The 8 Best Ways on how to find a girlfriend you want

Tips on how to find a girlfriend from different social setups

By Evelyn
The 8 Best Ways on how to find a girlfriend you want

Determine what kind of good traits you would like for a girlfriend

Is one of your New Year's resolution finding yourself a girlfriend? We're not talking about someone that you see casually or a friend with benefits, we're talking about someone with whom you can develop a long-term relationship. That's a good resolution, now it's time to think how you're going to find her.

We all have an ideal person with whom we thought we could fall in love. We have like a checklist of the qualities that that person has to have for us to consider having a relationship. Have you got one of those? Have you seriously thought about what traits you would like your girlfriend to have?

Don't fool yourself thinking you're going to find the perfect girlfriend (there's no such thing, we're not perfect), instead think about finding your ideal girlfriend. Looks are important but they fade and in the long term you'll need more. So if you don't have a clear idea of what traits you'd like your future girlfriend to have, here are some valuable traits that you should look for (you should probably strive for those yourself).

1. A girl who's comfortable in her own skin

Confidence is very sexy, right? There's something very alluring in a girl that knows who she is and is totally OK with it, it shows in the way she talks, she interacts with you and with others. She may not be a supermodel but her confidence really makes her stand out. A girl like that could be a little intimidating if you're not as confident but anyway you should go for it.

2. A girl who can stand as your equal

Smart is the new sexy. Look for a savvy and smart girl, someone who can carry a conversation beyond the weather and clothes and her favorite singer. 

3. A girl who's got honesty and integrity

Honesty is a building block for trust and that is crucial in a relationship, so look for a girl who's open and honest. Integrity is a very valuable trait too, there's got to be concordance between her words and her actions. It's such a turn off when someone says one thing and does another thing that's completely the opposite.

4. A girl who knows her own mind and respects yours

Avoid any girl with manipulative behavior, look for someone who will respect and value your interests separate from their own. A girl who can respect your personal boundaries while at the same time remains close to you physically and emotionally. A girl who's not going to try to change you. That kind of girl will value your mind as much as she values hers, and that's pivotal in a relationship.

5. A girl who can laugh and doesn't take herself so seriously

A sense of humor can be a lifesaver in any relationship, especially in a romantic one. Look for a girl who can laugh at herself and with you. A girl who can make jokes and also can take jokes. There's nothing better than to be able to laugh with someone close to you.

6. A girl who's got your back

Look for a girl who will support you in the good times but also during bad times. You'll need someone with a good shoulder you can fall on, who's strong enough to stand by you with your life choices.

Now that you know what traits to look for in a girlfriend, it's time to determine how you're going to find yourself a girlfriend. What you need to do and where you need to look and what you need to avoid. It's not easy but it's doable and if you find your ideal girlfriend, totally worth it.

Keep reading, we'll help you make your New Year's resolution come true. These are 8 best ways on how to find the girlfriend you want.

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How to break the ice and find a girl online

You may want to dip your toes on the online dating world, have you done that? While you were doing that did you had it clear that you wanted to find a girlfriend? Maybe not, but now that you know what you want, you may approach the online thing differently.

Meeting someone online has a disadvantage: you can't actually see her, you're just communicating via text messages and if breaking the ice with a girl in person is hard, here it becomes harder because you can't gauge her responses visually. So, what's the best way to break the ice with a girl you met online? We'll give you a couple of tips.

1. Start an actual conversation

This may seem a bit obvious but that's the thing with online dating, you either just browse through profiles and like the pretty faces, or you get by with just saying Hello! or Hey! That's not going to cut it, you are looking for a girlfriend right? For that to happen you need to get to know the girl, and the best and only way to do that is by having an actual conversation.

You may get lucky and find yourself a chatty girl, so kickstarting a conversation will be no problem at all, but if she's not cooperating and she seems interested then it falls on you to start things rolling. When we say conversation we mean that you find a topic in which you both are interested and talk about that, you'll see she will start to open up.

2. Show a keen sense of humor... be funny

Jokes are a sure way of breaking the ice, so if you think it can help start a conversation then throw her a joke. Just mind that it's nothing disrespectful or offensive to anyone. Be creative but don't force it, it has to flow with the conversation, otherwise, she'll think you're just goofing around and she won't take you seriously. 

