Countless people around the world get their heart broken every day, when something they deemed to be true love, goes south. You may have experienced a number of relationships which you thought would never end, thinking ‘this is the one!’ for all of them – but even they ended in a few months.
If you’ve previously confused a past relationship with everlasting love, which ended soon after, you may be baffled by many questions around true love. Why is it so hard to find? What does it actually mean? In this article, you’ll learn all about it. So, keep reading!
What is love?
Essentially, true love identifies with an unshakable, unparalleled and unwavering devotion and fondness towards your partner. It associates an incredibly deep physical and emotional connection with them, to the point where thinking of a life without them is unimaginable.
What are the different kinds of love?
Love might just be a four-letter word, but it encompasses an ocean of emotions, feelings, and classifications within it. It’s a complex concept which can’t be seen or touched. It can only be felt – that too, by a small, lucky group of people who experience the ecstasy of falling in love.
The ancient Greeks were highly fascinated by the idea of love, just as we are, and have studied it in significant depth. They classified them into eight different types, but let’s discuss the three major ones here. Taking a look at these may help you define your relationships better.
1. Agape — Unconditional Love
In Agape love, the person experiences complete selflessness when it comes to fulfilling their partner with happiness and pleasure. It’s perfectly unconditional, demanding nothing in return, but only to please the other person. It was thought to be quite radical by the ancient Greeks, as only a few people seem to be able to sustain such feelings in the long-term.
2. Eros — Romanic Love
Eros is a purely ‘romantic’ type of love, representing feelings of passionate fondness between two mates. It’s an expression of strong romantic and sexual passion, and the physical desires that stem from it.
Intriguingly, the Greeks were quite intimidated by this form of love. They perceived it to associate a potential loss of control, due to the human instinct of procreation. They considered ‘Eros’ love to be powerful enough to transcend logical behavior, causing humans to be driven by nothing but passion and their desire.
In modern day, this is the type of love that’s considered to ‘burn hot and bright, but burn out quick’ because of its sexual and passionate nature.
3. Philia — Affectionate Love
Philia entails emotions of affection and care for the recipient of this kind of love. You could not only feel this for your partner, but also your family and close friends.
Strangely, Philia was considered to be better than Eros as a form of love, as it better represents unconditional fondness, even when it’s not fueled by extreme sexual desire.
Philia is what we call ‘platonic love’ today, which is derived from Plato’s arguments about physical attraction being unnecessary for true love to exist. Platonic love, is hence, a love without sexual acts or physical intimacy.
How can we describe love?
When you actually find true love, it’s gonna be like nothing you’ve ever felt before. True love occurs between soul mates who were always destined to be together. It comes out of nowhere when it’s the right time. It may look all types of wrong at first, but smashes all of your ideas about what love is supposed to be. You’ve never felt this way before, and that’s a pretty accurate description of true love.
Things may even seem too good to be true, because you’ve never been so lucky to suddenly share such a precious bond with someone that came out of nowhere. You keep telling yourself that there’s a catch to it, but things just never go wrong when you’re experiencing true love with your soulmate.
The connection of love can’t simply be defined, as it knocks you off your entire game plan as soon as you feel it. You two seem to fit incredibly well, with tons of things in common, with a perfect mix of some opposite elements in your personalities. The attraction is stronger than you’ve ever had for someone, and everything seems just right. There’s no pressure, and going with the flow just keeps making things more beautiful – that’s love.
In true love, both parties are accepted exactly for who they are. It may terrify you in the beginning, but that just stems from the traumatic experiences you might have had in the past around with relationships. You find an all-new belief in love, and suddenly feel its importance in every aspect of your life.
You may have never imagined your love life to look like this in the past, ever, but it’s suddenly your reality once you find your soulmate. It tells you that love doesn’t have to fit into the mold of the media, shows, books, or movies – it’s a feeling only you know, but can’t describe.
You keep being amazed at all the incredible qualities of your partner, with a positive lens that even sees the best in yourself! Everyone deserves this type of love, and hopefully will find it one day.
How do you tell people you love them?
If your situation matches the sketch we’ve drawn above, you’re most probably in love. Once you recognize this with surety, that you’ve genuinely fallen in love with a person, the next step is to communicate it.
It’s not a persuasion, it’s news
When you already know that you love someone, saying it should feel like a statement, and not a discussion or debate. Saying ‘I love you’ should ideally be approached as reporting a fact to the person you love, without worrying about what they’d think, or how they’ll respond.
The outcome of you saying ‘I love you’ is irrelevant, because it’s totally out of your control. All you can do is to communicate how you feel about your partner with utmost sincerity. It’s an expression of your emotions, and not the beginning of a negotiation.
There’s no need to be anxious about it, even though that’s easier said than done. Take a deep breath, and focus on sharing the news without anticipating a specific response. Remember, you’re not trying to persuade anyone with this statement, but your only objective is to let the other person know how you feel about them, and how certain you are about it.
There’s no need to beat around the bush
Sure, the three magical words aren’t light in any way. They hold immense importance for both, the deliverer, and the recipient. However, when you mean those three words with every atom of your heart, that’s the perfect time to say it out loud. There’s absolutely no need to be anxious, embarrassed, or ashamed about having to say it – it’s something you should be proud of, regardless of the outcome.
Telling the truth is powerful, but definitely requires courage. Remember that it’s not a crime to love someone, and communicating it once you feel it is the logical next step. There’s no need to beat around the bush, and don’t wait for months looking for queues or signs. As soon as you know that you mean it, say it with confidence.
What are other words for love?
Now that you know what love truly means, let’s look at some of the other common words for it. Even though they may not be perfect synonyms, they’ll represent some fragment of the immense mountain of love.
What are other emotions related to love?
Love itself is more of an experience than an emotion. It takes you on an unparalleled journey that’s shared with the one person you care about the most in the entire world – your partner! Here are some of the emotions you feel through love;
- Shared happiness
- Unconditional kindness
- Mutual attraction
Unfortunately, pop-culture has been shoving a deceiving image of ‘true love’ into the minds of the masses for years. Many people have been devastated by it, building unrealistic expectations about what true love genuinely means. If you’re looking to seriously fall in love, allowing yourself to receive that love in return, you need to start with understanding what it is. In this article, we’ve described all you need to know about the meaning of true love, its major kinds, and the emotions that come with it.