10 Top FAQs of Everything about Virginity Answered Here

Are you still a virgin after using a dildo? And other virginity questions

By Madiha A.
10 Top FAQs of Everything about Virginity Answered Here

The Representation of a Virgin

Virginity, in most cultures and religions, is considered more moral than the physical aspect of a person's life. The concept of virgin Mary connects this physical aspect to piousness and divinity. Virginity is rather an idea or an opinion than physical property, so it is bound to vary from person to person. Some believe that when a person gets sexually intimate with the other person of their choice it is when they lose their virginity. Others believe that whenever P into V sex occurs with or without consent a person loses their virginity, which makes all rape survivors non-virgin. A belief also says that when a women’s hymen breaks she loses her virginity either if it happens due to a tampon, physical activity or even masturbation, which is not true. 

An individual whether a male or a female is free to decide when they want to give up their virginity. It should be done freely and without any impairment or coercion. Nobody else is capable of taking or stealing your virginity, only you get to decide when to change it. It is important to understand that virginity is not a physical quality but a mental one, that we carry with ourselves.
 
There are many situations where sexual contact may have occurred but the person might be too drunk, pressured, or too young to decide to have sex or not. For someone who was abused or assaulted, they may think that they are not virgins anymore. This is not true because they haven’t chosen for that to happen to themselves yet. So it means you are still a virgin until you decide to have sex with someone else yourself. Nothing will change down there, and nobody can tell if you are a virgin or not until you choose to.

10 Top FAQs of Everything about Virginity

There are several myths and taboos associated with the concept of virginity. Virgin in one culture may not be virgin in the other and the concept about losing virginity may also differ. When talking about virginity, several questions remain unanswered due to shame, hesitation, and religious and social restraints. Listed below are the top 10 frequently asked questions about virginity for girls and guys.   

For Girls

Girls feel more hesitant asking questions related to their physical features. Most of the girls remain clueless about their own virginity throughout their lives. Here are some questions that a girl might think about asking but due to any reason could not ask. The answers to these questions will help get an idea about the state of virginity.  

1. Am I Still a Virgin If I Use a Tampon? 

Any girl who is having periods can freely use tampons. Tampons work equally well for non-virgins and for all those who haven’t had sex. Sometimes a tampon may lead to stretching or tearing of the hymen but it doesn’t take away your virginity at all. A broken hymen cannot take away your virginity. You will only lose your virginity when you decide to have sex.

2. Should I rush to have sex since everyone else is doing so?

It is your body, so it is your choice. Don’t let your friends or family pressurize you into having sex until you feel like it yourself. Sex shouldn’t be like scratching an itch and moving on, it is supposed to be meaningful. Your heart and mind will signal you about the right time and person. There are many more important things in life than sex. Trust us you are not missing out on anything if you are waiting for the right partner and time. Focus on your career, travel the world after all who wants to get their life tied around an unexpected pregnancy.

3. Will Bleed when I Lose Virginity?

It is a common misconception that you bleed when you lose your virginity. Losing virginity means when you have intercourse for the first time in your life. Some women might bleed after having sex for the first time and some won’t. The hymen is a thin tissue that covers the opening of the vagina. The bleeding occurs when hymen breaks after sex if it hasn’t been broken before. The hymen can break before having sex due to certain activities like horse riding or using a tampon. Having a broken hymen doesn’t mean that you have lost your virginity at all and it doesn’t always bleed when the hymen is torn.

4. Does a girl’s body change after she loses virginity?

Losing virginity changes a girl’s body at many levels. Firstly the elasticity of your vagina changes, it might take some time for it to accept the new activity you have introduced to your body. During and after sex your breast tissues swell up and the blood vessels dilate which leads to firmer breasts and this change may be temporary in some cases. You feel happy and relaxed because of the serotonin secretion in your body after having sex. Your periods might also get delayed.

5. Am I still a virgin if I use a dildo?

Virginity is a mental state. Using a dildo is masturbation, it basically gives you an idea of the feeling when you will inter-wine with an actual human being. Vaginal muscles are very stretchy, strong and active. They expand to hold something once it is there and go back to its original state once it is removed. The only change that a dildo can make to your hymen is that it is capable of breaking or tearing your hymen. An intact hymen is not a definition of virginity, the fact is that you can definitely masturbate and still be a virgin. 

For Guys

It is much easier for boys to get answers to their virginity related questions. Men are more open, expressive and inquisitive and hence get most of their questions answered through various sources. Although they may have questions different from girls when it comes to virginity but getting answers from various sources to help get a better picture.

6. Is it embarrassing to be a virgin? 

Being a male virgin can be tough, especially when people actually a-shame you for it and associate your masculinity with it. Virgin men fear being outed and as a result, they stay away from even approaching women. Sex becomes a mournful word in their lives instead of being enjoyable. Trust us there is nothing to be ashamed of being a virgin and waiting for the right time and girl. Let people talk, this is what they will always do. Do it only when you feel like doing it.

7. Does masturbation count as losing my virginity?

Nobody admits, but everybody does it. Girls do it, boys do it, singles do it, married people do it. Masturbating doesn’t make you a pervert; in fact it is a healthy and natural process. Losing your virginity means having penetrative sex with another person with consent. So nobody loses their virginity if they are masturbating.

8. Will I bleed if I have sex for the first time?

Yes, it is not only women who bleed but some men may also bleed while they are having their first time. Turns out, a percentage of men might have tight foreskin which may end up bleeding during intercourse. It doesn’t mean ounces and ounces of blood but just a slight show of red.

9. Does the male body changes after they lose their virginity?

Losing your virginity could be life-changing, let alone your body. The changes in men are more mental than physical. Having sex alters men’s brain structure. It improves their self-image and they are able to see themselves in a better light. After getting done with sex, your body will take some time to cool down and go back to normal. But other people won’t be able to tell if you are a virgin or not anymore unless you decide to tell them yourself. Nobody is comfortable for the first time, it will take some time for your brain and body to get used to the activity. Sex will improve your overall mood by releasing happy hormones in your body. It isn’t uncommon that most men climax faster than they have expected, it is completely normal and nothing to worry about. 

10. Is guy’s virginity a big thing than a girl?

Being a virgin for males is a curse or let’s say it is somewhat a derogatory term, but for women, it is a prize. There is a stigma towards men who haven’t done it yet. Having sex makes you a man and if a man is into one night stands they are a total stud. This means that if a guy sleeps with more women he will be celebrated by his friends but if a woman does the same she will be degraded and slut-shamed for it. So sadly being a virgin for men and being virgins for women are weighed differently. It shouldn’t be this way. A guy’s virginity should be treated in the same way as a woman’s because each person has a right and control over their body.

Related article: Is There Even Such Thing As A Sexual Afterglow?
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Summary

@theperfectgirlwhoisnt on Instagram

Virginity is the price you pay to have a physical relationship. It is an idea and a perception rather than a physical state. Where to some virginity is lost when you have wishful sex for the first time, for some others it is a mere transition from non-sex to sexual life. To know if you are a virgin or not ask yourself what is your definition of virginity and how your experiences sum up with your definition.
There is no way one can regain virginity, so it definitely is not an easy decision to make. So make sure you are losing it with someone who is actually worth it because once lost it won't get it back. 

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