15 Funny AND Sexy Things To Text a Guy and Make Him Laugh

You can never go wrong with humor and a little bit of spice!

By Kimmy
15 Funny AND Sexy Things To Text a Guy and Make Him Laugh

Is Humor Important To Get That Good First Impression?

YES. Everyone who is good at conversing will tell you that a lovely, witty person will get 10 times more likes at a party than a strict face. You are not attending an office meeting. You are trying to mingle with new fellas. Why the long face?

A sense of humor suggests you are easily approachable and are a fun person to hang around with. Think about this, would you rather be around an intimidating person or a smiley person? That's what humor does. It adds the smile to your face and the person you are trying to impress. It leaves a bang-on first impression.

In the texting world, this is a virtue everyone should hold. No one wants to continue an emotionless conversation. It's not an essay or a school assignment. Bring some out character and personality!

What Makes A Guy Laugh?

Most guys are not very sophisticated in things they find funny, to be fair, all humans do. A silly joke can easily crack them up. Many guys love fun and slightly suggestive sexual jokes. The difference between two sexes is always a good way to make a guy laugh because it's so relatable.

How Do You Describe Good Humor?

The dictionary good humor should be a joke that entertains. It can take ideas from a situation, a culture, language difference, or be puny. Good humor should be universal. What it means is, your joke should not offend a group of people. Never make a joke insulting a group of people, especially when the joke is spreading inequality and injustice, however funny you find that "joke" to be.

A relatable joke is always preferred. Find something in common with the person you text to and make a good joke from there. A popular example would be, if you are a Chinese American meeting a fellow Chinese American, use your background as a humorous way to open up a conversation. A relatable joke brings comfort to the other person and makes him feel connected to you.

15 Funny AND Sexy Things To Text a Guy and Make Him Laugh

1. You know what's on the menu tonight? It's Me-N-U

Oops. Cheesy but a classic. Playing with words is a great way to make a guy laugh because it's casual and chill. And now he is never going to see the word menu the same way again! A strong opener like this is not for the faint-hearted. But it yields great results for the brave ones. It sure does leave a bossy, kickass first impression.

2. If I have to pick something I like more than my closet, it's probably your face!

That's huge! It a lot of commitment for a girl to say they like someone more than their closet. This lovely joke is sweet because you are giving him a top-notch compliment any girls can offer!

3. You are hotter than my stove

Oh, snap! Standing next to him must be like standing next to a fireplace because you are just burning all the time and sweating. He is irresistibly hot and makes you want to shove your face in a bucket of ice to cool down. Jokes that contain compliments are the best because not only they are cute and hilarious, they are also bringing people up and lifting their spirits.

4. It's so cold here because your hot ass isn't here

Who doesn't like getting warmed up by a hot ass? Any plans for tonight? The long dark winter nights coming, and you might want to keep me warm rather than burning in your own hotness alone. 

5. Hey, sexy! Oops how annoying is this autocorrect?

Yeh...it must've been the autocorrect. A flirty text can show your interest while keeping it chill. The best about jokes like this one is that you can see how the person reacts to it. If he is also being flirty, he is probably interested too. Otherwise, well, wrong dude!

6. If you're a library book, I'd never return you

Yep, let him know how eyecatching his face is and how much you want to rip open the cover to read him over and over again. This can easily be coupled with several slightly sexual jokes to get his attention.

7. So, have you heard that kissing burns more calories than squatting?

Well, that's not necessarily true, but it's worth a shot. Perhaps if you kiss aggressively enough, it burns more calories than running. Want to give it a try?

Masking an upfront flirty text with a joke is a fantastic method. He will laugh and he will have a chance to step back without feeling uncomfortable as you are giving him a chance to play it off as a joke too. If you just met and want to leave room for discussion and not sound so aggressive. Always mask your true desire with a joke!

