Long term relationships are amazing and when done right, can be filled with lots of beautiful emotions and memories with your partner. However, there are truths and other aspects to long term relationships. Hardships, trust, love and more all come with being in a relationship long term. There are many truths when being with someone for the long haul, some are very beautiful while others are not so easy. So read on to find out more!
Common Problems in a Long Term Relationship
1. Low Confidence
Some people can go through life not being entirely confident about themselves, and manage to remain positive people. However, for others especially in relationships, this can cause a harmful level of toxicity for their partners. Low self-esteem can cause rifts especially since it typically shows in the form of jealousy and insecurity.
2. Things May Get Boring
As we all know when starting a new relationship the honeymoon phase feels like heaven. Your new relationship is exciting and you are over the moon with excitement about your new partner. For months it seems like you can’t complete your daily routines without your new partner in the mix, somewhere. However, after some time passes things may fizzle down and depend on the situation you may feel completely different. Of course, this is not to say you are no longer into your partner but things won’t always feel the same. Sometimes, this alone can affect a relationship on a great deal.
3. You Might Find Yourself Attracted to Someone Else
It happens and it’s okay. It’s completely natural and doesn’t mean the end of the world for you or your partner. Sometimes, there is an underlying cause as to why people in relationships look elsewhere. It could be anything from needing more hobbies in your life to an intense need to spice things up in your own relationship with your partner.
Either way, these are things that can be fixed and as the saying goes the grass is not always greener on the other side! Just because you feel this way it’s not worth looking elsewhere but instead fixing what may need to be improved with your partner.
Goals of a Long Term Relationship
4. Maintain Your Identity
While it’s lovely and quite amazing being in a long-term relationship, it’s also all too easy to lose ourselves. Sometimes we can become so consumed with our relationships and partners that we lose touch with who we are and what we want. It’s important to always spend time with yourself and your hobbies as this too can help keep your relationship in a good and happy space.
5. Show How Much You Care
Doing nice things for your partner and show appreciation is a key ingredient to a great long term relationship. Because let’s face it, one truth is losing your partner can be very easy if you aren’t putting effort into your relationship. No matter if you do something as big as buying them something they like or as small as a special dinner night, it all adds up to show them you appreciate them for who they are and for being in your life.
Set Aside Time for Date Nights
Life gets hectic and can become quite difficult to make time for your significant other. However, making space to spend quality time with them will always help to bring you closer together. The goal is to move forward, grow, and fight problems together as one. Although life can be full of stresses and downers, hanging out with your significant other can help to relieve that stress while bringing out the best in you both. It also serves as a lovely reminder as to why you chose one another in the first place.
6. Build Trust and Keep It
Trust truly is the foundation for every relationship, especially those that are long-term. Without it, partners can lose interest in one another and the relationship can become very broken. The idea is to build trust and keep it going strong. Perhaps the most valuable characteristic within a relationship, trust can take two people a lot further with one another than not having any at all.
Without trust an unhealthy and dishonest relationship is inevitable. It’s always better to remain honest and consider your partner's emotions as a loving, trustworthy, healthy and happy relationship is what they deserve.
Break up in a Long Term Relationship
7. No one Wants to Make an Effort Anymore
The effort has to come from both ends in order for a relationship to be well-balanced. However, things will fall apart if there simply is not any effort being put out on either side. Effort can be shown in the smallest of ways, to the biggest of ways. Watching a movie, going to eat or just hanging out after work in some ways of putting effort to spend time together. Not trying for such things can only cause your relationship to crumble.
8. You’re not in it For The Right Reasons
Everyone has their own reasoning and logic for being in a relationship but if you’re not happy and fulfilled with your partner, you may need to rethink some things. Some decide to stay for the sake of having someone despite the relationship not being healthy. Other times it could boil down to societal pressures and what close friends and family think. Either way, if you’re not happy it’s time to rethink the well being and state of your relationship. Your happiness and self-care is always the top priority, no matter the situation.
9. You Give up Too Much for Them
Growth is vital for a fulfilling and happy life. We all need time to ourselves to focus on our personal well being as well as our future. If you find yourself putting goals, your social life, hobbies, and opportunities to the wayside for your relationship then it may be time to leave. You should never have to choose between your life or your partner, as relationships require an equal amount of care for your partners and your own personal life.
Ending a Long Term Relationship
Ending a relationship with someone you love is never something you plan for. It’s tough but sometimes things don’t turn out the way we hoped for. There are many reasons a relationship will not work out so it’s important to remain in tune with your emotions and who your partner is.
10. Be Honest with Yourself
When deciding to leave your long term relationship you must be honest about why you’re doing so. Often, we tell ourselves our partner’s hurtful behavior is on some level, acceptable. However, you must remain true to yourself and understand you deserve nothing short of happiness. You have to be honest in order to move forward in a better direction.
11. Be Prepared
No matter how we may feel in the moment, emotions will come pouring in. You will experience a plethora of various emotions but despite, it does not mean you made the wrong decision. Understanding breakups are not easy but its the first step and it’s important you remember your reasons why you decided to leave. No matter what you feel these emotions will pass as it’s all apart of the healing process.
12. Stick to Your Decision
No matter how tempted you are to sway in your decision, don’t. If you know your relationship is unhealthy and will only cause more drama, hurt or turmoil for your future it’s best that you stick to your guns. Keep your happiness in front of your mind and understand you are making the right decision. Although it is not easy, do not let your emotions get the best of you. It’s the only way to move on and ensure your happiness as it’s what is important.
13. Don’t Rush, Heal First Instead
Once a relationship has ended sometimes it’s tempting to jump into a new one especially if we are trying to quickly overcome feelings of hurt. This is not a good direction to go as it can only lead to more hurt and unresolved emotions. Instead, give yourself time to heal. It’s important to process what has happened and get past your ex in a healthier and safer manner. Occupy your time with new hobbies, activities, and social time for yourself with family or friends. All these things can aid in a healthy healing process and rebuilding yourself and your life.
Long-term relationships are certainly beautiful but they hold truths both good and bad, that you must be prepared for. While we don’t know the future of how things will end up or who we will love, being prepared can help us to properly overcome any hurt that may come our way. On the other end, understanding what comes with a long term partner can help you to prepare and foster a healthy, happy, and loving relationship for the long-term.