Ways to "Train" Your Husband to Be Your Ideal Partner

Living with someone can be tough because every little flaw they have seemed to be magnified under the microscope when you are next to them all the time. You fall in love with the cherry on top only to find his flossing sound a little too loud. Behold that every wife at one point has found their husband insufferable and annoying. You are not alone in this. It's normal to get upset at your husband and want to "train" him.

For better and for worse, while your husband isn't a dog that can be "train" easily. There are ways and methods you can adopt to change his annoying little habits. Understand that this is a two-way street, while you are trying hard to change him, so he can live exactly the way you want him to, you should also reflect on yourself and see if there's anything you should change about yourself as well.

To key to controlling someone without having them feel controlled is to not be so dominant. Stop pointing him to go the direction you want him to. Don't tell him he is wrong upfront every time. If you exert dominance on your husband, he is fighting back. No one likes being controlled to a point where they feel they can't be themselves anymore.

He should still have his freedom and can make his free choices, just that his choices happen to coincide with what you want. Suggest to him what options would be better and persuade him to take your path with proper reasoning.

If you want someone to listen to you, don't throw him the "I-am-the-boss" attitude. How you phrase your concerns can affect how this conversation goes a lot. If you go around and act like you are a boss, your husband will feel inferior to you in the household and he will not surrender because he loves you, but because he is scared of you.

Eventually, he won't respect you because he feels you are taking control by force. Communication really is the key and you would want your husband to feel respected instead of just a puppet to make you happy. 

The key to getting someone to listen to you is not to make them feel less or inferior but to let them feel special and irreplaceable. They will appreciate the love and attention you give them and will respect you and learn to do things your way.

If you make someone stay and be obedient by making them feel they need you, that's a dependent relationship and is highly unhealthy. Instead, if you make someone feel they are special and can't be replaced, they'd gladly stick around you and want to please you because of the love you have given to them. They are so filled with ego and happiness that they will feel the desire to be close to you and please you

Too many couples lose the motivation to dress up and maintain their looks after marriage as they have lost the desire to visually please their partner. Now, you should always try to look hot even after being married for 30 years. Making yourself hot keeps the marriage alive and you are still stunning your partner with the effort you put in for him.

Dressing up isn't a shallow thing as many would think. It shows that you make an effort for your partner just like the first day you met. By showing him your appreciation for him, he will become more obedient as he wants to please you as well. The effort is always a two-way street. You can't ask your husband to listen to you fully if you aren't willing to work something for him.

Learn to be satisfied. Don't get the person that is always asking for more from the husband but refuses to give anything at all. Be appreciative of the effort he is making and make him happy to put more effort into it. He will stop trying to please someone that's impossible to please if you never show signs of appreciation.

Pleasing someone is a lot of work, and not a work one would take without any rewards, at least verbally. When your husband listens to you and does things your way. Show him how grateful you are for his gesture. That way he will see that his effort is well-noted and will continue to do so.

Never showing signs of appreciation will only frustrate you more because then you will see your husband stop trying and no matter what you do he just won't listen to you anymore.

Never undermine him in front of others. Let him feel big and in charge. Feeding him that ego and makes him feel in charge in front of others will make him more obedient to him. If you undermine him by publicly telling him what he does wrong, he is going to feel disrespected and will plot back.

Always find the good qualities to talk about when you are with his friends. Don't bash him when he is with others. Let him have some face and he will let you have yours at home. Be diplomatic in a sense that if he does wrong, try to convey it by smiling and suggesting maybe there's another way to do it.

If he doesn't comply, don't blow up immediately. Let him have his way and tell him how you feel back home. Making a scene on the spot is only going to damage your reputation and his, and make your relationship a gossip for others. No one wins from this.

Sex isn't a weapon to be used against your husband but it's a very good way to keep your husband's attention and affection. At the end of the day, people put an effort for people they love and care about. Keeping sex interesting and fun is a great way to make your husband want you just as the day he met you and he is going to put in the effort to keep you around, thus giving in to your demands and listening to you.

Think of innovative ways to fire up the sex life. Don't let sex be boring and a routine. Sex has always been a major element in a marriage and it's one of the biggest factors to a successful marriage. An excellent sex life often leads to the husband being more obedient to the wife. The positive influence goes hand in hand.

Does reading a book on training your husband help? A lot of the times these self-help books are full of exaggerated ideas that endorse immoral and unhealthy behaviors in controlling your partner. It's all for the gimmick. Choosing the right self-help book is really important. Choosing the wrong one is only going to instill wrong concepts in you.

In one famous instance, the book "How to Train Your Husband: A Vet Tech’s Guide to Love and Marriage" teaches you how to treat your husband like a dog. After all, as emphasized before, marriage is a two-way street, you should never expect your husband to just listen to you without you having to put in any effort. Treating your husband like a dog and expect him to do just that is hilarious. Always treat your husband like a person because he can communicate with you verbally and expresses his thoughts clearly.

Another one is "The Contented Little Husband" where it just complains about a husband non-stop and comparing him to a newborn to be just as exhausting and baffling. There's not much useful information involved but just despise for the men.

A lot of the times these books can be dangerous or toxic because it doesn't teach you how to be with your husband, it teaches you to complain or treat your husband like an animal. None of that can be healthy for your marriage and will effectively end it because you apparently have no idea how to be with another human being.

There are better ways to learn, especially from real-life experience. That's why forums often help because there are women sharing stories of how they handled their situations that resonate with you.

Your husband is a man, don't treat him any less. In the end, there has to be respect and communication. This is mutual. These are the methods you can adopt to "train" your husband but remember he shouldn't be the only one putting in an effort. You have to as well.