8. Want to do the knock knock joke except I'm right outside of your bedroom in person?

Take me to your bedroom and we will tell each other all the knock-knock jokes we want all the way!

9. I'm getting a new bed, want to comer over and try out how durable it is?

Damn right! Invite him over to roll on your bed to see if it's really so big. Two can make a crowd. There's nothing hotter than getting invited to a girl's bed. Bounce all over it and see if it holds!

10. They say it's best to stay inside during an earthquake. You might want to stay inside of me as you rock my world!

This is a very bold move and again, not for the faint-hearted. Not every guy can handle this type of joke when you first meet, but those that do, you have found someone to connect well with! This joke is sexual and yet funny. Those on the West Coast, especially in California, might want to keep this joke in their pocket at all times. Why? Because there's always an earthquake going on in Cali!

11. You know in Sweden they dip meatballs in jam? Maybe you should dip your meatballs in my jam

Exotic! Well, it is true that they dip meatballs in jam (lingonberry sauce) in IKEA in Sweden, in case you want any reference. Bringing a sense of exotic element can make this joke 10 times funnier if he is indeed Swedish or has Swedish roots.

12. [send ghost emoji] I want to be a ghost if that means being your boo

Is that sweet or what? What's a sweeter thing to say than that! Emojis help tremendously when texting a guy and leaving an impression because they reinforce the tone and ideas you are putting forth. Most importantly, it shows your emotions and that you care.

13. My lipstick is strawberry-flavored but I'm not so sure. How about you lick my lips and let me know how it tastes?

Yum. Always down to letting a crush to lick it.

14. I think I accidentally swallowed my keys, maybe you can fish it out from my mouth with your tongue?

Yep, go deep or go home!

15. Reminds me to bring a pair of gloves when we meet because you are too hot to handle

yeah, you don't want to be burning your own hands!

How Do You Confirm If He Likes Your Texts?

It's not that difficult because if he finds your humor awkward or dislikes it, it's quite obvious. He will either ignore your jokes or reply with something very generic like a smiley face emoji. On the other hand, if he likes it, he will reply with his enthusiasm for how great this joke is and how much he enjoyed it. Or he will continue on with this joke and bring his own element to the table.

It's normal to get an over-the-top or seemingly exaggerated response in a positive way. He doesn't know you well enough and wants to express how much he enjoyed the jokes. So he may seem a bit extra with his response but it's a good sign!

Bring on more jokes if he likes it. That way he will know you two have a similar sense of humor and he will be able to crack his own jokes too. Only when you two are comfortable enough, you can talk about something else and you will know if he is the person you want down the road!

How To Transit From Texting To Relationship?

Enough jokes said. Actions always speak louder than words. Ask him out on a date face-to-face. There are only so many jokes you can crack online. When you do meet, don't leave your humor at home. Bring it with you and make sure you are as funny and approachable as you are over texts!

Some people find it hard to meet up in real life because the person is far from what they expected from the texts. With texting, you have all the time in the world to go on the internet and find a good response. In real life, your brain is your best resource. Keep a few jokes up your sleeves and don't forget to take the initiative to make the person smile.

Being in a relationship means you are able to handle the person physically as well as you do when texting. You need to show him you are who you brand yourself to be. You won't have time to research funny jokes on a date. It's best to train yourself to be more humorous and aim for a quicker response time when your date cracks a joke. The awkward silence is the worst.

It's not always easy to be the same in real life and online. But it's always good to try to be as similar as possible. If you are only good at texting jokes, you might want to think about how you can come up with them in person. It takes training but by proving your common ground (the sense of humor), transitioning to a relationship will be much easier.

Related Article: 17 Notes that You Can Send Out to Make People Happy
17 Notes that You Can Send Out to Make People Happy
Send as a letter, text or post it note to lift up their mood!


You'd be surprised by how many guys fall in love with a girl because of their sense of humor. So it's time to remember all these 15 texts to have something up your sleeves in case you need them!