pretty much over already.
Ways to Keep the Fire of Love Burning
If you want to avoid reaching such a phase in your life, then there is some effort which both of you have to give in order to make the relationship last long.
You need to practice gratitude and also spread a positive message. Do not focus on what you do not like about your partner, instead, praise them for their good qualities.
You need to open up your partner totally to keep the flames ignited. Both you and your partner should know each other in and out. Always be each other's first priority. Try to keep one day in every week only for each other.
Can the Fire be Re-Ignited?
It is possible to have your partner back in a relationship if you are going through a loveless phase. Both of you have to put in some efforts to reignite the flames of love. You can go out on dates alone or make some rules at home. You both need to talk it out, sort out your differences and come to mutual agreements.
In the worst cases, even when one partner has cheated on the other, couples have gotten back with each other. True love, understanding, forgiveness and respect for each other are necessary for reigniting the flames of love.
You have to understand that love is not obtained but has to be shared. The best way to feel love is to give it. It is quite possible to get your love back only if both of you are determined to do it together. You cannot do it alone.
Whatever said and done, while there are ways of bringing love back in a dead relationship, you are totally free to walk out of one if you feel it is not worth it. You cannot survive a loveless marriage even if you make compromises. You will end up making your life and other's miserable. The 8 definitive signs mentioned above should be analyzed deeply by you and should be given a lot of thought and time. If even after constant trying, you feel that you can no longer live with your partner, do not hesitate to cut the ties. You might make your partner unhappy for sometime, but eventually, they will figure out a way to be happy. You just need to ascertain whether it just a hormonal imbalance or a general low phase in life which is making you feel that way or you have genuinely fallen out of love with your partner.