Girls like funny guys, someone who can make them laugh, so if that is one of your qualities put it to good use here. smiley

How to break the ice on Facebook

You can find yourself a girlfriend on social media too. Has a girl caught your eye on Instagram or Facebook? It happens more than you know, lots of couples have found each other by starting conversations on some of their social media accounts. 

If browsing through Facebook you found an intriguing photo of a girl you would like to meet, how would you proceed there? How can you approach her and then break the ice without scaring her off? Take notice of the following advice so she can become your girlfriend instead of you becoming her FB stalker.

3. Keep a clean profile and consider your approach

Be sure that your FB profile is not weird, that can scare her off right away. Choose a normal pic of yourself where your face is clear and revise what you have written about yourself on the About page. Once you've done that, considered how you're going to approach her. The first thing you need to do is send her a friend request. If you've never met and have not connections... good luck, but if you have friends in common you can use that link to get her to accept your request. If she accepts you'll have conquered the first battle.

4. Start a conversation, if she responds positively ask her out appropriately

Now that you're friends you can start talking through FB messenger (don't talk to her through her timeline or in the comment part of the photos, that's a no-no). Since you're not acquainted with each other, you should introduce yourself with a few lines and if you have friends in common use that as the ice breaker, or check out her About page maybe you'll have something in common that you can talk about. Be honest, that almost always works.

After you've been messaging for some weeks you can gauge if she's interested or not, if she is, you can ask her out. Again don't be creepy about it, be clear and send her a message proposing a day and hour and that you meet in a public place. Be careful to phrase your invitation tastefully. Good luck! 

How to break the ice and find a girl as a gamer in a gaming platform

If you're a hardcore gamer finding yourself a girlfriend who's also a gamer is not going to be easy because she is doing the same thing as you: sitting at home playing a game all day. But don't despair, there are a couple of things you can do to break the ice and find a girlfriend in your turf.

5. Find online dating sites for gamers

Thanks to the modern gaming market you're now able to connect with friends and strangers all over the world in whatever they're playing. So the right dating app or site can help you find yourself a girlfriend, it will allow you to meet girls that share your same passion.

There's a niche of online dating sites that cater to gamers like you, so you should check them out. is a worldwide free dating site where you can post your interest, your favorite video games, consoles, etc in your profile and that's how the game matches you up.

Gamer dating was created specifically for the gaming community, adults looking for love. You get rewards for participating. Sound like a fun and interesting way to meet gamer girls.

If you're a gamer with lots of interest you should try GeekDating, this site is free and it'll help you find your geek soulmate.

6. Visit gaming conferences and conventions

Those conferences and conventions are going to be full of people that are also hardcore into gaming. Not every girl there is going to be interested in dating but you never know maybe you'll find your girlfriend there. It'll be easier to break the ice because you'll have lots of topics to talk about. 

You don't have to fly out to meet your gamer girlfriend, you can seek local gaming leagues or meetups near you, those can also work too. 

How to spot a scammer looking for "rich" boyfriends

We all want to avoid online scammers, especially the ones that pray on the matters of the heart. There are people (because sometimes they're not even girls) out there who love to pray on lonely guys, beware of those. How do you identify a scammer looking for money instead of love? 

This last two tips could help you identify and avoid online dating scammers who are looking for rich boyfriends. 

7. Pay special attention to her profile

Take a good look at her profile pic, if it's too good to be true, then probably it is. Save the photo and do a reverse Google search to find out if that photo's been used before. Check out what she says about herself, like if she's self-employed or she lives in another state or out of the country but she's not specific about the place. Or she says she's local but is never available when you ask for a meet.

8. During a conversation pay attention to what she says and how she says it

If you have your doubts, pay special attention to how she writes (spelling errors or grammatical mistakes) if there are too many, that's a red flag, especially if she has stated that she's lived her whole life in the States. Also, beware if she asks you to communicate outside the dating site or app, she's probably trying to get additional information about you that'll help her con you.

Trust your instincts, if something sounds or looks fishy, don't pursue her.


There's nothing set in stone when it comes to the best way to find a girlfriend. It comes down to how determined you are on your quest and what are you willing to do to finish it. We hope that the tips above helped you get a sense of how to proceed.

We're sure you'll find her. Good luck! 

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