How Much Difference Does Sex Make In A Marriage?
The only thing you share specifically with your husband and with no one else is sex. That's why sexual intimacy is the only thing that differentiates your partner from just being roommates. It is a vital part of marriage.
Not only does it differentiate them in that way, but it also demands a very deep level of communication that you don't generally have in any other type of relationship. The sexual relationship requires that you talk with your spouse about very intimate and sentimental aspects. For example, to have an experience of true intimacy with your husband, you have to tell him where you like to be caressed, and make the necessary suggestions.
Therefore, it is essential that they feel comfortable with each other, with a trust that they have never felt before with anyone else. It requires that they speak with an open heart to know what each one wants to give and receive sexually. It is important that you reach a level of deep confidence that your partner will respond to your requests without judging you.
How Often Do Married Couples Usually Have Sex?
It usually happens: you get married and you stop making love with your partner and experimenting with sex. It is when, sometimes, infidelities or breakups arise. However, there are many marriages that do not want to break up but feel that they are not making the cut in the sexual field. They don't know if they do it a lot, a little, or not at all. How much is "normal"? How often do established couples have sex?
Or it can happen the other way around: people who think they do it a lot. As sex is still a taboo subject, unfortunately, people express themselves through forums and social networks, where they can remain anonymous.
On this occasion, a woman has opened a thread on 'Reddit' to consult with users just this: the frequency with which they, the married ones, have sex."My husband and I have been married for three years, and I have not really noticed any decrease in our sex life, despite the fact that people always joke or warn us that marriage ends with sex. However, I would like to know how long Have you been married and how often do you have relationships, "she asks. Next, she adds that since her husband is a military man, they do it only when he is at home, which is six to ten times a week. "I was wondering how much of our libido is due to him being out periodically and if we do it like rabbits or not," she adds.
We collect some of the answers:
"Three a week"
"At least once on weekends and about twice during the week, on average. It really depends on how tired we are when we get home. Some weeks we have nothing," says one user, who has been married for eight years.
"I am 27 years old and my wife 31, and we have three children. Our tenth anniversary is next month. We do it every day. Not some nights but we go, almost all of them. Once she was angry and we did not do it for almost two weeks. I had a bad time, "says another.
"Four times a week"
"No children, married for five years. We have sex about four times a week. We have been together, in total, eight years."
"Two times a month"
"Married for a year. Twice a month."
"Three or four times a week"
"Six years married, two children and a third on the way. Real sex: three or four times a week when not pregnant. During pregnancy (like now), once or twice a week."
What Should I Do If Sex Doesn’t Please My Husband Anymore?
Have your partners' feelings towards you changed radically? Don't they feel the need to have sex anymore? You may not be sexually compatible with your partner anymore. In some cases, the timing of sex may not be as pleasant as it was at first. This will lead to frustration and a bit of anger. What could you do in this situation? Take note:
Understanding that the path to finding pleasure in women is not always the same as that of men, having a communicative and worked relationship is essential to reach an agreement. "The caresses have the same importance of intercourse, they are not preliminary. There are multiple options to enjoy our sexuality: massages, glances, kisses ...", says Encinas.
If your partner is tired of certain practices in bed, or you are the one who does not feel comfortable with some behavior, it is very important to communicate it and make an effort to understand it. If we are not willing to cultivate our relationship and make that extra effort, perhaps the relationship we are in is not worth it. That misunderstanding and lack of agreement turn into frustration are lethal for a relationship, because we cannot live with a person who makes us feel incomplete and unhappy.
What Are The Different Ways To Spice Up The Married Life Aside From Sex?
Here are 10 marriage tips that can help you and your spouse enjoy marital happiness:
- Don't be a martyr. Learn to communicate your needs. For example: "I'm about to pass out, could you put the children to sleep tonight?"
- If you complain all the time, your spouse will stop paying attention to you and then try to avoid you.
- Encourage your partner with sincere compliments; never, never criticize him, just use positive words.
- Be cheerful and have a good sense of humor. Learn to laugh together and enjoy time as a couple.
- Decide how to handle household bills. Be practical and willing to discuss finances openly and freely without hiding anything. Commit to paying off all your debts and learning to live up to your income.
- Don't hold a grudge. Be the first to say you're sorry, even when your pride is hard to swallow. Make an effort to smooth over the situation. Put your marriage and your spouse's feelings first.
- Make a love letter to your partner every now and then, for no particular reason.
- Love your spouse completely. Maybe your wife has gray hair and some wrinkles, or your husband is bald and a little overweight. Learn to value your partner for who they are and stay true to their commitment to marriage.
- Show your children that your marriage comes before them: When your children notice your devotion and respect for one another, your children's sense of security will increase.
- Go out alone together once a week.
How Do I Get To Know My Husband Even Better?
Are there days when you think you don't know the person next to you well enough, even though you have e been married for years? Knowing each other well is essential for a couple to last and to be able to accept the strengths and weaknesses of the loved one.
Dialogue is one of the maximum keys for a relationship to work since it generates trust, closeness, and interest in the other. But don't ask a thousand questions to get to know him better because this generates anything but trust. On the contrary, it can cause distrust. Reinforce the communication of the couple with an exchange of opinions on a topic or on past experiences. It is important that during the conversation you respect the speaking and waiting times, letting the other choose the moment to touch on one topic or another so that they will not feel forced. Observation will also help you get to know your partner better since sometimes words don't say everything and it is actions and non-verbal language that will tell you the most to keep in mind. The facts of your partner will be the ones that guide you to see if he is really the person you like to be a stable couple.
How Do I Keep My Marriage Strong?
Establishing an effective way to communicate your wants, needs, likes, and dislikes without being aggressive or mean is essential to growing old with someone in complete happiness and harmony. To build the deepest bond with the person you love, you must keep something fundamental in mind: good communication.
You may be one of the people who say what they think, but you must understand that not all people are like that, and you must respect how each one is. There are those who feel uncomfortable when they have to talk about how they feel. But at some point, you will have to speak your mind assertively and empathetically if you want to make the most of your love relationship.
Communication is necessary for the life you share with another person to be successful. Not only at the couple level, if not at the family level and with any other type of relationship, but communication is also always essential. The same applies to your partner; you want your spouse to grow and evolve just like you want to. In a relationship, it is necessary that you grow as a person and that at no time you get stuck. The fastest way to distance yourself is to stop sharing and communicating with each other, and unfortunately, routines and lack of communication cause a couple to become emotionally distant.
Couples meet, they are attractive, they go out, they fall in love and as a natural conclusion, they get married. Making this decision, however, is not the end of a road, but one more step in the history of the couple. Marriage in itself does not solve anything, it is not the proof of intense love in the couple nor does it assure that two people will be together (or happy) for the rest of their lives.