15 Signs That He Is Hiding His True Feelings From You

You feel the attraction from him but why he is so nonchalant?

By Kazuko Otsuka
15 Signs That He Is Hiding His True Feelings From You

Truly Nonchalant Or Fighting His True Feelings About You?

It’s nerve-wracking being in the boat called “Is he interested in me, or am I imagining things?” When women are attracted to someone, all emotions and feelings are on alert. The little hand gestures, messages, and comments suddenly become a novel to tell. It’s hard to be in a place where you don’t know where you stand in another person’s mind. 

There are many reasons why a person can play the cool and detached card instead of being true to their feelings. They could have experienced emotional pain in their past relationship, or they just don’t know how to show their true feelings towards a person. Whatever the case, here are some signs to check if that person you are fawning over is truly nonchalant or fighting their true feelings towards you. 

15 Signs That He is Hiding His True Feeling From You

1. Avoid Relationship Talks

You undeniably feel the attraction from him, but why does he act like he doesn’t have any thoughts of moving forward in the relationship? Wondering about this will undoubtedly consume your time, and you may never even reach an answer. They could be avoiding relationship talks for several reasons:

  • They’re not ready to go steady because of commitment issues.
  • They’re waiting for the right time to pop the question.
  • They might be a playboy. 

2. Gets Defensive

Whenever anyone puts up their defense mechanism, you immediately know something is not right. You ask them if they’re interested in you, and they get all defensive and want to talk about other things right away. You can’t help but feel hurt and wonder if you’re not worth it, but don’t go there. Give them time. Things can change. 

Another example of being defensive is when you catch them looking at you or showing any signs of affection, and they immediately shut you down. Generally, this is a weird way to react and not common to many, but if they react this way, they could be shy and don’t know how to show that they like you. 

3. Hang Out Instead of Dates

Okay, this is a big tell-tale sign to see if they’re nonchalant or hiding their true feelings towards you. Think back to your last “date.” Did they invite you to hang out or to date? Were you just imagining your little hang out to be a date, or was it really a date? These are good questions to ask yourself to differentiate their view of you. If they’re really interested, they will clarify that you are going on a date and not merely hanging out. 

4. Zones Out

There are some reasons why they zone out or space out when they’re with you. Either they’re bored, thinking of what to say, or just really dull. Let’s hope that the last one is not the case. Your lucky if the reason is the second one because that means they want to look good in front of you. They don’t want to look stupid and say the wrong things, so they take their time replying, making them look spaced out all the time. 

5. Inconsistent Behavior

Inconsistent or erratic behavior is indeed a sign that that person you’re attracted to is fighting their feelings towards you. One day they treat you like a princess, and the next, you’re no one. It hurts, doesn’t it? They literally are undergoing an inner battle inside and can’t decide where they stand. Give it time; if things don’t improve, maybe it’s time to move on. The mind games are unhealthy, and no one should experience it for long periods. 

6. Jealousy Game

Ah, good-old jealousy is a double-edged sword. With it, you can find out if someone is really attracted to you, but you can also hurt your feelings with it. If you find that the person you like shows signs of jealousy when you’re with other people on dates or the like, this is a good sign. If you’re the one showing signs of envy when they’re with other people, then you’ve fallen hard. 

7. Unending Silence

Sometimes, silence is good and healthy. If it's eternal silence, you probably should start getting worried. If there's always an unending or awkward silence during dates and you just don't know what to talk about, this is a good and bad sign. Either they are shy around you because they like you, or they're just not interested. It's one or the other, and it can't be both. 

8. One-Sided Conversations

You notice that a lot of the times, conversations are one-way. It’s not a nice place to be in, and you can’t help but feel hurt when you’re in it. This could be a sign that they are nonchalant and do care about you and just hiding it or they’re just not interested. You’re lucky if you find yourself in the just hiding their feelings towards you. 

9. Emotionally Withdrawn

You feel the attraction they have towards you, but why do you also think they are emotionally withdrawn? When someone is hiding their true feelings, it’s hard to pinpoint whether they’re just emotionally withdrawn or intentionally keeping themselves from showing their true selves. This can be a bit difficult to see, so it’s best to wait it out and wait for more signs. You don’t want to ruin what’s there by suddenly making them more emotionally detached. 

10. Petty Fights

If you find yourself in a position where you’re constantly bickering and fighting over small things, this could be a good or bad sign. Some people like to show their attraction this way while others just might really like to argue. Sometimes, when a person doesn’t know how to show they like someone, they end up annoyed with themselves, leading to quick temper and petty fights. 

11. Emotional Abuse

Another sign that they might be hiding their feelings from you is if you've been experiencing some emotional abuse. Either they don't want you to find out what their true feelings are, or they don't know how to tell you that they like you. If you're caught always wondering where you stand because of all the mixed signals, that is not a good sign. If they were just nonchalant about the whole ordeal, they wouldn't bother putting in so much effort in the first place. 

12. Doesn’t Touch You

If you catch them pulling back from a kiss or holding your hand, this is a sign that they’re having an inner fight of showing their true feelings. However, if you get signs clear as day that they’re not interested in you, pulling away from physical touch literally means nothing is there- no spark, no attraction. Sometimes, people don’t want to go the extra mile because they are afraid. 

13. Talking About the Future is a Big No

Talking about the future is a big no because it gives them anxiety. Luckily, this doesn’t mean right away that they’re not interested in you, but it’s more of they need time to make their feelings known. However, those genuinely nonchalant wouldn’t mind talking about the future because they’ve come to terms with their standing in the relationship.

14. Makes Excuses

This is a good sign to watch out to see if the person you are attracted to is hiding their feelings. If you find yourself around a group of friends joking around and making obvious remarks on the sexual tension between you guys and playing it cool or changes the topic, this is a sign that they are hiding their feelings. Look at their body language, and if they are embarrassed and do everything they can to get out of the situation, then you’re in for it good. 

15. Remembers the Little Things

Have you ever found yourself getting to know someone that remembers all the tiny bits of information about your life? This is a very good sign that they are interested in you and just taking it slowly. They make little remarks wishing you luck on your exam or work meeting- things that you don’t even remember telling them about- and your heart skips a beat. A very good sign, indeed. 

How To Make Him Realize His Love For You

Making someone realize their love for you and not the other way around is a tricky situation to be in. This is a sensitive topic that you can’t approach head-on. You can’t just say, “Just admit it, you like me, right?” because this could make them embarrassed and, in turn, make them not like you. The best way to handle this situation is by waiting it out and giving hints along the way. 

Be patient and wait for them to confess. Of course, if you like to take risks and can’t wait any longer, then nothing is stopping you from just making them confess, but do be ready for the consequences if, let’s say, they didn’t actually like you. Yikes. If you’re not in a rush and don’t mind waiting, playtime and let them be the one to say it. Give hints here and there to help them along the way. That’s the best you can do. 

Related Article: 8 Signs that He's Catching Feelings for You After You Confessed
8 Signs that He's Catching Feelings for You After You Confessed

Should you continue developing the relationship or give up?


You’re either in love or not. You either like the person or don’t like them. Anything in the gray is a tough place to be in. You never want to be the one guessing on how someone feels about you- it’s mind wrecking and time-consuming. It’s even more challenging if the person has a laid back personality, to begin with. Your there left wondering whether they’re just being themselves or hiding from you. Whatever the case, take it one step at a time and don’t rush. You’ll find the answers sooner or later. 


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