Don't Text Your Ex! This Is Why

If you are trying to move on with your life, then never text your ex. If you want to forget your past relationships, then never text your ex.

By Amanda Palmer
Don't Text Your Ex! This Is Why

Leave the past behind

The relationship that you shared with your ex was one of the best things that happened to you. Your ex was your true soulmate in every sense, and it was with him that you felt your world completed. Especially if was your first love, it was due to him you felt for the first time what love is like and the amazing turmoils of emotions when one is in love.

No Matter What you say, you will never forget your first love!

This is a very deep statement made by someone who has obviously experienced love and life. When you fall in love for the first time, things are different - you are very raw in your emotions, and it is for these reasons that even if you move on in life later, you will always have a soft spot for your ex. You can never forget your first ex no matter how much you love your current boyfriend.

Sometimes, it may not be one of your first relationships, but you do break up due to some unpleasant circumstances. This creates a lot of havoc in your lives, and you openly start detesting your partner. You might want to text or message him just to make him jealous of your current happy life or just send him hateful messages. When you fall in love, you think it is forever. But due to certain circumstances, the relationship does not work out. Either you or your partner decide to call it quits and set each other free. You move on with life in search of someone better. Your breakup could be mutual, could be painful, could be forceful, could be one-sided, and also could be unaccepted by you. In such circumstances, it's very tough for you to forget their ex and move on in life. But once a relationship is over, you have to learn to move on in life. Texting your ex would land you in a heap of complications. Do NOT text your ex, and here's why:

You will cause problems in his current relationship

Continuously texting your ex under the guise of being 'just friends' can only lead to complications, heartbreak, and fights for many people. No one would like their current partner to be constantly being texted or disturbed by their ex. Not only does this make his current girlfriend insecure about their relationship, it also leads to fights and possible break up between them. If your boyfriend broke up with you against your wishes, then doing so would definitely give you satisfaction, but trust me: this satisfaction would be very temporary. If he has decided to leave you, then texting him repeatedly might only get him physically towards you, but his heart would be elsewhere. If he is yours, he will come back to you under any circumstances. Give him time to realize your importance, and if he still does not come back to you, then he was never yours.

Time is the best healer

If both you and your boyfriend have decided to break up mutually and move on with your lives, then you should never text him. Forgetting him might be tough, but if you constantly text your ex, then forgetting him is next to impossible. You can never win him back by doing so. Time is the best healer. It's possible that what you feel for your ex right now, you might not feel in a few months. You never know - someone better might be just around the corner waiting for you. Give yourself some time to forget your ex and move on.

Never text your ex trying to gain sympathy

If you message your ex with your sob stories, then he might come back to you, but only out of sympathy. That will neither make you happy nor him. He might just come back to you due to a feeling of obligation, but not genuine love or longing for you. You do not want a relationship built on the foundation of sympathy.

Never text your ex due to false alarms or untruthful reasons

It's quite natural to feel jealous of your ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend. But if you feel that texting him giving false reasons will make him come running to you, leaving his girlfriend behind will only make him hate you. Next time, even if you need him for some genuine reason, he will ignore your text or message.

Never text your ex with abuse or harsh words

Doing so would create a bigger gap between both of you and create irreconcilable differences which even time would never heal. It's also best to stay good friends after a breakup so that you can approach your ex whenever you genuinely require it.

The person I hate the most in this world is myself , you know.

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Never text your ex asking him to accept you back

If you do so, you lose the real emotion and essence behind your apology. If you realize that you have made a mistake breaking up then you can always text him politely asking him to meet, instead of texts and messages. Nothing compares to a heart-to-heart conversation and an apology directly to the person concerned.

You should never message your ex describing your current relationship status

Doing that would only prove to him that you still care about him and want him to know everything that is going on in your life. If you are so happy and occupied in your life, you should have no time to message or even remember your ex. Texting him with your current boyfriend's pics might make him jealous too and cause trouble in your new relationship. If your ex was the possessive kind, then texting him showing how happy you are might lead him to hurt your current and innocent boyfriend. If it's over, let it be over.

Forget your past and move on

Texting your ex often will not let you forget your past or stay devoted to your current partner. You have to realize that no two individuals are the same in this world. If you text your ex repeatedly, then you might knowingly or unknowingly be comparing your current boyfriend to your ex all the time. That will never let you give complete justice to your current relationship, and you might end up screwing this one too.

It will just show that you are jealous

You might just want to teach your ex a lesson by texting him with all the lovely pics you and your current boyfriend have taken, but doing so will only show your weak side to him, and you might end up being a laughingstock in front of your ex. If you are so happy with your life, why do you need to prove it to him?

If it was a bad relationship, do not give him a moment of smug satisfaction

Texting your ex after a bad relationship and/or a bad breakup will soothe his ego and give him a moment of smug satisfaction thinking, 'She still needs me!' Obviously, you do not want to give him that impression. Hence, you should refrain from texting him no matter how much your hands twitch to send him a text. Show him that you are wonderful without him, and remember that if you ignore him completely, you will send a clearer message.

Never text your ex even if you miss him

When you miss a person, you tend to think of only the good times you shared with the person. During such times, it's necessary that you remember the reasons for the breakup, especially if it was a bad relationship and ended badly. Texting him might get him back to you, but perhaps you do not want to go through it all again. Let him approach you with a decent apology, and then maybe you can give it another chance, but practice certain discipline yourself!

Write your emotions, but do not send the text

If you feel the strong urge to text him, then just type it - type all that you have been wanting to say to him all this while: all your emotions, your tears, your loneliness. Just don't send the message. It will calm you down. Pouring your thoughts and emotions onto something maybe a phone or a paper helps a person get more sorted and calm. If you must write out your emotions, do so - just do not send it to him. This too will pass. Remember, time is the best healer. It will heal your loneliness, your missing him, and also your anger towards him. You might never get a person better than him in your life again, or you might get someone much better than him. If something is over against your wishes and even after trying repeatedly, then it was never meant to be. Texting and messaging your ex will just repel him further away from you - might jeopardize your current relationship and even his current relationship. It will only land you in an emotional mess.

Careful consideration for the future

Handle your breakup maturely, but if you feel it was your mistake and you still love him, then instead of texting him, try to meet him personally and speak your heart out. That will have a better impact on him and on your relationship. Remember the time when you broke up. What was the reason? Was it his fault or yours? If it was his fault, does he always behave like this? Did he behave badly under some pressure? You will be the best judge of the situation. While it's always fair to give someone another chance in life, you don't want unnecessary complications in life. Maybe you do care for this person, but you deserve someone who is more goal-oriented and focused in life. There is nothing wrong with taking a break. Perhaps after spending some time alone, you can analyze your relationship and decide whether you want him back in your life or not. Time will help you think clearly so you can make a mature decision. But texting him repeatedly in this phase will not let you experience the sound clarity of your mind. Also after a breakup, you are free to see other people. Go out often, see other people, and see how they think or behave. If you still long for the company of your ex, then maybe you should think about talking to him.