10 Simple Steps on How to Approach Women Correctly

A guide to successfully approach women for small talks

By Anastasia K
10 Simple Steps on How to Approach Women Correctly

How to approach women on the street

When it comes to approaching a woman on the street, many guys might find it difficult or end up seeming disrespectful, frightening or boring and bothersome. As most women can relate, encountering street harassment from a man or a group of guys is common at some point in our lives. Hence using lines such as “Can I have your number?” or “You look fine” or a sexual innuendo might not be the best conversation opener for you as a man. 

So, how can you approach a woman you find attractive in the street appropriately? Since no woman wants to be objectified, here is how to properly approach her and engage her in a conversation and finally get her number.

1. Conversation starter

This is the starter pack to correctly approach a woman on the street. Rather than bore her with over-used conversation starter lines, settle for honesty. You can begin with a genuine and non-sexual compliment or ask her how she is doing. Also, making open comments on the weather, traffic or asking the direction to a place etc. catching her attention could work.

2. Body language

Your body language will determine whether the woman you have your eyes on will be enthusiastic about you or secretly hoping to get away from you. When you approach a lady, ensure that you look her in the eyes and maintain eye contact. Letting your eyes stray to her chest or lower body can put you off as a man that only needs her to attend to your loins.

3. Relax and let your confidence show

No female wants to be approached by a man who can’t hold a decent conversation because he seems nervous or desperate. Approach her and talk to her as calmly as you would talk to your female friends.

4. Smile

Despite not knowing how she will react to you, ensure that you smile as you approach and talk to her. You definitely do not want to pass as frightening, broody, or boring. It also pays off since smiling is contagious and she might respond to you by smiling back!

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 You’re probably sleeping like a cute little baby right now. I just wanted to say good morning beautiful.

How to approach women at work

Maybe there is a woman at work whom you’ve never talked to but have your eyes on. Yet, you do not know how to approach her without appearing weird or end up getting sued. So, how can you approach her and get her to like you? Here’s how.

1. Ask her to lunch

This is one of the easiest and harmless requests you could make to a female colleague or business associate. You can invite a few other co-workers so that it does not feel and get weird. This way, you are able to spend time with her in an environment she is comfortable with. 

2. Excuses

Making excuses to stop by her area of work can enable you to engage her in a conversation. You could either bring her coffee, paperwork or often walk by her desk to break the ice.

3. Tell her jokes

To enable her to view you as more than a colleague, you can engage her with jokes that are funny and clean. This way, you are able to openly talk to her without upsetting her or others colleagues within earshot.

4. Friends before anything else

It’s obvious you are not friends since you want to approach her for the first time. Thus, before risking to take the leap of asking her out on a date, become her friend first. This will help you to know her better. It gets much easier to take her on a date when you are already friends as compared to being coworkers yet strangers.

How to approach women in school

Dating while in school can sometimes be overwhelming, complicated and confusing. Yet, many guys will often develop a crush and feelings towards a female they find cute or attractive. At this point, you may feel anxious and confused about talking to her.

So here is how you can to do it right and end up impressing her.

1. Look your best

In order to strike a chord with her, take the time to always look your best. Chances are, girls in school will often notice handsome and clean guys and this could be your window of opportunity to approach and impress her.

2. Social media

For most school-going people – whether in high school or college – it is common to be active in various social media platforms. Thus, there could be high chances of her spending time on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter. Therefore, you can engage with her online by sending a greeting text or comment on her photographs to start the conversation.

3. Avoid making conversations about yourself

Yes, we are aware of your achievements and qualifications but that is not something you should endlessly talk about when you approach her. Also, making the impression of being narcissistic does not impress her and she could end up disliking you and your bragging attitude. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of your life without sounding cocky.

4. Approach her during the best time

School work and schedule can often make you very busy and that girl you like will also not take a break to talk to you. Thus, finding time at the start of the school day or after school and maximizing on break periods can provide time for you to talk to her and get to know her.

How to approach women online

With the numerous online dating sites available in this current day, it is totally understandable when you seek this approach in finding love. While online dating is a great way to meet a potential female partner, how you approach her is important. The goal here is to enable her to like you back and even meet with you in person.

So how do you make yourself different from other guys approaching her online? Here is how you can successfully do that.

1. The perfect image

Despite most people agreeing that inner beauty is more important than outward appearances, many women will first judge you by your profile. Since the woman you like will first meet you virtually before deciding to actually meet you, you need to have an impressive profile. Thus, use a professional photo – one that is not edited and photo-shopped, as this can cost you later when meeting her in real life. Also, add positive and not-too-personal details about yourself to help her know a bit about you.

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 Maybe you haven’t been in the dating field for quite some time now and have decided to give it a chance and now, you have the perfect man.

2. Keep things interesting without being cheesy

While you may feel a certain pressure to writing a message or email that captures her attention, you do not want to over-do humor and compliments and end up sounding desperate. Thus, in order to approach her properly, be yourself and engage her by sparingly adding compliments and humor.

3. Avoid sexual conversations

This is the first time you are talking to her and assuming that she is also physically interested, can turn a potential relationship into something sour! Women are very sensitive and while online dating is primarily used as a gateway to love and relationships, it does not always mean the chance to get laid. Therefore, only settle for subtle flirting to imply your interest.

What to say: The things to say when you approach them for small talk

Despite finding a woman attractive, you might shy off from approaching her because you simply do not know what to say. No woman wants to engage in a conversation for the first time with a boring, rude, thirsty man or one who stammers over his words out of nervousness.

Thus, here is how you can easily make small talk with her which can lead to a meaningful conversation and further knowing of each other.

1. The introduction

How you make acquaintance with her is very important and will usually determine how she responds to you. Of course, both of you are strangers and so you need to show her that you are harmless and interesting. You can introduce yourself and ask her a simple question like, “How are you?”, or pay a genuine compliment to her.

2. Give the conversation purpose

While your goal is to use small talk to get her to know and talk to you, you can’t simply leave it at the introduction and let the conversation fizzle out. Try making a general and friendly observation or be straight-forward in the conversation to positively engage her.

3. Embrace your shyness

It is okay to be a little bit nervous when talking to that cute or attractive woman. It is also okay to talk about it as a way to help you relax and make conversation. You can even try using a compliment when embracing your shyness by saying something like, “I get a little nervous when talking to a pretty lady like you”.


There are many beautiful women a man will encounter in his life, yet, might only interact with a few. While certain tasks such as approaching a woman are assumed to be a man’s job, women will not appreciate a man who does not respect her or her personal space.


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