The definition of Bad Parenting
Bad parenting is not a single negative act but a series of actions that can harm little one’s psychology and behavior.
Parenting is the hardest task to do as a parent. Many parents opt to use their upbringing or their childhood experience as a blueprint to deliver good parenting to their children. This way isn't recommended at all since society is evolving with time. Therefore, the parenting you opt to come up with or adopt may affect your child behavior and behavior. When it comes to bad parenting some parents are fully aware of the consequences for their actions and some don’t care at all. Bad parenting can emanate from lack of drive to learn the right way to parent your child, or not knowing enough ways to be a better parent and role model to your child.
Achieving a good and consistent parenting style is the hardest thing to every parent, but avoiding certain practices that have proven to impact parenting negatively will add bonus to being a better parent. It is usually advisable to find a better parenting style since reconciliation after bad parenting rarely yields good results.
Effects of Bad Parenting on Children
The fact is that perfect parenting doesn’t exist, but one must be very careful since some behaviors or actions may cause a serious negative effect on your child. So without further ado let have a look at the negative effects caused by bad parenting.
1. Exposes your child to psychological disorder risks
According to the research study published in the journal "Child Development” states that “most of the children brought up in families dealing with abuse is likely to suffer from a psychological disorder." Also, direct abuse where a childhood abuse themselves within the household will highly expose them to post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This is according to a study published in the journal "Child Abuse and Neglect.” So it is better as a parent to avoid creating room for abuse within your home.
According to the study report for the research done by the University of Minnesota at kindergartens, they discovered that "explosive" kindergarteners are due to a rough relationship with their mothers during their early childhood stage. Escalating conflicts arise when mothers treat their children harshly and this leads to higher levels of hunger within their children.
3. Cause Low Self Esteem and Depression
For better performance of your child, it is better to boost his self-esteem which in turn causes a boost in self-motivation thus avoiding depression. Too much control of a child by a parent may make them vulnerable to depression and lack of confidence. Parenting style has a direct effect on a child's self-esteem. This effect is further explained in the study published in "Journal of Adolescent Research”
4. Poor Performance at School
According to the study published in the journal “Child Abuse and Neglect," it states that bad parenting can have a dramatic negative impact on a child's performance at school. The study defined that early neglect is harmful just as child abuse since it will prevent them from forming social relations at school. Neglect also will affect the rate at which they study and understand as compared to their peers. The other factor is frequently moving from place to place will affect your child's mental growth and adaptability which in turn will affect your child performance.
5. Poor Social Adjustment
This effect is proven by a research study published in “American Journal of Orthopsychiatry." It stated that boy who brought up with parents exhibiting violent behavior will have a problem adjusting to the school setting and socializing. The children will become the victims the victims of the abuse and violence thus making you terrible parent.
6. The child will start having Problem with Law
Parental substance abuse will create children with a tendency towards problems making behaviors and not doing well with law. Also, it is proven that mothers with juvenile delinquents will are far likely to give birth to children with the same problem. This is according to the research study published in the journal “Behavioral Sciences & the Law.”
Signs of Bad Parenting and Examples
Most of the parents have no clue on what signs shows if their parenting style is appropriate or not. Today you are going to learn Signs of Bad Parenting with examples. So here are some of the actions that define bad parenting styles.
1. Punishing your Child in Front of Everyone
This technique might make your child fear you but it kills his or her self-esteem when he goes out to meet with his or her friend who saw what you did. It might even encourage bullying of your child since your child will be afraid to approach you regarding what transpired while spending time with his/her friends. So don’t scold your child in public.
Example: Scolding your child in front of family, relatives, his friends, public and neighbors.
2. Reprimanding your Child even if he Spoke the Truth
Most parents usually punish their children when they tell the truth about the mistake they made. The first thing you should consider how courageous he chose to be in order to tell you the truth. Don’t be savage to your child by trying to punish the mistake. Reprimanding your child at this type of situation makes your child “bigheaded” and liar.
Example: your child makes a mistake you ask who did this or what happened here and she chooses to tell the truth despite having a lie that she can tell. On your side you get furious and you punish her because no mistake goes unpunished. Remember this makes you an enemy when it comes to speaking the truth.
Note: Child needs to see your loyalty and consideration when he or she speaks out freely.
3. Neglecting Your Child
Neglecting your child emotionally or physically will affect your child negatively. Some parents ignore their children needs without knowing that it will affect them negatively. When you ignore your child's needs makes him or she feel worthless, isolated and kills his/her self-esteem. This is leaving them unsupervised during their dangerous situations and thus they can choose to do bad things with aim of serving their needs.
Example: Failure to deliver what your child keeps asking you to buy for him, failure to deal with your child problems e.g. bullying at school by not making time to address them.
Note: A child needs to feel loved and cherished.
4. Setting Bad Example
There are parents who choose to turn a blind eye their child’s bad behaviors by tolerating it. Tolerating bad manners in your kid is bad parenting, it is not giving them freedom or letting them learn from their mistakes. Also, parents using vulgarities or swear words in front of your child shows how carefree you are, but that is not good parenting. Can you imagine if your child picks up the language and use it in school, or even at you and other family members? Other behavioral issues stem from drug abuse, getting into fights and others.
Example: Coming home drunk like frequently makes your child feel like drinking too or smoking, drug abuse and other unhealthy things you do is fine. If you are a single parent who keeps bringing different people to your house (“dating or sleeping with”), your child might feel that that is nothing of concern.
Note: Try to develop respectful habits that will affect your child positively no matter the condition you are in.
5. Embracing Favoritism in your Home
One of the thing that destroys your child quickly than abuse is partiality and this will be hard for your child to recover from it. A times parents clearly show or portray that they do care for one particular child due to a specific reason. If you express affection to one child, then you have definitely stubbed other one’s heart. This will create invisible hatred between children themselves and before you know it will be late to heal the wound created.
Example: Being quick to come into the attention of one child when anything happens, for instance, she needs a new pair of pants. You chose to dismiss one child bid claiming "no money" but when the other favored son or daughter comes you don't even hesitate to get into the emergency saving funds just to make her/him happy. It doesn't only come when it is time to provide, also through compliments.
Note: The fact is it doesn’t matter whether you are the chosen one favoritism destroys all siblings up to a point where they can all hate you just for it.
Bad Parenting vs Good Parenting
Bad parenting hinders a child's ability to grow, develop to their full ability and is a potential obstruction to their future path in life. It gives a different outlook to our child, on how best they could have achieved so much more when they had the guidance and opportunity of good parenting methods.
A child is a clean slate and everything they picked up from is always from an influence. The influence medium could be a parent, relatives, television media, teachers or even schoolmates. It is our duty as parents to guide them into making better decisions for themselves by setting a good example. Above are some pointers which we should bear in mind to avoid bad parenting.
Bad parenting is actually something you would want to work on and improve from. If you review your parenting methods and find that there are ways to improve on and you have no idea on how to, find help. Various forums, mother groups, self-help books, or therapy session could guide you along. Parenting is hard work. Children require strength and resilience so it is our duty to be sure to give it to them positively. Let's all raise happy and loving kids!